Todays bad joke

Shep_Cobain said:
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It was callled THE GULL

have another

THE ELEPHANT

An elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle asleep on a log. So, he ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river.

"What did you do that for?" Asked a passing giraffe.

"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk sixty two years ago."

"Wow, what a memory!" commented the giraffe.

"Yes," said the elephant: "Turtle recall".
 
a man was walking into a supermarket while a women was walking out,she dropped dead.

The bloke felt really sorry as she had just bought a bag for life.
 
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I don't normally post jokes because they're so bad, apologies.

3 sisters, Ann, Jan and Fanny all have very big feet. Ann has size 8, Jan size 9, Fanny size 10.
Ann and Jan go on a double date. 1 of the boys says "Man, you both have massive feet"
Ann replies "you should see our Fanny's, they're huge!!"

A couple driving home in the rain run over a badger. They get out and find it's still breathing but it's freezing cold.
The husband says "Put it between your legs to keep it warm". Wife says "but it's wet and stinky!". Husband says "well hold the badger's nose then!"

Last one I promise!!

Paddy goes into Superdrug and asks "Have you got KY Jelly?"
The assistant says "No, have you tried boots?"
Paddy replies "I want to slide in no ****in march in!!"
 
Barack Obama the worlds first black US president, Lewis Hamilton, the worlds first black forumla one champion, Will Smith the worlds highest paid actor, Tiger Woods, the worlds most successful golfer. How times change, it's a real good time to be black, poor old Michael Jackson must be kicking himself.

I can see I will have to give this joke it's own thread as it's in danger of getting missed by the masses.
 
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_dogma_ said:
I don't normally post jokes because they're so bad, apologies.

3 sisters, Ann, Jan and Fanny all have very big feet. Ann has size 8, Jan size 9, Fanny size 10.
Ann and Jan go on a double date. 1 of the boys says "Man, you both have massive feet"
Ann replies "you should see our Fanny's, they're huge!!"

A couple driving home in the rain run over a badger. They get out and find it's still breathing but it's freezing cold.
The husband says "Put it between your legs to keep it warm". Wife says "but it's wet and stinky!". Husband says "well hold the badger's nose then!"

Last one I promise!!

Paddy goes into Superdrug and asks "Have you got KY Jelly?"
The assistant says "No, have you tried boots?"
Paddy replies "I want to slide in no ****in march in!!"
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I LOL'd...ROFLCOPTER'd then laughed so loud whole office gave me a wierd look :D
 
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