Stopping the old man looking at porn :)

turtle3 · 19 Apr 2006 at 07:24

Let him be, just get him his own keyboard mouse, save yours getting sticky, lol.

volt9291 · 19 Apr 2006 at 11:40

Xee said:
share the pron u download lol

LOL

Sinque · 23 Apr 2006 at 13:56

Slam62 said:
No offence, but you're mums probably a fair bit past her best, not the lovely shagable bit of stuff she was when they met. So you're dad is missing a bit of nice young ass, now i presume you dont want him to have an affair or anything, again no offence but he's probaly fay and ugly now anyway, so is it not relatively harmless for him to look at internet stuff at least you know where he is, i would try and keep it under control in a more subtle way, otherwise he'll get even more depressed.
Just make a few subte hints about the dodgy stuff and give a few general guidelines in a none obvious way

Anyway let me know how he gets on i for one have seen a website of a young lady frm wales who seems ery friendly and willing to please (just like wives used to be), youcan even log on to her sie and book a session, (cough: umm councelling session) she was even kind enough to go on tour visiting hotels that may be more convenient for her clients.... i mean patients.

To me that post sounds offensive, intrusive and scary. :eek:

Jimbo Mahoney · 23 Apr 2006 at 17:05

Sinque said:
To me that post sounds offensive, intrusive and scary.

That's nothing!

Neon said:
cut his penis and balls off, and tell him to have fun.

fini · 23 Apr 2006 at 17:17

One dinner time wait until everyone's sat down at the table and walk into the dining room, with your keyboard in hand, shouting 'Dad, you got my keyboard all sticky AGAIN! How do you keep doing this?'

fini

i know nothing · 23 Apr 2006 at 18:39

MNuTz said:
get a keylogger that loads at startup on his account, he may be able to delete his history but he'll never know about the logger (until you print it off and leave it lying where he will find it!)

No what you want is a program so when you start up the machine you see a splash screen that says "Internet History Logger"....."Now starting...."

chex · 23 Apr 2006 at 19:19

"someone keeps looking at porn on my computer" when he's in earshot.

..interrogate one of your kids about it while he's around

KizZ · 23 Apr 2006 at 19:24

Sharing the porn is not a bad idea :cool:

. Altho I wouldnt do it, Im too greedy :eek:

Doorman80 · 23 Apr 2006 at 19:25

i know nothing said:
No what you want is a program so when you start up the machine you see a splash screen that says "Internet History Logger"....."Now starting...."

Yeah I thought of doing something like that. At the moment I just have a file on the desktop called "INTERNET HISTORY LOGGER" Its just a text file but its there, right in the middle of the desktop in big capital letters.

georges · 23 Apr 2006 at 20:42

Doorman80 said:
Own account it is then. He'll prolly get the hint when he see's he has to log in now.

Call it "pronos"

georges · 23 Apr 2006 at 20:47

It'd probably be easy.. mine has a big pirate sailing above the xp loading bar. I re ckon you could download a theme thing and just change the image.

Radiation · 23 Apr 2006 at 21:07

Make a list of relatively safe sites and put it somewhere he's likely to come across.

Doorman80 · 23 Apr 2006 at 21:52

Radiation said:
Make a list of relatively safe sites and put it somewhere he's likely to come across.

I dont want him coming arcoss anything, and if he did I certainly wouldnt be cleaning it up.

Trigger · 23 Apr 2006 at 23:17

Doorman80 said:
I dont want him coming arcoss anything, and if he did I certainly wouldnt be cleaning it up.

That's just wrong :eek:

Wouldn't be very difficult though to make a splash screen in C# that comes up full screen for a few seconds upon logon

Caged · 24 Apr 2006 at 00:35

Zefan said:
Nuke him from orbit with firey ovaries.

You've sure mastered this 'humour' thing.

therubble · 24 Apr 2006 at 09:43

Sit your dad down, and give him a load of raz mag's. Laminate them as well and job's a good en. Tell your dad portable porn is the way forward.

Or my personal favorite,

Put a web cam near your computer, and then broadcast him beaten himself off across the net. The income from that will pay for a new PC and a few beers for yourself everybody wins. He gets his razzle and ** get beer and a clean computer.

chex · 24 Apr 2006 at 12:23

o.O

I assume youd need the money to pay for a lifetime of therapy too