Supervisor - Formal Greivance

The apology is off the table. Union view is that any apology will be seen as admission of guilt and will be used against me.

Their view is there is zero evidence until I do. Claim is based on hearsay and this is why management want it done informally.

You're still not being clear here - what is the actual issue? What are they claiming happened?

1. Conversation happened.
2. I expressed an OPINION on a factual happening, nothing I stated was untrue.

You're not being clear here - stating some facts or airing an opinion isn't necessarily a disciplinary matter - was there something specific about that opinion that might make it one? Or are the making some additional claim re: things you didn't actually say?

If you didn't do anything wrong then you have nothing to apologise for and your union rep is correct.

If you really have company blackmail level knowledge the smart move is to use it to stop the process, not to try to change the outcome.

No, that would be dumb too. The smart move would be to not get involved in any blackmail in the first place.
 
So I'll update:

1. So far I have had no FORMAL meeting regarding this, however the manager dealing with has tried twice now to get me to apologise so that 'it doesn't need to go any further and be marked on my record'

2. As for specifics, I've not actually been told the exact thing I'm supposed to have said, other than being part of the discussion and giving an opinion that apparently upset the the complainant when they were told what I allegedly said

3. The complainant raised the grievance on 30/01/25, I was not informed of this until just over 2 weeks later. As of now it's been almost a month

4. No other participant of the conversation in question has been complained about.

5. My union rep says to let it run. They believe it the management won't go any further than the informal chats I've already had due to the lack of evidence. The personnel that told the complainant what I allegedly said aren't willing to make formal statements as it would be career suicide because all their colleagues would then know they're rats & they'd end up ostracised.
 
You should like a walking red flag tbh

What industry? So I can avoid more than anything.
 
Spoken with Union chair today.

The apology is off the table. Union view is that any apology will be seen as admission of guilt and will be used against me.

Their view is there is zero evidence until I do. Claim is based on hearsay and this is why management want it done informally.

Union position is also that of one of being singled out.



Tbh they try to fire me I know enough about goings on that will secure my job ;)

Sounds like an escalation.

Why not "I do not know what has been reported to you, but if anything that i have said is hurtful, i apologise."

Be the bigger man. Even if you feel that you are in the right, an apology never hurts, particularly in private, and get on with your life. Unions rarely help resolve these issues.
 
If you cant be kind, sometimes its better to say nothing at all.

Appreciate the special treatment will drive people mad, but bitching to others about it does not get it fixed or resolved. Are you just mad that you dont have a special arrangement?
Tbh they try to fire me I know enough about goings on that will secure my job
This reads quite childish, who wants to stay in a job that has almost got rid of them?
Or you could look at it and think, I deserve better than this and walk away.
 
You should like a walking red flag tbh

What industry? So I can avoid more than anything.

Transport industry

Sounds like an escalation.

Why not "I do not know what has been reported to you, but if anything that i have said is hurtful, i apologise."

Be the bigger man. Even if you feel that you are in the right, an apology never hurts, particularly in private, and get on with your life. Unions rarely help resolve these issues.

Because ANY apology would be used as an admission of guilt when no guilt has been established. There's precedence that management have done this before, got the person to apologise whilst everything was off record then used it against them.

Union/My position that if an apology is all that is wanted by the complainant then we get that on record, in a formal setting and a formal apology would then be issued. This would then close the matter officially and cannot be used.

If you cant be kind, sometimes its better to say nothing at all.

Appreciate the special treatment will drive people mad, but bitching to others about it does not get it fixed or resolved. Are you just mad that you dont have a special arrangement?

It's more of a case of this individual has been known to abuse said special arrangement, been caught but management swept it under the carpet. My position is that the arrangement should have, at minimum, been nullified due to that abuse. I'd even go as far as it being gross misconduct. There are also other couples within the business that have asked for similar treatment, like being granted holidays together and been refused
 
There are also other couples within the business that have asked for similar treatment, like being granted holidays together and been refused
So, why are you their voice of reason and why should you put your head above the water to be shot?

Sounds like this is something that's got absolutely sweet FA to do with you, but you stuck your nose in to it.
 
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So, why are you their voice of reason and why should you put your head above the water to be shot?

Sounds like this is something that's got absolutely sweet FA to do with you, but you stuck your nose in to it.

Or I took part in a discussion about it and gave my opinion?
 
Since when do people have to apologise for having an opinion about something someone else doesn't like at work? Wtf? Surely you are allowed to say someone is getting special treatment without getting into a disciplinary.
Unless there's more to it. Which I suspect.
 
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