Soldato
Meh. If you can't handle discussion about your life, don't post about it.
Classic denial attitude though. Good luck!!!
Classic denial attitude though. Good luck!!!
The 5 year plan to £50k
- Thread starter FoxEye
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Do they not want you to/hope that you'd eventually move out and start a family of your own etc...?
I get that landlords are evil etc.. but I do wonder if in a decade or two you might consider retrospectively that paying rent for a couple of years or so might have been worthwhile if it got you into the career you wanted and allowed you to get your own place, settle down etc..etc..
Without mentioning my parents any more (please), let me just ask you.
Is it a good thing to struggle... I mean really struggle at some point in your life?
Let's say for argument's sake, that the amount I earn means I would have nothing left after paying rent and living costs. Be unable to save anything and probably have to sell my car, etc.
Is that going to make me happy (clearly not), or is the idea that it's character building to have nothing and no one and be at complete rock-bottom for a while? That it does a person good?
People live at home (increasingly) because the alternative is to barely be able to exist.
Is everybody here so middle-class that struggling to exist isn't something they could possibly understand? Or maybe everybody is coupled off so don't understand just having a single income? And not a great one at that?
Is it a good thing to struggle... I mean really struggle at some point in your life?
Let's say for argument's sake, that the amount I earn means I would have nothing left after paying rent and living costs. Be unable to save anything and probably have to sell my car, etc.
Is that going to make me happy (clearly not), or is the idea that it's character building to have nothing and no one and be at complete rock-bottom for a while? That it does a person good?
People live at home (increasingly) because the alternative is to barely be able to exist.
Is everybody here so middle-class that struggling to exist isn't something they could possibly understand? Or maybe everybody is coupled off so don't understand just having a single income? And not a great one at that?
Soldato
Why bother? The guy evidently has a problem facing up to truths and clearly has some personal mental issues he needs to overcome, all the while leaching off the parents and justifying it to himself. He appears beyond help and without any urge to take responsibility for himself.
I've not read the thread back, but I believe in the past when I read it you were earning high 20s? You're 39(?) now, do you not have a considerable pot saved up that you can get a decent mortgage?
And personally yes, I think it is good for people to experience struggle once in their life, it's a vital learning experience imo.
Depends entirely on the end goal.
If I was in a dead end rut and moving to rented accommodation would mean a short term struggle with the end goal of kick starting a new career with good prospects and opportunities, then yes it could be a good thing.
If it's just moving out for the sake of it and nothing else then no, it's obviously daft.
I'm not suggesting you move out and go to some other location in order to push trollies around Tesco car park or to flip burgers etc... I thought the point of the thread was that you'd want to start a new career, if you're in a location where there are fewer opportunities then it would seem sensible to be open to moving around in order to initiate a career (especially when you're single and in position where you're not tied down to a single place by a mortgage, family etc...).
Then once you've established yourself in a career perhaps you can either move back to where your parents live or indeed settle down/buy a place in some nearby county - especially if you've already got the deposit for a house available.
I was going to add something long winded and wordy, but I'll just ask one question.
I realise you don't want to line a landlords pockets, and you're concerned that the cost of living on your own would be prohibitive, but for the right opportunity would you not consider a flat share?
I flat shared with somebody for 5 years after being completely and utterly on my arse financially for an extended period of time. Was it as good as having my own space? God no, but then it was better than going back to live with my mum in rural Essex would have been.
I realise you don't want to line a landlords pockets, and you're concerned that the cost of living on your own would be prohibitive, but for the right opportunity would you not consider a flat share?
I flat shared with somebody for 5 years after being completely and utterly on my arse financially for an extended period of time. Was it as good as having my own space? God no, but then it was better than going back to live with my mum in rural Essex would have been.
Bear in mind I didn't bump this thread. That was those of you who wanted answers about my current situation. I should probably have stayed well enough away from it.
Tbh the more I think about it the more the future appears bleak and hopeless. This world we've created weeds out people like me. You've got to be smart, strong-willed, resilient and I'm none of those.
I've kind of given up really. It is what it is. Life is tough, I'm not able to deal. The end.
Whoa! Take it easy fella, you have no clue about foxy’s shizzles or dizzles, I suspect this is one of those cases where what he’s telling us isn’t nearly as important as what he isn’t telling us. As you say he’s clearly got some baggage so leave him to it, why the attackyface all over his bizzle? No skin off your teeth or mine.
Aside from quoting cliches like 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger', I personally think there are lots of times that yes it is a good thing. Personally my father went bankrupt when I was 19 and I had to quit Uni to come back home and work a couple of bar jobs to help feed the family for some years. I've also had a few times where redundancy hit and a divorce and it was a real struggle. I personally think my life is better for it in many ways. Off the top of my head:
- I've become much more risk averse than my father ever was that has led to stability (and as such happiness);
- The fact I've seen some really dark times means I get less anxious about some things these days that others do - good for my mental health;
- It's given me a lot of 'life' lessons that I help others learn from;
- The hard times absolutely drove me on to do better in my work and life generally for fear of returning to them.
Never the end, nothing is ever the end, sometimes you just need a fresh approach. Like some others in this thread I’d love to offer some advice (and trust me, I’m in a considerably better position than most to offer such advice) but you’re caving up and hiding. Git yo shizzle off yo chest, if not to us then to someone, if you wanna drop me a trust then please do, Rome wasn’t built in a day but it started somewhere. By the way you put things you’ve got nothing to lose so why not risk it? You’ll be surprised at how much better you’ll feel and how it’ll help your confidence. Good luck broseph, don’t let crap get you down
He's a well-known white supremacist, and you should be ashamed to promote him. What is wrong with you?
@FoxEye - you ignored this first time around so I will ask you again. What positive steps have you taken over the last 5 years to get closer to your goals of either earning £50k or buying a house? For much of this thread it seems like don't want to do anything at all.
Soldato
Because I was merely discussing his situation and gave an opinion that he didn't like. From their he went ultra defensive, called me spiteful and like a petal threw me on ignore, all because he didn't like being told what is obvious.... No parent wants their child living with them when they're hitting on 40yrs old. Foxeye has had years of friendly advice and support, yet the guy still refuses to do anything with his life. This thread is a joke, the arbitrary figure of £50k is telling that he doesn't have a clue what he's doing, yet he seems unwilling to listen to anyone at all who does.
A 40 year old man! I dispair.
I'd wager that: he won't ever achieve this silly goal; he won't ever leave his parents (why would he when he's being carried?); he won't go anywhere in life. It's alright sticking up for the guy, but it gets a bit boring after years of reading the same pitiful crap. Pity is what Foxeye seeks and pity is all he gets.
It doesn't have to be, the not wanting to rent issue is an entirely artificial thing that presents a massive obstacle to being able to pursue something if your parents don't live in an area where plenty of jobs are available, that is perhaps something you could try and work on with say a therapist/councillor etc... Sure it is unlikely that anyone is going to hand you a career on a plate that happens to be an easy commute from where your parents live and if you're not prepared to move yourself then you've got some severe but entirely self imposed limitations, that isn't some fault with "the world" or other people.
I mean for example there was this posted recently:
https://forums.overclockers.co.uk/t...ave-no-experience-or-qualifications.18858237/
Someone offering a potential new career, maybe specialising in security. Quick search for flats in Southampton and you can get one to yourself for £700 a month:
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-71353534.html
25k gives you approx 1700 net per month:
https://listentotaxman.com/25000?yr=2019
And of course you'd expect to have pay rises as you gain experience/qualifications... not to mention that after 2-3 years you might well want to move to a new employer (for a bigger pay rise) or consider contracting (for a nice daily rate).
The 5 year thing isn't a bad goal so long as it is more targeted at actually finding something you enjoy, perhaps something that gives you a nice skillset etc.. rather than just targeted at a particular figure. You could certainly improve your life if you were prepared to put some effort into it, the situation you end up in (though sometimes subject to events beyond your control) is still mostly down to you and the choices you make, not anyone else.
What is wrong with you? The guy recommend some self help that is all, as far as I'm aware JP's books have helped a lot of people and have nothing at all to do with white supremacy. Why deliberately post misinformation in a thread where others are offering advice. Rather tellingly you've provided nothing to back up your claims.
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