Talk slower, I have no problems understanding you (I talk very quickly myself) but I assume you're aiming for a wide audience here.
Edit: That's for the 3 minute version, you could have saved the extra time by making sure you didn't try things like pinch to view all home screens etc.
Edit 2: Watched the full review and have some notes.
Plan the review better in both versions (e.g. light demo in full video, going back and forth between topics in both videos)
Mention that the battery works well because of the new 4.4 optimisations and low powered chips for audio, enveloping etc
Comment on one handed usability
Power button rattle (I think I heard yours rattle in the review)
The desk wobble issue can be fixed with a case
Double speaker grill but only one speaker (the other is a mic)
Mention no IPS polarizer (the reason you get IPS glow for dark screens at 45 degree angles at night)
OIS impact shots in the dark, not the size of the sensor which is average
No mention of Qi magnets to align while charging
You mention hardware specs but don't mention how it compares to the competition
Stop playing Eminem, it's pants

Google have mentioned about fixing the camera in a future software update
Comment on call quality/volume both ways
In other launchers you can still access Google now by holding the home key
Were there any lock screen widget changes in 4.4?
Mention it uses a micro sim and has no SD card option
Mention Google apps changes in 4.4
I don't think you need to go into so much detail about how you messed the phone up in the review
NLED is important to a lot of people, and has a nice scatter glow and range of colours to it, sort that out in the review!