What would you do in this situation....

deuse said:
I have never been invited to a party\dinner and dance were I have had to pay.
Same goes for me if I invite people to my party they don't pay.

The only time I have paid is when we all knew it was a get together and we would pay for ourselves.
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Going for a meal in a restaurant is a bit different unless your definitions of a party\dinner and dance differ from mine
 
If it's as it was worded in the op, I would expect that the host is covering the cost. However, I would ensure that I had some cash just in case.
 
I would go expecting to pay for the meal. Unless specifically told "I'm treating my wife and our friends to a meal and am inviting you to come". Even then I'd probably expect to fork something out, like alcohol costs or something.

If I was told as you were in the OP that 20-30 people are turning up, I'd expect to be paying!
 
Seems a bit bizarre to invite someone to a meal and then expect them to pay, my birthday cost over £200 at the restaurant but we didn't expect the people we invited to pay for it!
 
'Going to a restaurant for a meal' = I expect to pay
'[Someone] is having a lunch/dinner at a restaurant' = I assume it will be paid for
 
zootfloot said:
Strange scenario here, but one that we have just been discussing at work and one that has me divided, here goes....

You and your wife receive a phonecall from an acquaintance telling you that it is his wife's 40th birthday coming up, to celebrate the fact they are going to a restaurant for a meal, there will be 20-30 people there.

You go for the meal and enjoy it, at the end of the meal a waitress brings out the bill and the gentleman who invited you to the meal states that the meal has come to X amount of pounds and it works out at £30.00 per person.

This has shocked both of you as you were expecting the inviter to pay for everyones meals, and as you turned up with this in mind you had very little cash on you, so had to loan some from other attendee's


The question is this, is it wrong of this couple to have expected this person to foot the bill?


My thoughts are that yes they were in the wrong, they only asked if they would like to come for a meal to celebrate his wife's birthday, they didnt invite them to a party.

This has completely split the office, half say yes they are wrong, they other half say no they werent wrong and the inviter should pay.

Whats your thoughts?
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Why would you go to a birthday dinner without no funds, better yet, why would you ASSUME that individual would pay for 20+ meals?

Stupidity on your part.
 
Energize said:
Seems a bit bizarre to invite someone to a meal and then expect them to pay...
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I've had worse....been invited to a wedding and reception and was expected to pay for my meal. To be fair it wasnt kept quiet that this was expected just though it out of the norm
 
britboy4321 said:
The punch tastes horrible so now you have no booze for the whole night and £15 shy in your back pocket. What is your reaction to 'birthday boy'?
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No reaction, the general assumption I'd go with is that I'm bringing alcohol to share and however that happens is fine by me. If no one else brought alcohol and just drank mine then I'd be a bit ticked off but c'est la vie.

As for the original question I'd go with money to pay regardless, depending on how well I knew the person and how the invitation was worded then I might have lesser expectations of paying but I'd always have the means to pay just in case. If however it was just an "acquaintance" then I'd a) be a bit surprised I was being invited to a special event and b) expect to pay as a matter of course. There may be subtle nuances depending on the cost and location etc but the broad expectation is that I would be paying and should be able to do so.
 
Rich_L said:
Go expecting to pay, be pleasantly surprised if you don't have to.
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This. I do know some of my friends over halfs dont pay for any drinks or meals because they dont think they have to :rolleyes: but I guess thats the choice of the sucker that accepts that raw deal. Equal rights means you pay half women..... oh no what have I said :D
 
Freefaller said:
Agreed. I'd never assume that someone is paying.
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This. Although if you knew it was going to be quite a big meal 20-30 people I think it's a bit unreasonable for the o/h to shell out £1500-3000 on a birthday meal!

My ex 'expected' me to pay for her half of a meal once, baring in mind we were both 17 and not exactly loaded. Normally I would have and wouldn't have a problem with it, being expected to pay for things isn't nice. At least having them offer to pay their way and then you insisting you can cover it all is nice. Even if they had no intent of paying for anything :p

I think to 'never expect anything' is fairly good advice.

My father always used to say in regards to driving 'always expect the unexpected'.
 
Abraham said:
Going for a meal in a restaurant is a bit different unless your definitions of a party\dinner and dance differ from mine
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As I have said If I invite people to a restaurant for a meal I will pay.
My party I invited them I pay simples.
But if it's just a get together then you pay for yourself.

As long as the people know before they go if they have to pay then they can make up their own mind to go or not.
 
The invitee should pay. It's like me asking one of you if you want a sandwich and then telling you the stuff is in the fridge go make it. In Latvia, where i come from, if you are invited to go somewhere the invitee pays.
 
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