Rumble in the jungle: what animals would win in a fight?

The cobra has something the others don’t.

If you manage to come through a fight and won with the others, you’ve done well and are safe. However, you could theoretically beat the cobra, leave it dead on the floor only to die yourself minutes later. You will not be able to stop a cobra biting you without proper handling experience. And don’t forget the spitters. If you haven’t got glasses on, you’ll be blind before you even reach it and then it’s game over.
 
Cobra would be an easy win. Take your top off and smother it, it's now blind, stomp stomp, or take your trousers off and whip at it chip damage it's health bar, if it lunges at you just tie it up like when Jackie Chan ties 3 baddies together with a towel, piece of string etc.
 
Somnambulist said:
I guess it might depend on the terrain and/or if it's starting off on the ground - they're pretty good at yeeting mountain goats off the sides of cliffs and letting gravity do the work, plus dive bomb at high speed so those talons turn into flying daggers - I'm going to assume it won't just adopt the geese tactic of the flappy winged charge.
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Closest I've been to such a critter is having a buzzard strafe me while out cycling in the country. Didn't have a helmet on and it scratched my scalp the second time.

Got off and was planning on D-locking the little **** if it came past again.

Probably nesting or something.

But that would be how a large eagle would prefer to "fight" a human or other large creature well above prey size.
 
Feek said:
No, I don’t think you could.
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Well I guess that's the thing isn't it. I mean what size croc? It's well known that crocs have no real strength to open the mouth when shut so if you could get over it and then hold its mouth closed while trying to bite out it's eyes or something then I think you have a fair chance. Yes a death roll may come into play but you should be able to avoid it before jumping it again.

Wolf would be a bit harder as they are not as stupid but make plenty of noise as well as being super agressive and it may well just refuse to fight you. Once you get around it's neck with your arm you could basically squeeze the life out of it. I'll admit that the wolf would be the most difficult to take on out of my choices.
 
I reckon Rat, house cat, goose would be relatively easy, would probably still end up with some nasty bites and scratches though mind.

Medium sized dog yes with a bit more effort - as long as it didn't get my throat immediately I reckon I could throw it around enough or get some good kicks in that would finish it off.

I reckon an Eagle is my upper limit. Yes they have massive talons and sharp beaks, but they wouldn't have the staying power. Once I got a good blow in or got hold of it I reckon I could break enough of its bones quickly enough to put it out of action, even if I'd probably have massive wounds wherever it tried to claw at me.

Large dog upwards no chance I don't think. Just from play fighting with my <20kg dog / trying to get him in the bath I know how surprisingly fast and strong dogs can be, and how difficult it is to keep hold of them if they don't want you holding them. Some 'large dogs' might be 5x my dogs weight, I reckon they'd have knocked me over and got my throat before I could even think about trying to kick it or anything.

I would love to meet those champs that reckon they could take on a grizzly bear :cry:
 
The people who think they could take an elephant? How are they even doing any damage? I feel i could spend 10 minutes punching an elephant and it'd just be stood there eating a tree not giving a crap!
 
What's the definition of 'win' here. First one to die loses?

If so I'd back myself against the cobra but I'd probably get bitten and envenomed so I might die after. Bit of a pyrrhic victory.

Under the first one to die loses scenario I'd back myself against:

Rat
Cat
Goose
Medium Dog <- might bleed out after
Eagle <- might bleed out after
Cobra <- might die of venom after

and that's it all others I'd lose easily. Only one where you may have a chance is large dog but realistically I think only The Rock sized humans would beat them.
 
Didn't we have a thread here where someone reckoned they could do in a Chimpanzee with their bare hands?
Yeah, good luck with that. After it's ripped your knob off I'm not sure you'd really have much fight left in you.
 
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