Life just took a divebomb - 8 Years down the pan.

robfosters said:
People seem to forget that wanting to beat someone up does not necessarily mean you can.

You could end up in the most horrific situation whereby he has your girlfriend and has given you a good towelling, which would no doubt get round work and leave you emotionally defunct.
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If you take it laying down. You get back up and go again until he murmurs that you are not a man and are made of steel. And then in the final round you KO him. The initial pasting is just the opening blow in the end the crowd will cheer his name not the woman rustler.
 
Rofflay said:
If you take it laying down. You get back up and go again until he murmurs that you are not a man and are made of steel. And then in the final round you KO him. The initial pasting is just the opening blow in the end the crowd will cheer his name not the woman rustler.
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Does this happen before or after you wash Mr Miyagi's car?
 
I haven't read the thread if i'm honest, but it seems like people are actually advocating fighting the man in question?

I just thought i'd say this is the stupidest and worst way to deal with the thing like this for the following reasons:
  • Doing so could affect your job, no broad is worth risking your job for.
  • In my opinion, if a girl is willing to do something like this, she isn't worth having anyway.

Even if she did come back mate, i'd tell her the damage is done. From experience of a girlfriend cheating on me, the trust will never be there ever again, you're much better off coming out next weekend and smashing bare slutskis in Qube :p
 
LOAM said:
Does this happen before or after you wash Mr Miyagi's car?
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After, The car washing and wooden deck sanding is obviously a pre cursor. It might take months of prep to get the op into fighting shape. OP what are this chumps vitals? Height and weight roughly?

I haven't read the thread if i'm honest, but it seems like people are actually advocating fighting the man in question?

I just thought i'd say this is the stupidest and worst way to deal with the thing like this for the following reasons:

Doing so could affect your job, no broad is worth risking your job for.
In my opinion, if a girl is willing to do something like this, she isn't worth having anyway.


Even if she did come back mate, i'd tell her the damage is done. From experience of a girlfriend cheating on me, the trust will never be there ever again, you're much better off coming out next weekend and smashing bare slutskis in Qube
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And go home and cry in the corner afterwards. No what he needs to do is take the others guys jeeb. Think about it an over qualified train driver you can push him out somehow. And then when thier financial chips are down and thier sex life is on the rocks you can move in with leather gloves and chloroform. Get him in the boot and drive him to an empty field and get pills and whisky into his belly and a soppy note about how his ex was a bitch.


Then you can finally go in and help her "Grieve" And tell her how much of a mistake he was. And while you are smashing that pasty every night his soul will be tormented that you have his jeeb and girl. If you really want to rub it in you could obviously dig up his skull and hollow out a cup to drink chilled red wine on his anniversary. That is what i call revenge, Or you could just go do slutski in Qube. Should it go to a poll?
 
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David_VI said:
Yeah i'm that guy who wrote the essay on how he got his dream job as a train driver.. Life just... all over you right?

I felt I had to get this out somewhere and GD seems a good place.

I've been with my girlfriend 8+ Years. We had our ups and downs, nothing drastic, never argued. Both quite messed up people with depression and such.

Anyhow, after what I thought was an amazing week with her I get home from my shift (1830-2am) to find the house quite empty and a note. The note is two sides of A5 in large 1cm writing, in other words nothing of substance, including the line "I could write for pages but it would be pointless" (so not going to tell me why eh?) and "It's over and i'm not coming back, don't try to contact me".

Rewind to a week and a bit earlier.. I know shes been talking to a guy from work, not really hidden it per se, I was aware they're friends. But at some point while sitting in bed I saw her talking to him on facebook in corner of my eye.. So I ask, "who you talking to?" And she tells me someone else.

So naturally back in the present, this guy is a prime suspect. I used to work where she now works and worked closely with a guy who is good friends with the guy in question. I spoke to him and he said his friend had previously talked about liking someone and its complicated. My friend also phones the guy and asks why he wasn't at work "I'm off sick and driving to the lake district with 'a mate'".. All adds up right?


Anyway you get the drift. I am a wreck. Not sleeping, not eating, feel permenantely sick. Constantly thinking...
The fact she couldn't even tell me the truth, I am still left with unanswered questions. Sure fine for her but what about me here, when someone writes "Don't try to contact me" Do they seriously think after 8 years you'l be like.. oh fair enough, you're gone.. I'll just get on with it. As well as going on as normal together, especially the last week where we spent way more time together, playing games, going out, she recieved a few gifts from me and some of the best sex ever, even upto the last night.. It makes no sense to me :( Seems out of the blue but something like this has to be planned, moving furniture between 1830-2am from a second floor flat!?

I'm quite a loner, I such at maintaining friendships but damn I need them now. Definately feel alone. Just had to get this out because I really don't have many people to talk to at all.

I would post more because i'm really struggling, i'm barely independent and now I have to learn, I can't afford to live here alone among other things but i'll wait for replies..
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Really sorry to hear what you're going through. I know it probably won't help a awful lot but this kind of thing (unfortunately) happens to quite a lot of us.

On the positive side you have an awesome job, and you can concentrate on that and to pick you up. The way your ex handled things is completely wrong, but lets face it - you dodged a bullet there by the sounds of things.

You got a big step up career wise and at some point you'll get a big step up girlfriend wise. You'll come out of this better than you think.
 
Rofflay said:
After, The car washing and wooden deck sanding is obviously a pre cursor. It might take months of prep to get the op into fighting shape. OP what are this chumps vitals? Height and weight roughly?




And go home and cry in the corner afterwards. No what he needs to do is take the others guys jeeb. Think about it an over qualified train driver you can push him out somehow. And then when thier financial chips are down and thier sex life is on the rocks you can move in with leather gloves and chloroform. Get him in the boot and drive him to an empty field and get pills and whisky into his belly and a soppy note about how his ex was a bitch.


Then you can finally go in and help her "Grieve" And tell her how much of a mistake he was. And while you are smashing that pasty every night his soul will be tormented that you have his jeeb and girl. If you really want to rub it in you could obviously dig up his skull and hollow out a cup to drink chilled red wine on his anniversary. That is what i call revenge, Or you could just go do slutski in Qube. Should it go to a poll?
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Wow...just wow! I was actually about to post something along the lines of "these are some of the most sensible responses I've ever seen in GD" and then this. That is just astounding work sir :D

Anyhow OP, there are some great pieces of advice on this thread. The main one being, please don't try and make a play to win her back. Getting emotional is probably likely, but avoid it. I've done it and I regretted it almost immediately and nearly every day since. One of the worst ******* things I've ever done.

The world's your oyster now, do what you want. From your previous thread it seems you're also in the enviable position of having a job you enjoy so throw yourself into it - do any overtime offered. It'll take your mind off things and give you more cash to splash on things you enjoy.
 
The only person you should be punching is her... preferably in the ovaries.


More seriously, this is the best advice.

"Married: No
Kids: No
Great, well paid job: Yes
Move on. "

Don't text, don't plead for answers, don't rant and rage at the other bloke, just move on.
Put in some over time, go for a run, lift some weight. Feel the endorphins and then feel better about yourself and that you dodged a bullet from such a heartless cow.

And for reference we do have a thread on relationship break ups if that helps ;)
 
This happened to my brother a couple years ago, and if it weren't for their two kids I would have said to drop her like a hot coal. Things with them are particularly rough after several episodes of her using him as a support when she realized she was out of her depth. I think he is only just beginning to realize he needs to move on and leave his marriage behind him.

So I say to you, unless you have kids that require you to maintain a civil relationship, avoid all of that heartache and realize that anyone who is willing to move their **** out and leave a note saying not to contact them does NOT deserve anything from you. Especially not your headspace. While this is a big upset and changes a lot of things that have seemed constant over the last 8 years, you should see this as "thank god this didn't happen 5 years from now". There is no coming back from this. You won't ever rebuild a good relationship with her, so if she comes crawling back if the new guy doesn't work out for her, you need to resist the urge to take her back. If she had sat down and discussed it, explained she had just developed feelings etc, that's different. But she didn't. Pull the ripcord and start a new life with someone else. Or just enjoy some freedom for a while first while you rebuild your self confidence.

I'm not trying to downplay how much this must hurt for you right now (It has killed me watching my bro go through it), but I hope you can get through it quickly and start enjoying your life again :)
 
Pawnless Endgame said:
One of my best mates is a newly qualified train driver. He started on £29k and top of the payband is £37k. Not to be sniffed at of course, but you're a bit off the mark with £50k!
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The company I work for, you start as a depot driver at 25k then you go up mainline after anytime from few months to three years. Then you're on 44k but with Sundays probably 50k thereabouts.
 
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David_VI said:
The company I work for, you start as a depot driver at 25k then you go up mainline after anytime from few months to three years. Then you're on 44k but with Sundays probably 50k thereabouts.
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Young, single, well paid job...you have some serious pulling potential young man. Take advantage of it.
 
David_VI said:
The company I work for, you start as a depot driver at 25k then you go up mainline after anytime from few months to three years. Then you're on 44k but with Sundays probably 50k thereabouts.
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Heck, even I'm attracted to you now. :cool:
 
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