Would you change your religion for a woman?

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Originally posted by Paras
i think you know as well as me that you would never find a greek girl like that. Very few girls worth having will leave there family for a man. Best you can hope for is that they give you there blessing if you get baptised,
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Ok, now that I'm not drunk anymore I can give you slightly better advice.

The thing is, the parents are just trying to do the best for their girl. For some unbeknown reason, a Greek Orthodox Greek is the best in their opinion. What you need to do is - or what I would do if I was you - firstly do not betray yourself or your culture or your religion. Stand up for what you are. Secondly, go to her place for a holiday and be yourself, show them what a great guy you are. It will be very difficult, and it may not work, but if you like her, you are going to hang in there :)
Of course, once (if) you have convinced her parents, then the whole game starts again with her grand parents, aunts, cousins, etc.:rolleyes: It is a constant battle, one in which you will see the good, the bad and the ugly of greek family life.
It is a real shame that Greek society is like that, but its been like this for over 2500 years, I don't see how it could change now tbh. It is probably linked to the idea that anything Greek is superior. It is a very narrow minded view to take, not everyone has that, but a lot of them do.
Bear in mind, this is my point of view, I do have a soft spot for our church even if I'm a theistic agnostic, I would never have my baptisation reversed, its part of my identity. In my personal view, someone that gives up part of their identity for any reason (even a woman) does not have enough cojones or backbone to stand up for themselves. Of course, if that part means nothing to them (you), then fair enough.

I hate it that I can not tell you something more positive, I hate the way our society is, but its the way it is and there are ways to succeed, but it will be a very stony and difficult road.

For perspective's sake, any marriage between Greek and foreigner is bound to have problems. My mate Tony, for example (Chris knows him), his mother is Dutch. Ever since his father married his mother, they have not been to his dad's village to meet their grandparents. Not hard to guess why. I also saw the kind of flak my mum received from her stupid sisters and her mum for leaving a Greek (even if he was a "villager") and marrying a German ( :eek: ), but my mum's cousins were completely different and supportive. What I found is, if parts of the family have lived/studied abroad, or perhaps even the parents themselves, they tend to be a lot more open-minded.

Reading through this, it doesn't really sound encouraging :p I'm sorry pal, I just try to paint a picture as realistic as possible. It is a hard fight, but it is worth fighting for. Just make sure you don't lose yourself along the way :)
 
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yep the above post sums up what all my friends have told me about Greek families. Its very much like Indian families. At least it’s a good few years before I have to think about it lol.

Btw sorry I did not make it to Prague (I don’t live in Prague anymore) to meet Chris so the next time I see her I will get her email.
 
Originally posted by Paras
yep the above post sums up what all my friends have told me about Greek families. Its very much like Indian families. At least it’s a good few years before I have to think about it lol.

Btw sorry I did not make it to Prague (I don’t live in Prague anymore) to meet Chris so the next time I see her I will get her email.
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No need to apologise mate :) Give her my email too, hopefully this way some kind of contact can be re-established :p

I hope you didn't quit medicine after all though :eek:
 
nop I did not quit in the end, I just transferred to anther university 200 km out of Prague in a place called Brno. Im much happier with the school there and did not loose any years.
 
Anyone who expects the person they to change their religion for them does not love that person enough. You are already telling person that you are not happy with who they are and that they must change something to be more acceptable to you. If you dont like the religion someone is dont marry them and dont force them to change. By asking some to change there religion for marriage means that you are trying to force that person into something and also put conditions on you marrying them.
 
nah not really, i dont do church or anything.. just not my bag

so they couldnt really make me change my religion

but i would probably end up going to a church or whatever that she wanted every so often, and i owuldnt protest too loudly, but then i wouldnt expect much volume from my singing in church either
 
Originally posted by Paras
Classic problem really, say you want to marry a girl and she is a different religion. If her family would want you to be baptised would you do it for her?

Or say you are christen and you have to become Muslim to marry your love.

Of course this is assuming you are not a particularly religious or devote person.
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If she loved you enough she wouldn't make you change your religion.
 
Depends how you value your religion and the woman in question.

A truely great woman shouldn't make you choose, but likewise you shouldn't force them to choose either.

-Dolph
 
I'm not religous although I've been Baptised CofE. Hence how can I say I believe something when I don't believe in.

I would, on the other hand, move countries if needed.

If she felt that she needed a church/religous marriage and that religous institution accepted non-believers to get married..

Really it all comes down to: Will it make you both happy?
 
Would those who strongly say no to this be willing to change other things? Stop drinking for example? Stop flirting with the office secretary? Join a health club? To some people, religion means nothing more than any of those changes. Calling myself christian or whichever religion, is not changing who I am in the slightest....

From the way Paras phrased the question, it sounds like its not a 'convert or we dont get married' thing, its more of a please do this to shut up my parents thing.
 
Originally posted by Balddog
Would those who strongly say no to this be willing to change other things? Stop drinking for example? Stop flirting with the office secretary? Join a health club? To some people, religion means nothing more than any of those changes.
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Actually, it means an awful lot more. I could stop drinking, although it's highly unlikely anyone would ask that big of a change from me. Joining a health club is nothing, it's just a small commitment and will do me good.

Contrast with changing religion. I don't believe there is a God, my decision has been made from the (lack of) evidence and facts available. It's not possible for me to become any other religion without lying or a very convincing piece of evidence coming to light. The former is not a good basis for a relationship and the latter hasn't ever happened.
 
I'm sorta with El Capitano on this. I'm against all forms of religion so there's no way I would join a religion for a girl.

To be honest, I'd probably spend that much time arguing with a devout follower that there'd be no relationship anyway :o I certainly wouldn't allow her/her family to poison the minds of my children.
 
Originally posted by Balddog
From the way Paras phrased the question, it sounds like its not a 'convert or we dont get married' thing, its more of a please do this to shut up my parents thing.
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yah more like that then anything else.

A truely great woman shouldn't make you choose, but likewise you shouldn't force them to choose either.
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But a man should not make her pick between him and her family.

If that was the only way to get her families blessing I would do it. Ok im Hindu but not a practicing Hindu so if i was baptised it would be something just for show to please her family I would not actually start following the religion or anything like that.
 
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For a woman its different:p I know a ukrainian girl whos converted to muslim... dresses like one and even goes to mosque and eats/learns the langauge.

And its just not right... peroid.

So id have to say regardless of sex/who u are, u gotta stay true to yourself, were adults anyhow and can see Religions just fake:p
 
have you sen the movie "my big fat greek wedding"???:D


honestly greek families are not as described as above. a hell lots of things have changed here and the society i would say has evolved the last 30 years. there are a few differences with the UK or France for example but thats natural as every nation has its own traditions and behaviour.

Paras i dont think you will have any difficulty in getting accepted in the greek family. You will be welcomed and people dont have any concerns on religious issues and stuff. i would say that her parents are mostly worried that their daughter may sometime move abroad for ever.

Cretan girls by the way are some of the most beautiful in Greece. personal experience:D
 
Originally posted by Gilly
I'm sorta with El Capitano on this. I'm against all forms of religion so there's no way I would join a religion for a girl.

To be honest, I'd probably spend that much time arguing with a devout follower that there'd be no relationship anyway :o I certainly wouldn't allow her/her family to poison the minds of my children.
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Saved me the effort of typing it myself, as it pretty much sums up what I would have said.
 
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