Selfishness

Guest2 said:
So I got called selfish tonight by my girlfriend.
We went to M&S where I spent £16 on dinner. She asked if she could take leftovers for lunch to which I said no as planned to have tomorrow for both our dinners instead of spending more money. I then got called selfish
She pays towards food and I pay for other things - mortgage, bills, holidays and most lunch and restaurant meals.
I'm rather fuming so just needed a rant really

Does that sound selfish to you?
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You don't need to ask strangers if you are being selfish towards your girlfriend, your own opinion is the only thing that matters here. If you believe you are being reasonable then that's what matters. From my perspective it looks like you're paying way more than her, which is absolutely fine as long as she understands she's getting a good deal, as soon as she doesn't understand that then kindly inform her that you're happy to go 50/50 on all bills if she feels you're being selfish.
 
Guest2 said:
So I got called selfish tonight by my girlfriend.
We went to M&S where I spent £16 on dinner. She asked if she could take leftovers for lunch to which I said no as planned to have tomorrow for both our dinners instead of spending more money. I then got called selfish
She pays towards food and I pay for other things - mortgage, bills, holidays and most lunch and restaurant meals.
I'm rather fuming so just needed a rant really

Does that sound selfish to you?
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Maybe. I missed something, but at a quick glance it sounded more cheap than selfish, perhaps a bit of both.
Although if you pay to take her out for lunch/dinner, it would suggest that you’re not cheap, so I guess that I may have missed something in the translation.
Every Monday my wife’s great-nephew and his girlfriend drop in for dinner, and my wife inevitably ends up putting any left overs in Tupperware boxes for the pair of them to to take to work next day, and why not, better than wasting it.
 
Jean-F said:
Maybe. I missed something, but at a quick glance it sounded more cheap than selfish, perhaps a bit of both.
Although if you pay to take her out for lunch/dinner, it would suggest that you’re not cheap, so I guess that I may have missed something in the translation.
Every Monday my wife’s great-nephew and his girlfriend drop in for dinner, and my wife inevitably ends up putting any left overs in Tupperware boxes for the pair of them to to take to work next day, and why not, better than wasting it.
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He said he pays for the mortgage and bills as well
 
Roar87 said:
He said he pays for the mortgage and bills as well
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Then perhaps he’s not a bad guy, it just made him sound cheap to jib at her wanting to use the dinner leftovers for next day’s lunch, it’d be like me saying, “No, you can’t have them, they go in the fridge until I’m hungry.”
 
Seems a bit tight tbh... also the fact you even mentioned it was £16... just let her have the leftovers and buy something else for dinner - probably a better outcome as a) you have a bit more variety in terms of food rather than the same meal as the night before just reheated b) for the sake of a few quid you've saved having an argument over something trivial.
 
Not selfish but definitely tight/cheap. When I cook something for my girlfriend I will do my best to persuade her to take any leftovers to have for her lunch, so she doesn't need to buy anything. I guess it's called being a good boyfriend, putting the other person first, at least I hope so.
 
My wife makes me lunch. Leftovers get saved for a couple of days and used with jacket potatoes, though those meals can be a bit random.
 
Guest2 said:

I spent £16 on dinner.
I pay for other things - mortgage, bills, holidays and *most* lunch and restaurant meals.
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as other forum members have said, you come across as being cheap. You need to pay for EVERYTHING!

#metoo
#cornersofa
#equalrightsarenotreallyequalrightsbutwesayandpretendthattheyare

have a chat with Tony Williams
 
TheOracle said:
as other forum members have said, you come across as being cheap. You need to pay for EVERYTHING!

#metoo
#cornersofa
#equalrightsarenotreallyequalrightsbutwesayandpretendthattheyare

have a chat with Tony Williams
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Need to give her the full Tony William's experience and treat her to KFC.
 
VincentHanna said:
He didn't mention what he earned vs what she earned though.
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I have no problem with him paying for the mortgage and bills if he earns more and is happy do that, but she does need to appreciate the fact that she's in a privileged position for him to be doing that; what has happened here is that she now feels entitled to him paying for the bills and is taking it for granted and has acted like a spoiled brat.
 
if you were that tight for money I don't see why you would pay for a meal and then leave some of it. M&S too, such extravagance. That £16 in Lidl or Tesco could feed your 3x as much.
 
me and my ex (so im not one to advise} would put all the income in a joint currant account didnt matter how unequal the contributions were ,but also we were both thrifty £16 quid wouldn't be spent on food thats worth a couple of quid
 
Convo in my house probably would have gone...

"Can I take the leftovers for lunch tomorrow?"
"I was going to use it for tomorrow night's dinner, but you can take it if you like. What would you like for dinner tomorrow? Do you want to grab something on the way home?"
"Sure, thanks. I'll pick something up on the way home"

Done.
 
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