The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

agnes said:
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You said you had a few days off. So you could have said that you would spend one day gaming and going out with your mates, and then the next day doing something with her?

The whole idea from a relationship is compromise between each other and not be selfish. Obviously don't give in to all demands from the gf :p
 
Flipt said:
You said you had a few days off. So you could have said that you would spend one day gaming and going out with your mates, and then the next day doing something with her?

The whole idea from a relationship is compromise between each other and not be selfish. Obviously don't give in to all demands from the gf :p
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I did compromise, I came back 4 days earlier from Europe, spent 3 days in a row with her, one of which at Harry Potter tours, the other doing other stuff and the other watching films.

Sorry, forgot to mention that.
 
MisChief said:
You're the only two people trying to 'make sense' of what I'm saying. You don't want to genuinely 'understand' anyway. It's clear you're both just questioning for the sake of questioning.
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They aren't, they're just the only ones who can be bothered to make posts to do so. What they are questioning makes a lot of sense, you've ended a relationship on the Sunday and planned your next date on the Monday. That's an extremely bold/risky move for someone who clearly cared about the last guy.

Just be careful, you've admitted yourself you are an emotional person so people are trying to help you avoid messy situations.
 
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We argue about stupid things all the time, it's normal. Less arguing actually, more bickering. The latest installments of bicker? Over where either of us wanted a piece of furniture placed in the living room and then also over whether we left the meat grinder on the kitchen work top or in the cupboard... Yes really :p... Of course we realise the bickering is over the top and ridiculous after we've calmed down and had sexy times. Until the next round.

Perfectly normal if you ask me (so long as you hate **** one another after).

Semi srs
 
I would HATE being a in a relationship with constant bickering or arguments, had one in the past and it sapped the will to live from me.
 
We don't have the toilet seat issue. I have the novelty of my first ever slow close lid, so I always take great joy in closing it. Also, flush with lid open =germs all over the room, also we have cats, so I don't fancy them falling in there lol!

The choosing food argument is a classic for all I believe. Except they got the sexes the wrong way round. The girl always seems to be the one to say "I don't mind, let's have whatever you want". Then you make a decision and she says "oh, I don't want that!"...... ME=ACTUAL RAGE.
 
krooton said:
I would HATE being a in a relationship with constant bickering or arguments, had one in the past and it sapped the will to live from me.
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This is so accurate it's crazy.

All my mates have made comments over the past several months about me being lifeless, miserable, recluse and generally not happy and always looking exhausted.

Anyway, I just got back... It's done, tears from both sides, she wanted to fight until the end of the world if it meant it would eventually work. I didn't... So yea, I gave up on us.

I'm regretting it now, I'm a little bit of a mess. But I will see how I feel this weekend.
 
NVP said:
:( Feel sad. I ended it last week but I've had time to think back and I now feel such a fool. I couldn't trust her and I think that tainted every moment we had together. I look back on how I handled certain things and I think, why did I act like that? She gave me no reason to! But then the sanity slips through the clouds in my mind and I remember the reason for ending it, she tried to play me for a fool... but did she?! Aarrgg!! My friends are no help, they pretty much tell me 'what did I expect from a girl like her?' Maybe I'm too naive, I did not see what they saw, what everyone else saw, I just saw a girl trying to take control of her own life. But perhaps they were right? I thought it was simply ignorance on their part but I guess it was I who was being ignorant. Blinded by her kisses.

The thing is, now I'll never know if it was my distrust from the beginning which led us down this path... or were my friends right, was she at it from the beginning and there was never a future at all? This is the killer. This is the part I can't stop thinking about.

I'm not sure why I'm posting this. I don't even want a reply, I think I just need to release.
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I know how that feels, i would listen to your friends as people looking from the outside are usually right, but if you feel like you couldn't trust her then you have to ask yourself what sort of relationship you were in, i am guessing you felt fine when you were with her and utterly low when you were not ? that kind of carry on can drive a man insane. It gets to the point where nothing she says will make you feel better for any length of time.

I am seeing a girl i posted about several pages ago and i get some of the similar feelings and they drive me utterly crazy, and there over stupid things, but we are only seeing each other once a week so it feels like its time to say goodbye again before we ever get chance to have a meaningful chat and about a month into seeing each other she flipped out at me asking her to be my girlfriend and i dread a repeat of that.. she seems to also have major issues with any sort of advertising of our relationship on facebook as well and as i said recently turned down going away to pursue her "acting opportunities" but insists its not her neglecting the relationship but i just dont know, it makes me question where i fit into her spectrum of things in her life and it comes back to trusting her and what she says that she will do what she can to make this work.

I decided last night that i am turning over a new leaf and just trusting her as she has never given me any reason not too and being with her feels like the best thing thats happened to me in a while and i think thats freaking me out and making me say stupid things to her more than anything.
 
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Captain Planet said:
Weird things all couples fight about
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If you've not heard of Mil Millington, this will amuse you:

Things my girlfriend and I have argued about.

I love it :D

"I came home from work on Friday and, as I wearily opened the door into the house, Second Born, Peter, heard me entering and poked his head out of the living room.
'Hello, Papa - I've missed you,' he shouts. From within the living room Margret's voice calls out to him 'No you haven't, Peter.'

You're all up for testifying for me in court, right?"
 
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No rules at all really.
Some girls invite you round to their house on the first date and act all shocked you are a "bit forward" when you hide the sausage for the third time in the space of five hours.
Others take months before deciding you are not the one.
It's all about going with the flow.
 
agnes said:
I'm regretting it now, I'm a little bit of a mess. But I will see how I feel this weekend.
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You always do, your mind plays tricks on you and you think "Was that really what I wanted?".

Its change that freaks the mind out (did with me anyway) :) Give it a week, move on and everytime you think "aww I want her back" remember why you broke up with her in the first place :)
 
No contact all of yesterday so I tried to initiate some contact via SMS today, asked if she wanted breakfast picking up and if she was coming over, got a SMS back just now saying she is sorry and that she knows she's being distant but just needs a bit of time to herself.

Not really sure how to take that but I'm going to leave her alone for a bit and see what happens.
 
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