Permabanned
I can't stand scrambled eggs in the microwave. I find the cooking of scrambled eggs somewhat of a fine art to get them perfect (and completely cooked, hard and rubbery isn't my idea of perfect), this should be left to be done in a pan as it takes no longer than microwaving them anyway.
You're doing it wrong.
I very occasionally cook bacon in the microwave - it doesn't taste fantastic, but a bacon sandwich makes a half decent lunch if you're in a hurry (or too lazy to deal with the mess).
You're doing it very wrong.