Thanks mate - Sleeping is a bugger at the moment as you can tell by my grammar lol, but I'm getting there.Grats - good luck in life and keep it going!
Suicide - why?
- Thread starter RetiredGreyFox
- Start date
Soldato
- Joined
- 6 Sep 2005
- Posts
- 3,783
I reported post 45 as I believe it fell within these guidelines: "Note: This is ONLY to be used to report spam, advertising messages, and problematic (harassment, fighting, or rude) posts."
I find it surprising that considering the context of the thread one of the mods doesn't consider his posts to fall into at least one of those categories.
I have kept quiet on this topic up to now as thankfully I don't have much experience in the matter.
All I can do is echo others comments that it can be the smallest trigger that sets it off and that it does come on in waves and if someone you know is in that mindset you can only hope that there is someone there when the wave hits.
It's a horrible horrible circumstance and will unfortunately probably remain explainable.
I find it surprising that considering the context of the thread one of the mods doesn't consider his posts to fall into at least one of those categories.
I have kept quiet on this topic up to now as thankfully I don't have much experience in the matter.
All I can do is echo others comments that it can be the smallest trigger that sets it off and that it does come on in waves and if someone you know is in that mindset you can only hope that there is someone there when the wave hits.
It's a horrible horrible circumstance and will unfortunately probably remain explainable.
I was prescribed Cilitropam and found them really helpful, even plucked up my confidence a bit and made me more outgoing. They make me feel tired at times now though and I still have odd days. But now that the anxiety/worry/etc is down a bit, I find I mostly just feel down/lonely because I am not out and doing stuff constantly or when I am in the house at the weekends. All this stuff I missed out on in my earlier years. I did want to talk to someone professionally at the time, to ask someone why I was feeling how I was. But it was too expensive for me, and if I went the GP route it would have went on record.
I try to take that "don't give a crap" attitude now when getting stuck into things and that, but it's still taking some time.
Yet again another walking talking abortion stands out in the OcUK ****** crowd.
Grow up you childish moron.
Soldato
- Joined
- 27 Mar 2004
- Posts
- 14,081
- Location
- Between Realities
I've never been able to get my head around suicide. I just cant see life as that bad, and i cant understand what would cause it to be bad.
I've broken up with girlfriends, people loved and not wanted to lose.
I've been in debt and jobless
I just cant grasp the concept of one of those reasons causing you to hurt yourself and end your life. Everything has a solution. Losing love hurts, but it gets better.
I just dont understand it.
I've broken up with girlfriends, people loved and not wanted to lose.
I've been in debt and jobless
I just cant grasp the concept of one of those reasons causing you to hurt yourself and end your life. Everything has a solution. Losing love hurts, but it gets better.
I just dont understand it.
Actually, he said "Takes more of a man to end his life than you are."
I'm not making any assumptions. If you really think that there's no option worse than suicide then I would have to wonder what's interfering with your judgement, because that is obviously not the case. And that's just covering the people who rationally decide to suicide...
There's no context here, and there's no absolute wrong or right.
Last edited:
One thing I've learnt, it sounds silly but - do not try, just do. For me another aspect was procrastination, procrastination only helps you stay where you are, it does not move you forward. I've been on different types of antidepressants over the years, but just decided with the support of my psychiatrist that coming off them would be a great idea... no problems whatsoever. The main one was my anti-psychotics Olanzapine (mood stabilizer), I came off them earlier in the year, for about two weeks after a couldn't stop crying, my psychiatrist said this is normal, then all of a sudden memories, feelings and urges came back to me, the most important thing was my thinking was clear, it was great! The quite ironic thing which made me laugh is that I have epilepsy and the tablets I'm on : Keppra, can give you depression and anxiety... can't bloody win
. Keep your chin up man, just do. Do not try.
Associate
- Joined
- 10 Aug 2012
- Posts
- 287
its such a selfish though and such a hard one to kik out off your heat the thoughts that everything you ever done is a failure and everything you will do will be a failure and the world and all you know will flourish without you some people just cant find a link to something elce and get it out off there head i suppose and it never ends good =[
Not necessarily. For me, there was no way out. It was only by a seriously fortunate set of circumstances I'm still here.
Occasionally I find myself slipping back into that mindset but I've developed a few safety nets that catch me. If those ever fail.....
Associate
- Joined
- 10 Aug 2012
- Posts
- 287
Not necessarily. For me, there was no way out. It was only by a seriously fortunate set of circumstances I'm still here.
Occasionally I find myself slipping back into that mindset but I've developed a few safety nets that catch me. If those ever fail.....
gota say its probably one off the best ways to deal with the "voices in your head" kind off thing but make sure your safety nets had safety nets!
no matter how bad you have it some one some here has it wore it always makes me think that line and helps me get back on the right train to recovery!
My mother killed herself, by hanging. She had made numerous attempts (I would actually have an issue remembering how many). I expect its meant to be embarrassing, cringe worthy or possibly something you shouldn't talk about but to be honest I think it should be talked about more. Suicide is a societal taboo.
There are a couple of possible ways you can deal with it. You can spend a long time wondering whether it was you and fixating on the things you might have done. You can even wonder if you might have some sort of pre destination in that way yourself. I felt like that when I was much younger.
Or you can form the view that people are in control of their own lives and whatever anyone does there are going to be times when the person has and exercises ultimate control. I honestly feel like that now. Whatever I did she would have killed herself and it wasn't actually ever about me. Of course it wasn't and it feels slightly silly to have thought like that but of course when you are a kid everything is about you.
It's pointless to label suicide selfish or pointless or take the mickey out of it..the person who does it isn't impacted by any of that and the people left behind simply feel worse.
It's a really sad thing to happen to anyone's friends and family and I feel sorry for anyone impacted by it.
There are a couple of possible ways you can deal with it. You can spend a long time wondering whether it was you and fixating on the things you might have done. You can even wonder if you might have some sort of pre destination in that way yourself. I felt like that when I was much younger.
Or you can form the view that people are in control of their own lives and whatever anyone does there are going to be times when the person has and exercises ultimate control. I honestly feel like that now. Whatever I did she would have killed herself and it wasn't actually ever about me. Of course it wasn't and it feels slightly silly to have thought like that but of course when you are a kid everything is about you.
It's pointless to label suicide selfish or pointless or take the mickey out of it..the person who does it isn't impacted by any of that and the people left behind simply feel worse.
It's a really sad thing to happen to anyone's friends and family and I feel sorry for anyone impacted by it.
I think broadly speaking, that's the point.
I am sure you are right and that's why people say it but it is still something to say that does no good to anyone much and I doubt anyone thinking of killing themselves would respond to it anyway.
For me it wasn't a voices in the head thing at all.
It was calculated, borne of perfectly sensible thought processes and done in quite a cold, structured way.
I sat down and essentially made a balance sheet. When I realised I had no reasons left to live, and no reasons left not to kill myself, I made the decision and that was that.
Associate
- Joined
- 4 Sep 2011
- Posts
- 596
Dimple. This isn't going to be easy for me but I feel compelled to contribute to this thread. I will honour your request and simply answer with the experience of suicide not relating to a family member or friend, but myself.
I am 28 years of age, have a cracking job as an Electrician, live at home so have no major outgoings etc and I am relatively fit and healthy. However, and I refer to a post made earlier by Kwerk and I will second this.
I sometimes feel that I do not have the "energy" or "Spiritual energy" to carry on. It is very difficult to describe and it can come on all of a sudden. It can be very powerful and no matter how hard you try to block it out, it's always there.
Maybe I'm just weak but if my circumstances change or I feel really down about my life as a whole then yes, and I am not ashamed to admit it, I have felt Suicidal. More than once.
But, this isn't about me. It's about you and I can only suggest that your Nephew, for what ever reason lost that energy or that will to carry on. Now, I am of the opinion that suicide is not so much selfish but it is an act of great courage because he would have known full well that he was going to end his life and that was obviously his intentions.
I am not by any means though saying that you should not feel bitter or angry towards him for putting yourself and your family through this misery. It is merely my opinion that it is more of an act or courage not selfishness.
There is a saying that "A Suicider dies once but their family dies a thousnad times over trying to figure out why it happened".
You may never understand why it happened and you may put the pieces of the puzzle together, only to be unsatisfied with the answer. I wish you well.
I am 28 years of age, have a cracking job as an Electrician, live at home so have no major outgoings etc and I am relatively fit and healthy. However, and I refer to a post made earlier by Kwerk and I will second this.
I sometimes feel that I do not have the "energy" or "Spiritual energy" to carry on. It is very difficult to describe and it can come on all of a sudden. It can be very powerful and no matter how hard you try to block it out, it's always there.
Maybe I'm just weak but if my circumstances change or I feel really down about my life as a whole then yes, and I am not ashamed to admit it, I have felt Suicidal. More than once.
But, this isn't about me. It's about you and I can only suggest that your Nephew, for what ever reason lost that energy or that will to carry on. Now, I am of the opinion that suicide is not so much selfish but it is an act of great courage because he would have known full well that he was going to end his life and that was obviously his intentions.
I am not by any means though saying that you should not feel bitter or angry towards him for putting yourself and your family through this misery. It is merely my opinion that it is more of an act or courage not selfishness.
There is a saying that "A Suicider dies once but their family dies a thousnad times over trying to figure out why it happened".
You may never understand why it happened and you may put the pieces of the puzzle together, only to be unsatisfied with the answer. I wish you well.
I doubt they were sensible thought processes (it's not sensible or rational to kill yourself under the majority of conditions probably the only one where it is is when you are terminally ill with no prospect of recovery etc), but then, that's rationalisation for you.
i have read a few things on suicide, and all of them seem to point one direction.
imbalance in the chemical make up of the brain, people who commit suicide are 'differant' to you and I. That is someone who wouldnt dream of it.
from what i could gather from my reading, suicides like your nephews, are the most common.
the person can be happy, everything to live for etc, but something 'switches' in the brain, so that killing oneself seems as natural as having a shower, or eating dinner, and the smallest thing usually invokes this feeling.
these suicides usualy, dont have a note to explain. as there is simply nothing, to explain.
he/she have just decided to get 'off the bus' as there stop has arrived.
i fear your search for answers will be futile, and hope someday you can see past the 'understanding' of this terrible tradegy to you and yours.
imbalance in the chemical make up of the brain, people who commit suicide are 'differant' to you and I. That is someone who wouldnt dream of it.
from what i could gather from my reading, suicides like your nephews, are the most common.
the person can be happy, everything to live for etc, but something 'switches' in the brain, so that killing oneself seems as natural as having a shower, or eating dinner, and the smallest thing usually invokes this feeling.
these suicides usualy, dont have a note to explain. as there is simply nothing, to explain.
he/she have just decided to get 'off the bus' as there stop has arrived.
i fear your search for answers will be futile, and hope someday you can see past the 'understanding' of this terrible tradegy to you and yours.
- Joined
- 29 Mar 2003
- Posts
- 57,974
- Location
- Blurton
24 hours and 12 hours before his death.
He doesn't look like he's got a care in the world and just doesn't make sense.
He doesn't look like he's got a care in the world and just doesn't make sense.
Whether rational or not, the equation was a simple one. Not existing was the best option. The decision was an easy one.
Looking back, I am of course glad that my ex forgot her keys that evening as I'm part way through an amazing journey that continues to surprise me. It feels good to be alive, to actually feel things and have emotion other than pure despair and anguish, or just numbness.
*edit - I've had to sacrifice an awful lot to be able to live though. An awful lot, and sometimes that's the stumbling block that makes me doubt things. But I have my mechanisms to help me through those patches and things are gradually getting better
Last edited:
24 hours and 12 hours before his death.
He doesn't look like he's got a care in the world and just doesn't make sense.
It is very sad
Out of curiosity, what music did he listen to? I'm of the opinion that the miserable find refuge in miserable music.