Parents irresponsible behaviour, I can't believe it.

It does raise an interesting sub topic with the recent case against the two footballers and that girl.

If they were all older and this happened, the girl could technically claim they raped her and ruin their lives for good.
 
krooton said:
And I'm not some old fuddy-duddy, I was 13 in 1995, and I just cannot even imagine anyone in my class having sex back then, we hadn't even started high school yet. Have a bf/gf and a snog and a grope, a few years later move on to fingerbanging and handjobs, then sex later still.
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I had a 'girlfriend' at 13, it basically equated to holding hands in the playground, a quick peck on the lips before break ended and that was that.
 
Telescopi said:
I mostly disagree that the order of responsibility goes mother>boys>girl.

The 'poor innocent girl' thing doesn't really wash with me, nor that the boys were only doing what comes naturally. They are people, not animals.

I don't like the excuse of alcohol either, it reduces inhibitions and trashes memory but it doesn't change your values. It's the excuse people give for fighting or sleeping around but studies have shown that people do the same things if they are told they are drinking alcohol but are in fact sober.

So while the mother is completely and utterly out of order I can't say the children involved are blameless either.
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I'd say more of the blame lies with the mothers. They should have educated the kids better. At the very least, they should have provided condoms and not any alcohol. I don't think alcohol was the only thing that made them have sex, but i think without it the experience would've been safer.

The kids IMO are as guilty as eachother. the parents get 99% of the blame. if not for providing the alcohol, then for not educating the children well enough.The OP said that the neice wasn't going to do anything about her baby. **** parenting right there.

paradisiac said:
she chose to drink all 6 though, if she felt in some way she was loosing control, she could have stopped at 2 or 3 beers?
there is such a thing as self control.
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at 13? Maybe, but not definitely IMO
 
shadesofgrey said:
Yeah, because. in general, children really do know when to stop right?
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Well at 13 they should have an idea of what happens when you are drunk, and that drinking alcohol can lead to that. Before they started drinking they were sober and made the choice to drink. They were not forced to drink it and they had the choice to simply not drink it, or not drink it all, but they chose to drink it until they got drunk.

I don't expect a 13 year old to have enough experience to fully understand how much alcohol will effect their body, or what their limits are, but I would expect a 13 year old to know what can happen if they do get drunk, and to be able to make the choice to not drink even if there is alcohol accessible to them.
 
krooton said:
Guess that's were all the view differ, I don't believe any child has the emotional maturity to deal with sex in the first 'official' year of their teens. Hell, they are only just starting puberty and will be having hormonal changes running rampant for a good few more years to come.
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Ah, i was talking more about late 13, closer to 14
 
Exactly.

But, this is why I feel the mother should be charged with something, because parents are meant to be responsible for their children.

In the footballers case, the only people to answer for it is themselves, being adults.
 
shadesofgrey said:
Exactly.

But, this is why I feel the mother should be charged with something, because parents are meant to be responsible for their children.

In the footballers case, the only people to answer for it is themselves, being adults.
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but the mother did not force them to drink it, so no law has been broken. who is to say the niece didnt tell her she had parental consent to drink, and as she is a smart decent girl, why would she lie?
not everything is black and white, and responsability cannot lay solely on the mother. the girl should know that alcohol is bad, if she doesnt, she shouldnt drink it. she should also no the implications. if infact she is saying that it was not what she wanted in any way (now she is sober) and that is was the drink that made her agree, then she needs to press charges for being coerced into it by the boys giving her drink. but i feel this has not happened, as she knows she is just as responsabile as the boys for their actions.
 
paradisiac said:
then she needs to press charges for being coerced into it by the boys giving her drink. but i feel this has not happened, as she knows she is just as responsabile as the boys for their actions.
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Which if that is what she is thinking, is an admirable quality in itself, and shows adult thinking.
 
who is to say the niece didnt tell her she had parental consent to drink, and as she is a smart decent girl, why would she lie?
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2nd hand info is not 1st hand info. She did not ask the mothers permission.
 
shadesofgrey said:
2nd hand info is not 1st hand info. She did not ask the mothers permission.
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well i have been reading up, and i cannot see anywhere that states you need the parents permission, just the carer (and not guardien). and in this case, whilst she was in the house of the other person, i believe she is the one taking duty of care over the neice, and she did give permission. but like i said, i cant find anything conclusive either way at the moment.

Drinking at home

It is not illegal for a person under 18 to drink alcohol at home or at a friend’s house. Parents can choose to give young people some of their own alcohol when at home.
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clicky

doesnt even mention there anything about consent from the parent of the child
 
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twist3d0n3 said:
3 teens got drunk of 6 beers? lightweights

e: damn it, 3x6 packs... still, lightweights
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Not sure on the can sizes, but say they were 330ml ones, you are looking at 3 pints per 13 year old, more than enough to get them drunk, and little enough to prevent puking and blackouts, so just the right amount of motor skills to do stupid things like have a three-way. :D
 
Cleeecooo said:
Was the alcohol specifically given to the children, or was it just left somewhere unattended
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it was bought specifically for the children, which shows a sign of stupidity, but thats about it.
i dont think everyone that gets drunk has sex. so she wasnt to know it would happen. i also cant see how any laws have been broken (although there might be one for not having parental consent, but i cannot find it, anywhere).

i do no condone what happened, but unless she wants to claim rape, or that she was coerced into drink with the aim of having sex, then i feel its something that needs to be put down to experience and thats about it. maybe better education on sex and alcohol in the future.
 
krooton said:
So you have no preference of her starting to have sex at 13 or 16, as long as she has safe sex?

I'd like to think I could raise my child to feel that 13 is too young, that they are not emotionally mature enough for all the things that sex brings to the table, and not have to worry about her being around other 13 years olds that will try it on.
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Given that in some countries, even 1st world ones such as Spain, that 13 is the age of consent, I feel that's fine.
 
krooton said:
Not sure on the can sizes, but say they were 330ml ones, you are looking at 3 pints per 13 year old, more than enough to get them drunk, and little enough to prevent puking and blackouts, so just the right amount of motor skills to do stupid things like have a three-way. :D
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yeah tipsy i guess; any more and it would've failed thanks to brewers droop :p
 
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