Soldato
I have a 10 month year old and she is awesome.
That is all.
If you don't want kids don't have them, simples.
That is all.
If you don't want kids don't have them, simples.
The big children debate
- Thread starter stuie
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Caporegime
Not really, I can feed a child anywhere. We can sleep anywhere. A pet can be worse than a child in these situation
Soldato
Five years or so ago I was completely indifferent to having kids, maybe even thinking I didn't want them, and that people who had them suddenly changed into douches.
Then I fell in love with the right woman, and you know over time, because we are awesome we started thinking how cool, cute and wonderful it would be to create some awesomeness of our own, a baby!
Now, as a dad to the most awesome 5 week old baby boy ever I am super over the moon! My jaw literally aches from smiling some days, and he is the best fun ever! A proper cheeky one! Facebook pics, constant chewing peoples ears off about my boy, you name it, its me.
This is nature.
Then I fell in love with the right woman, and you know over time, because we are awesome we started thinking how cool, cute and wonderful it would be to create some awesomeness of our own, a baby!
Now, as a dad to the most awesome 5 week old baby boy ever I am super over the moon! My jaw literally aches from smiling some days, and he is the best fun ever! A proper cheeky one! Facebook pics, constant chewing peoples ears off about my boy, you name it, its me.
This is nature.
Caporegime
I was merely implying that if a couple wished to back-pack around Croatia randomly one month, it'd be most likely possible. With children, it's most likely impossible.
Probably an extreme example but one which favours my point
Maybe I came on strong with the term "lost your freedom", but certainly downgraded your freedom. I'm sure this can't be argued. There must be limitations in your life which are now present which were not before?
Unless of course you're in a position where money is not a factor and you have the benefit of friends/family to help look after your child/children when you want to go out just the two of you.
OP based on your posts here, I for one am thankful you have chosen not to reproduce.
With the exception of my dislike for children is there any reason for that or is it purely based on your assumption I'm a bad person for not liking kids?
Maybe I read it wrong, but could you clarify.
Do you dislike kids in general ?
Do you just not want to reproduce?
Do you dislike it when people bang on about kids etc?
I thought it was the second one with a pinch of the third as opposed to simply not liking kids at all, ever, in anyway.
Peoples opinions change constantly, I'm not saying yours will but I wasn't pro-having kids in my 20s but by the time I was in my early 30s and with the right partner I started to change my mind, not because of her but because I realised it was something I wanted for both of us.
My best mate has no interest in having kids, but he actually quite likes spending time with mine and his niece and nephew, just that he also likes handing them back and going to his nice tidy house
Caporegime
I do find it amusing how everyone's child is the most awesome child ever.
I mean, that's a totally objective view, right?
I mean, that's a totally objective view, right?
I do find it amusing how everyone's child is the most awesome child ever.
I mean, that's a totally objective view, right?
Absolutely, anyone saying otherwise is an idiot
Caporegime
I do find it amusing how everyone's child is the most awesome child ever.
I mean, that's a totally objective view, right?
lol, was actually going to quote the guy above who said this about his daughter buy you've summed it up.
I don't have kids, don't want kids anytime soon but I don't hammer on at people abuot how I don't want them and how my life is great because I don't have them. I have seen first hand though how those with kids just don't shut up about them. Particularly on facebook etc.
The gf has a friend who posts literally 100s of times a day to explain what one of her offspring has just done. 'He just sneezed, lol, face was funny, lol.' 'She just giggled, lol'.
Some people with offspring need to realise that sometimes...just sometimes...other people really don't care about your child that tbh is average and unspectacular in the grand scheme of things.
Maybe I read it wrong, but could you clarify.
Do you dislike kids in general ?
Do you just not want to reproduce?
Do you dislike it when people bang on about kids etc?
I thought it was the second one with a pinch of the third as opposed to simply not liking kids at all, ever, in anyway.
Peoples opinions change constantly, I'm not saying yours will but I wasn't pro-having kids in my 20s but by the time I was in my early 30s and with the right partner I started to change my mind, not because of her but because I realised it was something I wanted for both of us.
My best mate has no interest in having kids, but he actually quite likes spending time with mine and his niece and nephew, just that he also likes handing them back and going to his nice tidy house
Its a mix of all 3 tbh
I hate the costa coffee mothers meetings chatting about school uniforms and how "they wont stand" for whatever it is thats happening with their kids that week, and then tell the world about just how much stuff theyve got to do when they get home, **** off home and do it then if your that busy
I hate that no matter what conversation your conducting with someone a new parent will have to interrupt with a "hilarious" comment about their kid even though its not relevant to the topic at hand
I dislike the sound of children in general, the high pitched squealing they make which seems to be anything from a cute giggle to balls of tears it all sounds the same to me one anoying high pitch squeal.
I also dont want to loose my independence something Ive worked hard to achieve and I know I would do
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OP, sounds like you may need to surround yourself with better people (if possible).
I have friends with kids, friends without kids, friends who never want kids and I am pretty sure everyone gets a chance to speak and enjoy conversation without anyone dictating or being a bore. May be you just need brighter/nicer friends.
I am sure you are just mis-hitting irreverent rather than actually being sociopathic.
I have friends with kids, friends without kids, friends who never want kids and I am pretty sure everyone gets a chance to speak and enjoy conversation without anyone dictating or being a bore. May be you just need brighter/nicer friends.
I am sure you are just mis-hitting irreverent rather than actually being sociopathic.
Soldato
I'm going to state the obvious. You cannot even begin to feel what its like to have kids until you actually become a parent. There, I've done it. Obvious fact is obvious. 
We left it fairly late in the game to have kids (I was 40, wife 39) and it has been THE absolute best thing that has ever happened to me (and us). It's really hard to explain, parents will know what I mean. Life changing? - Oh yes, indeed. Awesome? - Absolutely without a doubt.
I've got friends who swore they would never have kids because they really weren't interested in 'that sort of thing' and wanted to cavort around enjoying themselves for years to come. Then suddenly a few of them had an unexpected situation arise and lo and behold, baby is on the way. These folk (so far its happened to 3 friends) have changed their views completely and are all fantastic parents. It's actually quite pleasant to see someone go from absolutely 'not wanting kids full stop' to all of a sudden being put in that position and lapping it up 100%!!.
We left it fairly late in the game to have kids (I was 40, wife 39) and it has been THE absolute best thing that has ever happened to me (and us). It's really hard to explain, parents will know what I mean. Life changing? - Oh yes, indeed. Awesome? - Absolutely without a doubt.
I've got friends who swore they would never have kids because they really weren't interested in 'that sort of thing' and wanted to cavort around enjoying themselves for years to come. Then suddenly a few of them had an unexpected situation arise and lo and behold, baby is on the way. These folk (so far its happened to 3 friends) have changed their views completely and are all fantastic parents. It's actually quite pleasant to see someone go from absolutely 'not wanting kids full stop' to all of a sudden being put in that position and lapping it up 100%!!.
I’m kind of the opposite. I want kids but I’ve no idea when we can have them. We’re both 26, getting married next year, but right now there’s no way we could afford them financially. I’d rather be a younger parent than older and also don’t want to leave things too late biologically. I know there’s never an ideal time to have kids though so to keep putting it off or it will never happen.
Caporegime
I was merely implying that if a couple wished to back-pack around Croatia randomly one month, it'd be most likely possible. With children, it's most likely impossible.
Probably an extreme example but one which favours my point
Maybe I came on strong with the term "lost your freedom", but certainly downgraded your freedom. I'm sure this can't be argued. There must be limitations in your life which are now present which were not before?
Unless of course you're in a position where money is not a factor and you have the benefit of friends/family to help look after your child/children when you want to go out just the two of you.
Yeah that falls very heavily in your favour
Though realistically there would be no reason not to take a kid on a half decently involving month long holiday. Just would need to tailor it a touch to make it good for all involved.
So yes, you are right that there is a downgrade as such, but then its only a downgrade if you think of it in such a way. Most parents see it as just a change to include the new part of the family
It's all part of the adjustment process, unfortunately a lot of people fail to grasp this when they have children
We can go out when we want, should we ask family to look after the kids. We were away for a weekend not long ago and the kids were fine with family for the duration
We do have to consider the time that we are out, when we take them with us, I know some people take kids to the pub and let them fall asleep on chairs but we aren't that sort of people anyway!
I'm 29 and feel much the same as the OP. The main difference being, that when someone on my facebook continually posts crap about their children, I unfollow them so I don't have to read about it. The latest trend seems to be these picture 'quotes'. Generally some banal crap about how special it is being a mother. If it's so special, why are you sitting on facebook all day bored out yer **** instead of being out enjoying life...
I cannot stand children. Self-absorbed, inconsiderate little *****. It's a crying shame that I'll more than likely end up having them some day. Then I'll have to fork out a fortune to get someone to look after them.
I cannot stand children. Self-absorbed, inconsiderate little *****. It's a crying shame that I'll more than likely end up having them some day. Then I'll have to fork out a fortune to get someone to look after them.
Caporegime
Not many people are in the position that they can "afford" children. Just have them when you feel is right and you will find a way to manage
Associate
Enrage may be the wrong word I'll grant you that but being able to reproduce is not a right.
Getting IVF is different from say kidney dialysis. These people don't need it to survive. Its money wasted and more lives being created on an already incredibly populated world.