The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread
- Thread starter mattyprice4004
- Start date
I still think about mine now when I'm not busy (long drives, boring afternoon etc) and it's 6 months
2 months and I was a complete mess
Asking before you go gives you four months of wedding planning that you don't have to endure
Soldato
- Joined
- 5 Feb 2006
- Posts
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theres no time. don't listen to people say you should be over anything. you do you and don't let any one else concern or tell you what to do. I split up with my ex probably about a year and a half ago. she still usually pops in my head once a day but its not all consuming etc. just give it time and all that. how ever much you want or need
Asking before you go gives you four months of wedding planning that you don't have to endure
A wise man indeed. A very wise man. The plot thickens!
Thats just a stage - after a breakup you need to go through the monging out feeling useless stage - then one day you will wake up with a spring in your step and get on with life again.
Update
well the other girl has been somewhat flakey, she's gone from showing real interest to rescheduling our date nights.
she text me last night asking how I was I just said "im busy atm hit me up when your free"
she comes back saying "free now" but she knows full well I have the kids last night so I didn't reply. I'm sick of chasing girls for my time and until she reschedules she's not worth it, plus she has no Job and living at her cousins who wants to kick her out by January because she's using their house like a hotel I can see it ending really badly.
My ex has been showing real interest she was offered a job and called me instantly I mean she could have called anyone, I got all my clothes ready for our meal tomorrow I'm going suited and booted, new aftershave, shoes, shirt & wastecoat it may seem alittle OTT but you don't want to look like a scruffy dog. First impressions are important.
well the other girl has been somewhat flakey, she's gone from showing real interest to rescheduling our date nights.
she text me last night asking how I was I just said "im busy atm hit me up when your free"
she comes back saying "free now" but she knows full well I have the kids last night so I didn't reply. I'm sick of chasing girls for my time and until she reschedules she's not worth it, plus she has no Job and living at her cousins who wants to kick her out by January because she's using their house like a hotel I can see it ending really badly.
My ex has been showing real interest she was offered a job and called me instantly I mean she could have called anyone, I got all my clothes ready for our meal tomorrow I'm going suited and booted, new aftershave, shoes, shirt & wastecoat it may seem alittle OTT but you don't want to look like a scruffy dog. First impressions are important.
Yet again I've managed to meet someone who sets my world on fire, yet I know they're totally wrong for me on so many levels and not even available. God damn it heart, why must you not listen to the brain!
Better to let go now than get too involved with them mate. It will only hurt more!
I had a girl message me very local, seems nice, attractive, active etc, one year older,wants kids.
Now I've thought.. Ok if this (or the next etc) works out I could easily be In 6 years in Peterborough with 2 kids.. And I don't think I'll be happy. Is it cause I don't want kids? Or is it because I don't want to be here and I see kids as pinning me here.
So this basically means that unless I by chance happen to find someone who has same ambition as me.. I should actually stop looking completely. More. Resist anything that comes.
This is going to be tough. How am I going to actually switch that part in my head off?
Can you switch it off?
Now I've thought.. Ok if this (or the next etc) works out I could easily be In 6 years in Peterborough with 2 kids.. And I don't think I'll be happy. Is it cause I don't want kids? Or is it because I don't want to be here and I see kids as pinning me here.
So this basically means that unless I by chance happen to find someone who has same ambition as me.. I should actually stop looking completely. More. Resist anything that comes.
This is going to be tough. How am I going to actually switch that part in my head off?
Can you switch it off?
I do. But I know a fair few unhappy people who in the end wouldn't be together if it wasn't for kids. What makes them unhappy is another matter. I'm not saying I'd have to move to the ends of the earth.. But at least somewhere that has some scenery and countryside and water. Although preferably it would be the end of the earth
What's happened to the online dates thread? It's not in my subscribed list?
Just wanted to update, got a date on Saturday night. She's invited me to hers, that seem odd?
Bit of a background - met via 'happn' the week before last, started speaking on Friday evening that week. Saturday morning it progressed to Whatsapp and I went to NYC on the Monday.
We've spoken about all sorts, get along very well and it feels like I've known her for ages. She's added me on Facebook etc. After suggesting a date I was looking for a venue when after a few days of chatting and a 4-5 hour non stop message flow on Saturday she suggested her place as she's terrified of first dates.
I'm looking forward to it actually.
Just wanted to update, got a date on Saturday night. She's invited me to hers, that seem odd?
Bit of a background - met via 'happn' the week before last, started speaking on Friday evening that week. Saturday morning it progressed to Whatsapp and I went to NYC on the Monday.
We've spoken about all sorts, get along very well and it feels like I've known her for ages. She's added me on Facebook etc. After suggesting a date I was looking for a venue when after a few days of chatting and a 4-5 hour non stop message flow on Saturday she suggested her place as she's terrified of first dates.
I'm looking forward to it actually.
Looks like this girl is keen for a date. Messaging has been effortless (in that all too often I find that most girls give 2 line answers to multiple questions.. Which is where I give up)
I have decided staying where I am is not an option. So should this get to date 2 I will make it known
Physically she looks pretty good, yoga instructor too (some of these yoga positions aren't natural!)
Messages have a bit of cheekiness to them, but at 31 she may well have rigid plans have to see
I am sure that without my improvement from gym I wouldn't have this opportunity. Even with my **** pics
I have decided staying where I am is not an option. So should this get to date 2 I will make it known
Physically she looks pretty good, yoga instructor too (some of these yoga positions aren't natural!)
Messages have a bit of cheekiness to them, but at 31 she may well have rigid plans have to see
I am sure that without my improvement from gym I wouldn't have this opportunity. Even with my **** pics
Soo i was messaging someone i like after a while the coversation become difficult (Short replys ext) So i just thought to myself they must be busy and stopped messaging them. This morning i had a message about what we were talking about after not talking for about a week. Does this mean they are interested still or what? i'm so confused 
Soo i was messaging someone i like after a while the coversation become difficult (Short replys ext) So i just thought to myself they must be busy and stopped messaging them. This morning i had a message about what we were talking about after not talking for about a week. Does this mean they are interested still or what? i'm so confused
I think myself short replies are death of it
Maybe they were talking to someone else, that fell through and they've dropped back to you?
Either way for me that isn't a game I like to play
Of course that's a personal opinion
Soo i was messaging someone i like after a while the coversation become difficult (Short replys ext) So i just thought to myself they must be busy and stopped messaging them. This morning i had a message about what we were talking about after not talking for about a week. Does this mean they are interested still or what? i'm so confused
This is what you call flakey girls, 90% is that they are not interested and you have become plan b and something better has come along.
ignore the message do not reply, leave it for about a week and see if she texts again this will tell you if she still interested.
had the same thing from the lady im seeing, we met up Monday and she told me she's holding back because she has strong feelings for me and didn't want to get hurt. All I did was act calm and cool with everything didn't reply until she wanted to meet. and we meeting twice this week.
Give girls the benefit of the doubt but if they flake again, move on otherwise you'll be to emotionally involved. Also try and make your texts fun and different women like alittle cheekiness and banter.
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