Greedo said:
Don't worry too much about it Freak_Boy you made the first step that a lot of other members including myself have yet to make and go along to one of the meet ups. I'm a bit shy like you by the sounds of it and I chickened out of one of the meets a few years ago, not something I want to have to do again so I would never put my name down again now. Glad people enjoyed themselves, and remember things can only get better. You'll probably enjoy the Alton trip a lot more now you have an idea of what its like
Just been flicking through some of the older posts I didn't read at the time, spotted this one. I imagine a few members feel similar. Don't be too put off attending meets - i'm fairly reserved/shy as I got the impression a couple of the other attendees were. The more outgoing people will always 'grab the headlines' as it were but that doesn't mean you should be put off. Even if there's some people you don't feel you can relate to, remember there's a wide range of people there some of whom probably feel similar to yourself. If somebody is sitting or walking on their own or whatever, chances are they will be happy to engage in conversation with you. It's not like a complete stranger (who in general I rarely approach), you've got at least one thing in common - you all post on ocuk. Or if there's a group of people discussing something, chip in every now and again, otherwise they probably assume you aren't interested and its not suprising they don't suddenly stop what they are doing to talk with you. As a shy person myself I know its easy to sit quietly feeling sorry for yourself, but its quite simply really; if you feel left out, part of the problem is that other people probably don't feel you want in.
I've only been to two meets and I've met members of all shapes and sizes, wide range of ages and appearance, both men and women - bound to be someone you can relate to. Likewise there may be times during the meet where you think "hmm, this activity isn't really my cup of tea". That's to be expected, not everyone likes the same stuff. You don't need to like clubbing or drink alchohol to have a good time - I've spoken to teetotallers who still had a good time at the meets.
Advice to meet virgins (no, I'm not talking about nighttime raids on catholic school dormitories!) - maybe travel some/all the way with another member who's been to one before. This lets you chat with them quite in depth along the way, get to know a lot about that person, and also learn a bit about some of the other people who are going to be there. It also helps having someone who can introduce you to the others - a lot less daunting that walking up to some big group of people, waiting for a lull in conversation and saying "er, hi, I'm TrApEzE_Rt1sT2004". I went to Swansea with Fox which was good as he knew quite a few of the attendees already. Also helps having two people to navigate etc!
