This, and this "next level love" is just the protective instinct that most animals show.
I don't know if I want kids or not
- Thread starter redrabbit29
- Start date
This, and this "next level love" is just the protective instinct that most animals show.
If we're going down that path of instinct and animal urges isn't traveling (exploring) and gathering exotic material possessions EXACTLY the same?
If the parents and singles of this forum have nothing better to do than bicker about this kind of **** I'll have a slice of your lives. Must be bliss
If the parents and singles of this forum have nothing better to do than bicker about this kind of **** I'll have a slice of your lives. Must be bliss
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I really detest those parents whose whole life resolves around little Johnny. I know their hard work and life changing but what I mean is parents who never ever go out, all they do is talk about their brat.
The worst are ones who post non stop pictures of their offspring on social media as if people really care.
Pictures where it's covered in chocolate or dribbling or sleeping. Yea ok you may think it's cute but i definitely do not.
The worst are ones who post non stop pictures of their offspring on social media as if people really care.
Pictures where it's covered in chocolate or dribbling or sleeping. Yea ok you may think it's cute but i definitely do not.
People who expect their kids to look after them when they're too old to do it themselves? aren't they being selfish?
I''m a young looking, handsome and funloving, 53 yr old with a 30 yr old 'friend'. I have a job, disposable income, own my property, have 2 cats and my freedom...i don't feel the need to re-affirm my existence or prove my worth by having children.
I also couldn't give a toss whether 'Western European' Culture disappears..especially if it annoys the idiots who think such a thing still exists anymore. If it ever did.
I''m a young looking, handsome and funloving, 53 yr old with a 30 yr old 'friend'. I have a job, disposable income, own my property, have 2 cats and my freedom...i don't feel the need to re-affirm my existence or prove my worth by having children.
I also couldn't give a toss whether 'Western European' Culture disappears..especially if it annoys the idiots who think such a thing still exists anymore. If it ever did.
Jumping right to the end of the thread to post I found tinder's comment (^^^) amusing because I kind of do think that having a child would be some sort of assurance to my own worth... a sort of end goal. It's just an instinctive thing I suppose. If I have a child, I sort of think I will have 'won', in a weird way! Well, when I have grandchildren perhaps only then I'll be truly satisfied with my own self-worth 
I'll be 30 this year and would probably like to have kids before I'm 40. I don't want to be old before they grow up. Edit - as in so I can be energetic and help them out... and not be to old to enjoy my freedom when I get it back.
Also - completely agree that people making social media posts about their children is weird.
Finally, I do think there are few things nicer than really nice, well behaved kids. Just all playing along together with toy cars etc... it's just really, really enjoyable... especially when you join in!
I'll be 30 this year and would probably like to have kids before I'm 40. I don't want to be old before they grow up. Edit - as in so I can be energetic and help them out... and not be to old to enjoy my freedom when I get it back.
Also - completely agree that people making social media posts about their children is weird.
Finally, I do think there are few things nicer than really nice, well behaved kids. Just all playing along together with toy cars etc... it's just really, really enjoyable... especially when you join in!
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Yeah, the reason of kids looking after you when you're old. It's flawed, selfish, and far from likely.
This thread really has people polarised.
I've said it before.. I wonder how many people regret having kids. Including those who won't admit it to themselves or others.
This thread really has people polarised.
I've said it before.. I wonder how many people regret having kids. Including those who won't admit it to themselves or others.
No just in general that is what some people say
Only iota of drive I have to have kids is that fairy tale cute kid about 8 and teaching it something you love and getting a hug. This is a short stage, before comes the sleepless nights and nappies, after y the moody expensive teenager. The logic part of me knows this isn't real 99pc of the time and I snap out of it.
I think somewhere in me my empathy got muddled up, what others feel for people I feel for animals. I loved my dog my ex has. And still makes me sad I don't see her. Loved playing in the lake with her, teaching her tricks. Can't imagine feeling that for a child. Think it's that unconditional love you get from a dog vs endless hassle from kids
Me and gf both can't wait to be in a position to have a dog.
That's a very different meaning to life to what I think. Mine is just to be happy and he'll those in clear to.
Do you think that the only meaningful thing about you is that you're a vessel for about half of each of your parents' DNA?
Do you think that your parents are (or were) only partly meaningful because only some of their DNA was copied into their child(ren)?
Do you think that almost everyone in the world is part of the meaning of your life because their DNA has some of the same sequences as your DNA? Probably quite a lot in some cases, since there's surprisingly little genetic diversity in humans.
I think you've made up a meaning for life that doesn't stand up to much scrutiny.
I've had guys tell me they regret having kids. But to be fair to them, they also speak of a love for their kids unlike anything they've ever felt before. I respect that. But I have an idea that the ones that said that, was pressured into having them by a female with her nose one micron away from The Wall. I wonder how many really made that choice on their own volition.
Look it's going to be different for everyone. Then people as they are, will always try and convince you of the righteousness of their situation. We have a big multi page thread, some 'men' get emotional trying to convince
Don't worry for every couple that have decided that reproducing themselves isn't the be all and end all of their existence, there's 999 others that have been socially engineered to churn out fresh little dole scroungers and future cannon fodder.
LOL! You have such a way with words.
lol - that's obviously not what he was implying.
From a biological perspective we are 'engineered' (without design) to pass on our genes and live long enough to do so. The same goes for any other living organism. That is what he was alluding to. It is obviously irrelevant how much of the population shares your genes - well, unless you're a eusocial animal like a naked mole rat or a bee
There isn't any 'true purpose' unless you start going towards religious ideas.
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unless you're a eusocial animal like a naked mole rat or a bee
Beads?
My fiance is very keen on children. She's dropping hints. Keeps saying "our children" etc. I think she is trying to get me mentally prepared.
Whilst I've thought a few times that I could be a good Dad and do the right thing and learn by my parents mistakes...truth be told, I'm scared ******** about being a parent. A lot of it stems from my own family being so god damn messed up, I wouldn't want to even think about subjecting my own flesh and blood to that potential future.
But then again, I think I just need to man up a bit
My fiance already knows it will be very difficult for her to have children though. So if this isn't possible, I know this will put a lot of strain on us both. But we're rocks for each other...we'll get through it.
Whilst I've thought a few times that I could be a good Dad and do the right thing and learn by my parents mistakes...truth be told, I'm scared ******** about being a parent. A lot of it stems from my own family being so god damn messed up, I wouldn't want to even think about subjecting my own flesh and blood to that potential future.
But then again, I think I just need to man up a bit
My fiance already knows it will be very difficult for her to have children though. So if this isn't possible, I know this will put a lot of strain on us both. But we're rocks for each other...we'll get through it.
Never a truer word spoken. Other people's kids generally annoy me, unless they are the kids of friends who were born around the same time as mine. In which case you kind of share a weird bond with them and their parents.
You are probably in one of the situations that is the most mind-bendingly confusing and anxiety inducing in a man's life. Aged in your 30's with a partner approaching the less fertile years of her life. The pressure is immense on women at this point in their life if they want kids, and that gets passed onto the would-be dad.
You will make the right decision regardless of what the internet says. No matter what decision you make, you will never know what would have happened if you made the other choice, so in that sense, any decision is right.