The Rise of Lonely Single Straight Men

malachi said:
But many of these suicides, such as in my friends situation (RIP) wasn't because of loneliness was because of having his kids taken away from him by his ex. Or in other cases, men loose their job, get into financial issues so suicide is their only way out.
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No it's not. They may see it as their only way out but that's not the same as it being the only way out.

Now your friends kids have no dad because of the selfish actions of said dad.

Suicidal ideation is fine. When you are at your lowest point in life, these thoughts can form and feel quite reasonable. Acting on them is another matter especially when it will affect others e.g. family.

Given the demographic of this forum I can bet that quite a few on here have had serious suicidal thoughts and never carried them out once things are rationalised.


I do agree that male suicide is a national disaster however. Perhaps if the same level of advertising/discussion on this as there is for other demographic's problems, it may lower it.

Instead, the current discussion in the UK is how bad men are and that they must change without identifying the root causes and supporting that change.
 
Alice In Wonderland said:
People seem to go to Turkey a lot for their teeth too.
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Then come back here and irrationally expect the NHS to fix the damage some charlatan has done. Even most private dentists in England are very reluctant to try and fix up the many catastrophes that cheap Turkish "dentists" cause to penny pinching health tourists.
 
Richie said:
No it's not. They may see it as their only way out but that's not the same as it being the only way out.

Now your friends kids have no dad because of the selfish actions of said dad.

Suicidal ideation is fine. When you are at your lowest point in life, these thoughts can form and feel quite reasonable. Acting on them is another matter especially when it will affect others e.g. family.

Given the demographic of this forum I can bet that quite a few on here have had serious suicidal thoughts and never carried them out once things are rationalised.


I do agree that male suicide is a national disaster however. Perhaps if the same level of advertising/discussion on this as there is for other demographic's problems, it may lower it.

Instead, the current discussion in the UK is how bad men are and that they must change without identifying the root causes and supporting that change.
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I did. Too scared to do it though (never tried. Wanted to try).

Depression runs in my family. Both biological parents.
My sisters show traits of anxiety particularly badly.


Glad I didn't go through with it. But keeping on mental health is critical. Without that all of life can fall apart. Relationships, self esteem etc etc.


That said I do understand that for some people it is the only way out. Or it seems like it. But yes, if you have kids it is selfish. But I like to think most people at least think they've tried all other alternatives.

Tough subject.
 
I dont 'agree' with suicide, it's incredibly hard on the people.left behind, but I think you need to have experienced true depression to truly empathise.

I got to the point where I didn't care if I woke up, I never thought of actively doing something but my apathy for life was devastating. God knows what the mind of someone is like at the point they decide to do it, it's far from normal or remotely rational, thats for sure.
 
Richie said:
No it's not. They may see it as their only way out but that's not the same as it being the only way out.

Now your friends kids have no dad because of the selfish actions of said dad.

Suicidal ideation is fine. When you are at your lowest point in life, these thoughts can form and feel quite reasonable. Acting on them is another matter especially when it will affect others e.g. family.

Given the demographic of this forum I can bet that quite a few on here have had serious suicidal thoughts and never carried them out once things are rationalised.


I do agree that male suicide is a national disaster however. Perhaps if the same level of advertising/discussion on this as there is for other demographic's problems, it may lower it.

Instead, the current discussion in the UK is how bad men are and that they must change without identifying the root causes and supporting that change.
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I occasionally get the feeling of “my life is so ****, I’m better off dead”, but I’m too scared of the unknown and I still have close family. The last thing I would want is to devastate them and being the sort of people they are, be left with feelings of guilt and “could we have done more”
 
wesimmo said:
I dont 'agree' with suicide, it's incredibly hard on the people.left behind, but I think you need to have experienced true depression to truly empathise.

I got to the point where I didn't care if I woke up, I never thought of actively doing something but my apathy for life was devastating. God knows what the mind of someone is like at the point they decide to do it, it's far from normal or remotely rational, thats for sure.
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Sadly if someone completes suicide, they might end their own pain and suffering; but they will also pass on the trauma to those who are left behind.
 
Vauxmad said:
My wife passed away in April. We were together for 15 years.

I’ve just turned 40 and I don’t know what scares me more – the prospect of being alone or the thought of trying to get back into the dating world.
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Sorry for your loss dude.

Still early days for that. Allow yourself to properly grieve, you don't want to take into the dating world, though I'm sure the pain will never entirely leave. 40 is still young, you've plenty of time left to find someone else, I'd take care of you right now though.
 
very sorry to hear of your loss @Vauxmad

I am not going through that but I am seperating from my wife and we have 2 young kids 2 and 7, thankfully for now it's very amicable but who knows what goes on through her head. I'm 44 and overweight, balding and greying as each day passes. I shall remain single but I do want to have some fun again that's for sure.
 
Richie said:
No it's not. They may see it as their only way out but that's not the same as it being the only way out.

Now your friends kids have no dad because of the selfish actions of said dad.

Suicidal ideation is fine. When you are at your lowest point in life, these thoughts can form and feel quite reasonable. Acting on them is another matter especially when it will affect others e.g. family.

Given the demographic of this forum I can bet that quite a few on here have had serious suicidal thoughts and never carried them out once things are rationalised.


I do agree that male suicide is a national disaster however. Perhaps if the same level of advertising/discussion on this as there is for other demographic's problems, it may lower it.

Instead, the current discussion in the UK is how bad men are and that they must change without identifying the root causes and supporting that change.
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Middle aged male suicide is a major problem. Not helped by most of us around that age being raised by men and in a time when men didn't show emotional vulnerability. I include myself in that group and I'm terrible at sharing feelings with friends when things aren't going well, I'll just put a smile on my face and go with there are people way worse off than me, doesn't actually help me though. Fortunate my life has been pretty good but I did go though a few years of terrible anxiety and panic attacks in my early 30s that did have me asking the question as I couldn't see a way out. Eventually I got the medical help I had been asking for and got past it. I certainly wouldn't judge anyone for being suicidal or even going though with it, life can get pretty dark sometimes. Though some people make terrible choices on how and where they do it
 
V F said:
No offence to bald guys but sometimes reading this thread, it doesn't feel like the rise of lonely single men. It feels like a midlife crisis/vanity thread and trying to let go of and accept what they once had. Nor was there a time I ever remembered men wearing any form of makeup unless you were in the entertainment industry. But I guess for so long now with all the world of selfies, here we are.
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Mid life crisis you say?
Not sure what you mean :)




 
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