The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

mattyprice4004 said:
Well after nearly 6 years, I'm back on my own.
Found one of my 'best mates' with his hands down my GFs pants last night, I'd have sparked him out but I have new carpet.

Onwards and upwards, at least my new house is a pretty sweet man cave... :D
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Damn I wish I had coped as well as you seem to be! Same time as me too!
 
The masterplan is to build the business, work at exporting stock a bit more, and buy a ****ing big house somewhere in Lancashire.
Then at 40 I can retire and drink beer for a living, while floating in a pool.

It's important to have a dream... :p
 
mattyprice4004 said:
The masterplan is to build the business, work at exporting stock a bit more, and buy a ****ing big house somewhere in Lancashire.
Then at 40 I can retire and drink beer for a living, while floating in a pool.

It's important to have a dream... :p
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I kind of feel like you aren't that bothered you're breaking up with her?
 
You'd be surprised how quickly your feelings change for your ex and your relationship once she has crossed that line, I treat mine as a blessing in disguise and owed the fella a pint for showing me what she was really like.

Going through mediation next week to get written agreement in place for the children, as she has turned in to the most evil **** I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. Anyone would think it was me who did the dirty the way I am being treat.
 
Terrier_Jimlad said:
You'd be surprised how quickly your feelings change for your ex and your relationship once she has crossed that line, I treat mine as a blessing in disguise and owed the fella a pint for showing me what she was really like.

Going through mediation next week to get written agreement in place for the children, as she has turned in to the most evil **** I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. Anyone would think it was me who did the dirty the way I am being treat.
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Yeah it's female logic, in her eyes it'll be your fault she cheated you see, you pushed her into it by not doing or not doing whatever she decides
 
Terrier_Jimlad said:
You'd be surprised how quickly your feelings change for your ex and your relationship once she has crossed that line, I treat mine as a blessing in disguise and owed the fella a pint for showing me what she was really like.

Going through mediation next week to get written agreement in place for the children, as she has turned in to the most evil **** I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. Anyone would think it was me who did the dirty the way I am being treat.
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I hope it goes well! A good friend of mine has been through mediation with her ex and he got up and walked out :eek:
 
Well, in my eyes anyway, my ex was letting me bang her so I could look after her (our old) dog while she moved house over a weekend. Since she's moved, I've barely heard a peep from her. I called her out on it and she of course denied it, but I don't buy it. So I'm pretty much ignoring her and I'm severing ties. She's got some photos and some phone bits to get off me, but I'm giving her one word answers whenever she asks if I'm okay or how work is.

Sorry but to me to be friends, you engage in conversation. She didn't reply to me for days at a time so screw her. So if we aren't friends and there's no sex, then there's no reason for us to be talking.

Kills me as for 6 years she's been the number 1 person I've gone to when I need to talk or have something to say, but needs must.
 
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ci_newman said:
Not to put too much of a downer on this, but what are you going to do with your little one?
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She's going with her, but they're only local. I'll still see her loads :)
Luckily she's not crazy (just daft) so access won't be an issue.

I'll keep her room free here, too.

Unrelated, going to view a VW Phaeton W12 on Monday. I may be having some kind of crisis... :p
 
Engaged, second house together, new jobs start tomorrow. Seriously getting second thoughts. Starting to think I would be happier on my own. I changed my job to save the relationship, but not sure if it was the right thing to do. What a rubbish year.
 
If you're not sure then stay engaged for a while but don't get married until you have decided. Don't be pressured into it either by others expectations or your own. In all honesty if I wasn't already married then I know nowadays that I wouldn't get married. I can't say I regret it because I have two lovely children who I love. But I don't think my decision was right back when I did it.
 
Well, four or five months ago I was considering going crawling back to my ex (we split in Oct/Nov last year), and just last week she tried to come crawling back to me. Funny that. Her new BF dumped her, she realises she misses me and things weren't so bad after all and invited me to come visit her for a holiday (she lives abroad). I've been seeing someone for the past two months (my GF as of the day my ex was dumped last week...), so told my ex I was absolutely not interested in her. She said she'd persist and I'd come round to the idea, but I told her flat out I'd not get back with her even if I were single and she has 0% chance. She's depressed, miserable, blah blah, by not humouring her I'm abandoning her in her time of need etc etc, but it's not my problem and I'm not there to be her shoulder to cry on/rebound. I have told my new GF I periodically speak with my ex, which she doesn't mind, but I have told her I'm considering severing ties as it's not fair on her and I'd not want her thinking I'm hung up on my ex.

I guess my message is this: five months ago I was in what felt like an abyss, I was desperate to get my ex back, but I persevered and soldiered on. I woke up one day and decided to move on, to stop looking back and to look forward instead. I'm a happier person for it, I spend more time seeking out ways to improve myself, and I've sought to get back out there. I've completely moved on from a toxic ex whom I dated for nearly five years and have forged a new relationship with someone with much more desirable qualities, whom I couldn't have imagined having a chance with 10 months ago. Things turn around quickly, and I'm glad I didn't try and get my ex back. I can't recall who precisely gave me advice on this thread, but the tough love helped pull me through, and I am extremely grateful for it!

Thanks :)
 
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