Nothing that bad, just a bad day at the office for me and the organisers. On my phone so will fill in details when I get to a PC.
Edit: Ok, here's how it went.
Arrived in good time, registered and everything, all good. Ended up in the first wave so racked bike and what not. First problem was that the transition area was set up on an area of cracked and broken concrete and gravel. There were a load of carpet track rolls off to one side and we were promised that they would be out by the time we hit T1. Great, but that does't help us have to walk back barefoot to the swim start. Ouchy, ouchy, ouchy.
Quick swim / course brief and we are into the water. It's bleedin' cold. We are making out way to the start when the starter gun goes off and the guys at the front start swimming. Someone on the bank shouts that it's too early and everyone stops and starts making their way back to the line when another bang goes off. We all stop where we are and after about 5 seconds the starter shouts at use to get a move on. Hmm, brilliant skills, half the folks were still making their way from the entry steps and the other half were across the start line already.
I swam badly. I've neglected my swimming of late and it shows, but I'm still out of the water in the middle of the pack with my mate about 30s behind me. We run up the hill to the transition area and the carpets have been laid. Unfortunately they stop about 15m short of my bike, so again I have to run across gravel to get to my area. Not only that but having wet feet means that small stones and grit are transferred on my feet into my cycle shoes and I'm not wearing socks. Good job it's so cold that I can't actually feel my feet. The experienced guys who have their shoes already clipped in to their bikes are worse off because they have to run the 100m out of T1 in barefoot before they can mount, at least the rest of us can run that bit in out shoes!
Things don't improve. I get 100m on my bike and I realise I've punctured my front tyre on the gravel. I pull over and watch the rest of the wave go past as I change a tube. I manage to snap a lever and bend the valve in my haste. I also don't manage to find what caused the puncture so I actually end up with a serviceable but slowly softening tyre for the ride. Apart from that the ride is uneventful; I don't see many people but overtake a few since I'm a bit in no-mans land between waves. Couple of guys on TT bikes (a P3C and a Slice) from wave 2 I presume, breeze past me like I'm standing stil though.
I found out later that I wasn't the only one to get a puncture in T1
Run was uneventful, caught and passed my mate. Did see a few people lose their footing on the uneven ground though.
Finished in 1hr 24mins, nearly 15 minutes outside my target time. Looking back on it I had fun, especially since it was clear early on that I wasn't going to be setting any records, but I certainly shall not be parting with money for next year's Hever Castle Tri.