Soldato
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had that happen to me before, and the guy owed me money
ditch 'em both and move on, no point associating with asshats like that
The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread
- Thread starter mattyprice4004
- Start date
had that happen to me before, and the guy owed me money
ditch 'em both and move on, no point associating with asshats like that
Depends on the 'ex-ness' of your ex really - someone you'd dated a few weeks/couple of months isn't really a big deal, it's not likely you'd have become super attached and deeply in love but moving in on someone after a several year relationship is a no go area tbh.
Soldato
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My girlfriends ex is a friend of a friend, the kind of person you'd speak to but not really socialise with outside work. I set them up originally when I was with my ex, they were only together about 6 weeks. I don't really see the problem as it was such a short lived relationship, felt bad to start with though as I introduced them to each other - wouldn't have met her otherwise though.
Neo..
Let it be said that everyone who gave me advice back in November through to the New year were 110% correct. (Go back through Decembers postings in this very thread to read)
YOU CANNOT FIX CRAZY..
Get out and run away for your own sanity..
Let it be said that everyone who gave me advice back in November through to the New year were 110% correct. (Go back through Decembers postings in this very thread to read)
YOU CANNOT FIX CRAZY..
Get out and run away for your own sanity..
Associate
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had this done to me this month, me ex of 4 years and close friend i used to go out into town with
my ex told me, after i had heard rumours about them, i also asked the "friend" and they lied straight to me about it, then 1 hour later my ex told me....
the really hurtful thing was, my ex new it hurt me, and she knew i wanted to be with her more than anything still, yet she carried on meeting him....
annoying thing is, me and this friend where part of a group of lads, now i appear to have lost the group aswell due to this :/
just shows some people really arent true friends!
That one I left in the New year, the one with Bi-Polar, she was a mates ex.. Meh, he left her and moved up north somewhere.
He did find out and was all bitter about it too but meh. It's not like I steamed in there while they were together.
She came to me after he left..
He did find out and was all bitter about it too but meh. It's not like I steamed in there while they were together.
She came to me after he left..
Yeah I think it's a bit BS. Sure having known where a girls been would probably make be a bit less interested, but I think if someone fits well enough and it's been over long enough, you shouldn't feel bad about having a crack at it. Sure theres a question of "long enough" and I wouldn't jump in weeks after a break up.
I didn't speak to a good mate for 10 years because of something like that. Is all ok now though. Plus he regretted ever getting involved with her as she totally did his head in... He told me couple of years ago that I was right, along with everyone else who said to stay away from her lol.
Hehe, crazy years in my 20's. The 'she' in question now has 4 kids by 2 different fathers (my mate included); the other 3 are with another mate of mine who is now an alcoholic.
Was all terribly important at the time, but I think I dodged the bullet there
Why are some people so ****ing clueless when it comes to what's good for them in relationships? Need to vent here a bit.
I've got a good female friend I shared a house with many years ago when I was a young pup in my early 20's. She's not a particularly pretty girl (a bit overweight) or have a great personality, but she's a genuinely good person who'll give you her last penny if you need it.
She's always been in long term relationships up until about 4 years ago. She's my age; 32. So she's been single for, you guessed it, 4 years. She's had the odd one night stand (she says) and week fling here or there, but nothing serious. She's been boyfriend hunting for years now without luck. Towards the end of last year she went to Kenya for on holiday and met a local taxi driver who asked her to marry him 5 days into knowing her. She considered it when she got back to the UK for a good month
It took some of us getting her mum and sister up to London to talk sense into her. This guy also asked her to carry a suitcase back to Kenya. No, I'm not making this up.
Apparently she's incapable grasping the fact that some people want to get to Europe and are on the lookout for overweight single desperadoes to help them get here.
Fast forward to January, taxi guy forgotten. She meets this African guy (nice fella too) who asked to move in with her on their second date. She says yes. The short of it; he's asked to move out a month later after stealing from her and refusing to receive any of her family or friends in 'his' house.
This brings us nicely to, well, yesterday. Where we met up with a drink with another friend of ours. She had another date (3rd in 4 years from online dating. She reckons she's on a roll), or rather 3rd date, and this crazy weirdo MOFO asked her to move in with him and she said yes
This woman sits there beaming with a idiotic look on her face as she waits for us to congratulate her on another hair brained idea.
It's almost as if ALL sense deserts her when a man so much as look at her in a positive way.
I'm not asking for advice as I wouldn't know how to talk to Stupid anyway. Apparently logic can't be used when it comes to matters of the heart
I've got a good female friend I shared a house with many years ago when I was a young pup in my early 20's. She's not a particularly pretty girl (a bit overweight) or have a great personality, but she's a genuinely good person who'll give you her last penny if you need it.
She's always been in long term relationships up until about 4 years ago. She's my age; 32. So she's been single for, you guessed it, 4 years. She's had the odd one night stand (she says) and week fling here or there, but nothing serious. She's been boyfriend hunting for years now without luck. Towards the end of last year she went to Kenya for on holiday and met a local taxi driver who asked her to marry him 5 days into knowing her. She considered it when she got back to the UK for a good month
It took some of us getting her mum and sister up to London to talk sense into her. This guy also asked her to carry a suitcase back to Kenya. No, I'm not making this up. Apparently she's incapable grasping the fact that some people want to get to Europe and are on the lookout for overweight single desperadoes to help them get here.
Fast forward to January, taxi guy forgotten. She meets this African guy (nice fella too) who asked to move in with her on their second date. She says yes
. The short of it; he's asked to move out a month later after stealing from her and refusing to receive any of her family or friends in 'his' house. This brings us nicely to, well, yesterday. Where we met up with a drink with another friend of ours. She had another date (3rd in 4 years from online dating. She reckons she's on a roll), or rather 3rd date, and this crazy weirdo MOFO asked her to move in with him and she said yes
This woman sits there beaming with a idiotic look on her face as she waits for us to congratulate her on another hair brained idea.
It's almost as if ALL sense deserts her when a man so much as look at her in a positive way.
I'm not asking for advice as I wouldn't know how to talk to Stupid anyway. Apparently logic can't be used when it comes to matters of the heart
Oh dear. I hope I won't be like that when I get to the age of 32
YOU'RE ALREADY LIKE THAT.
Associate
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I dont understand how someone that used to say they loved you more than anything blah blah and have been with for nearly 4 years.... can be so ok with hurting you? whilst full well knowing how you feel towards that person and that you are hurt!!
now for me, as a person, if i knew what i was doing was hurting someone that i used to love, i would not be ok with seeing them hurt, regardless of how i felt, i would still want to make sure that said person was doing ok, and not pile on more stuff to hurt them and just be plain horrible to them! and i would still be considerate to their feelings!
i just dont understand how someone can be ok with hurting someone they used to love...
now for me, as a person, if i knew what i was doing was hurting someone that i used to love, i would not be ok with seeing them hurt, regardless of how i felt, i would still want to make sure that said person was doing ok, and not pile on more stuff to hurt them and just be plain horrible to them! and i would still be considerate to their feelings!
i just dont understand how someone can be ok with hurting someone they used to love...
Oh please. I have plenty of admirers
I'm a single man now Mischief. I've realised that girls with too many piercings (Like more than 10) really aren't for me.
I can purchase shoes for you as I know you like that kind of thing. I have three dogs.. two cats and a variety of Dairy Cattle at your disposal.
You can pet them, hug them etc. Email in trust. Much love. Blesses. Arek
So you're ok with 7 piercings?
I've sent you a trust message xxx
Instead of filling up the internet dating thread with my sob story thought I'd post in here mainly because I honestly forgot something very important to mention... my girlfriend suffers from borderline personality disorder! I'll try and keep it as short and to the point as I can so here's a brief summary of my situation;
Met a girl on Plenty of Fish back in December and we started going out properly just after christmas. Everything has been great except from the odd day when she's been a bit up and down working herself up thinking I might leave her for no reason(common symptom of bpd) or rather it was great until Tuesday just gone! An ex from a year and a half ago sent her a random txt last week out of the blue saying he wants her back and not only was this ex apparently a right **** to her when they were together, she's actually decided she's still not over him and wants time to think if she wants him or me! The worst thing is she told me she loved me last Thursday which is obviously a big step in a relationship and I've done nothing but treat her like a princess so to be put on a shelf while she weighs me up against her ex is damn insulting as I'm sure you'll agree! Here is a summary of bpd by the way;
"Persons with BPD are often uncertain about their identity. As a result, their interests and values can change rapidly. They also tend to view things in terms of extremes, such as either all good or all bad. Their views of other people can change quickly. A person who is looked up to one day may be looked down on the next day. These suddenly shifting feelings often lead to intense and unstable relationships.
Other symptoms of BPD include:
•Intense fear of being abandoned
•Cannot tolerate being alone
•Frequent feelings of emptiness and boredom
•Frequent displays of inappropriate anger
•Impulsiveness, such as with substance abuse or sexual relationships
•Repeated crises and acts of self-injury, such as wrist cutting or overdosing"
Now I know this is GD so I'm prepared for the "bitch be crazy", "run a mile" etc, but has anyone got some sound advice for me or better yet some one who has also been with someone who has bpd, bi polar or similar illness?
I know I should turn and walk away, but this means too much to me so I want to fight tooth and nail to stop her doing something stupid because I know how happy she was, but with her going through a little bad patch, stressing out over moving house and that txt from her ex all coming at once seems like the worst luck ever
Thanks.
Tells you she loves you, a few days after doesn't know if she wants you or an ex? Nip it in the bud and steer clear dude!