Talking at work

[flibbage0]

Anyone here struggle to find common ground with people at work?

I don't work at one fixed place, but to be honest most of my work colleagues are middle aged women and as nice as they are, I struggle to find anything in common to talk about other than asking where they're going on holiday

Normally it wouldn't bother me but it makes it extremely boring and now I rarely talk to anyone

Anyone else share a similar issue?

 

[Haze]

I don't really do small talk at work, I know very little what the staff get upto outside of work, and don't want to know

 

[Begbie]

Sometimes. luckily we keep the same pattern. So right now it's been me and two others for a while now. Two of us share some hobbies and the other different.

 

[Deleted member 77746]

Work and home don't mix unless you are in a click.

 

[Kronos]

What on earth are you on about, talking indeed. If your not working then your head should be buried in your phone after all it is the modern way.
Do you have to have things in common to talk to people these days, god knows how I have managed these 65 years?

 

[Rroff]

I've rarely found common ground with anyone socially. Fortunately most of the people I work with are easy going so we kind of drift in and out of conversation without there being anything awkward, etc.

One thing I find a bit problematic is that even today so much conversation revolves around what is on TV and pretty much my whole life I couldn't care less what is on TV especially these days of on demand and so much of it I find garbage anyhow.

 

[Yaayuh!]

I don't have much in common with anyone at work any more, those that I would socialise with have either left, been made redundant or brown-nosed themselves into isolation. So I haven't really talked to anyone at work casually for a year or so.

 

[Minstadave]

Just flirt with the old gals, they love a bit of chat.

 

[Lopéz]

Anyone here struggle to find common ground with people at work?

No. I can talk to pretty much anyone about anything, regardless of whether it's something I'm particularly well versed on or interested in.
In work, at home, in the pub, whatever - it's all the same.

 

[BUDFORCE]

No. I can talk to pretty much anyone about anything, regardless of whether it's something I'm particularly well versed on or interested in.
In work, at home, in the pub, whatever - it's all the same.

Same, only when at work, and it's mostly for selfish reasons to pass time/boredom.

But ask questions, listen, and seem interested. It'll pay itself back then you can get on, as I said just in work time, outside of work is different.

 

[flibbage0]

No. I can talk to pretty much anyone about anything, regardless of whether it's something I'm particularly well versed on or interested in.
In work, at home, in the pub, whatever - it's all the same.

I know this might sound silly, but how do you do it? Avoiding the awkward silences or blank expressions on people's faces as they don't know what the hell you're going on about etc.

 

[Maccapacca]

Work is boring if you're not chit chatting

 

[Minstadave]

I know this might sound silly, but how do you do it? Avoiding the awkward silences or blank expressions on people's faces as they don't know what the hell you're going on about etc.

Just show an interest in what they talk about, even if you don't give a toss, fake it. It's not about talking about what you are interested in.

 

[NoobCannon]

I prefer to work as fast as possible and go
Home and everyone else is the same, no time for non work related chat.

 

[ttaskmaster]

NVM

 

[robj20]

First place i worked we were all friends, all socialised outside work often. Still are after we all moved on. Where i am now, i only really talk to the owner and MD socially as they know my better than most.

 

[Lopéz]

I know this might sound silly, but how do you do it? Avoiding the awkward silences or blank expressions on people's faces as they don't know what the hell you're going on about etc.

I've never thought about it - it would be like asking me how I remember to breathe in and out.

Giving it some consideration, here's an example:

Me - Alright mate, you coming to lunch?
Person X - Nah, I'm trying to be healthy and bringing my own
Me - [I don't care] How come, you look in decent enough shape?
Person X - Well I've been getting into this new fasting craze where you eat controlled portions ever X days and starve for the others?
Me - [I don't care] Ha, not sure I could manage that - after 24 hours I'd be clamming, don't you find the hunger pangs screw your concentration when you're in deep work time?
Person X - It can do I guess, but what I'll usually do is just hammer down the water to stave it off and keep me on track
etc etc etc until the conversation either reaches a natural conclusion or a third party interruption prematurely ends the talk.

Or how about from the opposite perspective

Me - Anyone know anything about Zen gardening?
Person Y - Zen gardening, WFT is that?
Me - Haven't you ever seen those miniature gravel gardens where everything is laid out in patterns etc etc
Person Y - Dude you are into some well weird stuff. So where does it come from?
Me - I first saw it in a book in 1989 and I just really fancied getting into it
etc etc etc as above.

Isn't this normal basic social interaction that most humans are pretty much coded with from birth? I didn't really know people had to actively think about it, short sightedness on my part I guess.

 

[Roar87]

Nah, I had that issue when I worked in a small office populated by middle aged women I had nothing in common with though, I just left the job.

 

[Minstadave]

I've never thought about it - it would be like asking me how I remember to breathe in and out.

Giving it some consideration, here's an example:

Me - Alright mate, you coming to lunch?
Person X - Nah, I'm trying to be healthy and bringing my own
Me - [I don't care] How come, you look in decent enough shape?
Person X - Well I've been getting into this new fasting craze where you eat controlled portions ever X days and starve for the others?
Me - [I don't care]Isn't this normal basic social interaction that most humans are pretty much coded with from birth? I didn't really know people had to actively think about it, short sightedness on my part I guess.

Lots of people struggle with social interaction. There's loads of adults with diagnosable autism out there that will never have a diagnosis.

 

[Mr.Shabz]

Open office, hot-desking and skeleton staff left after redundancies, means you could be sat on your own all day if no one comes in to the office, so always grateful of any kind of chat.