Worst chat up lines you have ever heard

eXist · 9 Sep 2011 at 07:58

Have you ever been to Ireland?

because my penis is dublin!

/thread

[ASSE]Hinchy · 9 Sep 2011 at 08:18

Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk past again?

shoes · 9 Sep 2011 at 09:27

DefiantAsh said:
You got an erection for putting up a tent

Seriously?

roughlad · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:24

"Fancy going back to my place for pizza and a shag? No? Why not don't you like pizza"
"Do you like chicken? Good put this in your mouth its foul"

Cosimo · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:27

HypnoToad said:
I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.

You've got a USB stick. That doesn’t impress women.

Devrij · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:31

Reported from my gf, from a drunk old guy in a heavy galway accent:

"if I was a plane I'd land on ye!"

B@Th*nG · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:32

you don't sweat much for a fat bird

B@

Tefal · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:34

shoes said:
Seriously?

it's called comic effect.

Souleh · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:35

Have you got house insurance? Cause id like to smash your back doors in!

Guaranteed. (Maybe)

J86 · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:39

Far from the worst, I used to find these rather hilarious to use on a night out.

Are you a general? Cause my privates just stood to attention.

Do you work in subway? Cause you just gave me a foot-long.

Are you an official here? Cause you just officially gave me a boner.

kaffe · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:42

"Your drink is ****". Honestly, worked like a charm.

Tefal · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:42

kaffe said:
"Your drink is ****". Honestly, worked like a charm.

lol what did he follow up with?

Cosimo · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:44

Tefal said:
lol what did he follow up with?

Take a look at this.

kaffe · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:44

Tefal said:
lol what did he follow up with?

He disappeared for about ten minutes then came back and just asked for a dance. Ended up spending the rest of the night with him!

Tefal · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:45

simulatorman said:
Take a look at this.

I thought you were going to go with "try my own "brew" instead"

J86 · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:46

kaffe said:
He disappeared for about ten minutes then came back and just asked for a dance. Ended up spending the rest of the night with him!

You spent the night with him? :eek:

Tefal · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:46

kaffe said:
He disappeared for about ten minutes then came back and just asked for a dance. Ended up spending the rest of the night with him!

but not the morning?

what did he do, sneak out the window at 5 am?

HarryPainful · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:49

I used a pretty shocking one apparently.

I dated a girl about 5 years ago, she was 5`11" and had heels on, so 6`3" ish... I was stood next to her at the bar and I asked if she was stood on a box, I dont really remember much about it.

I was with her for over 2 years

trans Atlantic relationships are pretty tough.

kaffe · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:49

Tefal said:
but not the morning?

what did he do, sneak out the window at 5 am?

Noooo not like that! Jeeze you think so little of me!!!
We stayed out until about 4 and went our separate ways.

Also, just realised this is for the WORST chat up lines. So here is the worst I've heard.

Male: *extends arm* touch here.
Female: Okay... *touches arm*
Male: Do you know what that is?
Female: No, what?
Male: That's boyfriend material.

PiKe · 9 Sep 2011 at 10:50

kaffe said:
"Your drink is ****". Honestly, worked like a charm.

Struggling to fill in the blank, J*** ? :confused: