OcUK Dadsnet thread

[robj20]

Was out at weekend enjoying the weather.
Why am i the bad person for having ago at someone for touching George. Total stranger, we were stood eating a snack on a pier when an old woman took hold of Georges hand and started talking like they do.
First time ive had anyone touch him though and i said "don't touch him" in i suppose an angry voice. Her husband im guessing took offence at this.
I just started is walking again.

Now later in the day we were having some dinner.
Old couple again on the table next to us were giving George some attention, then started talking to us, asked how old, his name so on and so on.
They got up to leave and the guy asked the wife if it was okay to shake Georges hand and said nice to meet you.

Second situation im totally fine with, the first hell no.

 

[SpeedFreak]

Was out at weekend enjoying the weather.
Why am i the bad person for having ago at someone for touching George. Total stranger, we were stood eating a snack on a pier when an old woman took hold of Georges hand and started talking like they do.
First time ive had anyone touch him though and i said "don't touch him" in i suppose an angry voice. Her husband im guessing took offence at this.
I just started is walking again.

Now later in the day we were having some dinner.
Old couple again on the table next to us were giving George some attention, then started talking to us, asked how old, his name so on and so on.
They got up to leave and the guy asked the wife if it was okay to shake Georges hand and said nice to meet you.

Second situation im totally fine with, the first hell no.

It's really your choice as to how you react. People (mostly females) are drawn to cute young kids and it will happen from time. My view is that there is an instinctive element to it so I wouldn't personally berate somebody for it.

 

[gonda]

Wife and I have our 12 week scan in a couple of weeks for our 1st, finding this thread has been a bit of a godsend as though I've always wanted kids and am genuinely over the moon, every now and again I get a wave of anxiety already about doing things right and knowing everything I need to know. I guess it's good to be reminded that it's everyone's first time once!

 

[robj20]

You pick it up as you go along. Not really much to go wrong really, they wont let you leave the hospital without knowing the things you NEED to know, everything else just enjoy learning them and making funny mistakes. Like leaving the little ones you know what pointing outside the nappy.

 

[gonda]

You pick it up as you go along. Not really much to go wrong really, they wont let you leave the hospital without knowing the things you NEED to know, everything else just enjoy learning them and making funny mistakes. Like leaving the little ones you know what pointing outside the nappy.

Imagine that's not a mistake you make too many times

 

[Devrij]

Wife and I have our 12 week scan in a couple of weeks for our 1st, finding this thread has been a bit of a godsend as though I've always wanted kids and am genuinely over the moon, every now and again I get a wave of anxiety already about doing things right and knowing everything I need to know. I guess it's good to be reminded that it's everyone's first time once!

I'll give you one piece of advice, and only one, because you'll be given it by every Tom, dick and Harry who you didn't ask for it.

Protip: if, in your panic, as you manhandle an excrement covered baby around a changing mat like some David and goliath mud wrestling match, you forget to open the nappy bag before getting your hands dirty... Moisten your fingers with a wet wipe so you don't have to lick them to gain purchase on the bag.

 

[dl8860]

Imagine that's not a mistake you make too many times

You'd think so, but there's so many things to juggle and you do it so often that it's a fact of life that this happens pretty often!

 

[RoboCod]

You pick it up as you go along. Not really much to go wrong really, they wont let you leave the hospital without knowing the things you NEED to know, everything else just enjoy learning them and making funny mistakes. Like leaving the little ones you know what pointing outside the nappy.

It's funny though, we had a home birth. None of this "you aren't going home until you can prove you can feed him, etc". People believe that they don't have choices when it comes to hospitals and child birth in particular. I learned a lot from the hypno birthing course. How hospitals tell the woman what they're going to do to them next and women believe they have to comply. Armed with what we know now, we know we can refuse whatever we wanted and insisted on a certain method or routine. Her body, her choice.

 

[gonda]

Protip: if, in your panic, as you manhandle an excrement covered baby around a changing mat like some David and goliath mud wrestling match, you forget to open the nappy bag before getting your hands dirty... Moisten your fingers with a wet wipe so you don't have to lick them to gain purchase on the bag.

That sounds like good advice...

 

[Steedie]

We got the results back today from the blood tests

1 in 160 chance of Downs syndrome
1 in 10248 chance of Edward's or Patau

So while 1 in 160 isn't as low risk as it could be, it's a hell of a lot better than we were led to believe it would be from the way the nurse told us about the initial NT measurement. I feel so much better but obviously we're not out the woods yet as there is the risk of cardiac abnormalities and the other risks of high NT, but still, I'm pleased with this first step We're going to Disneyland Paris tomorrow and I would have hated for some bad news to ruin that trip for my son because we would be so upset about the news.

 

[Over Clocker]

Was out at weekend enjoying the weather.
Why am i the bad person for having ago at someone for touching George. Total stranger, we were stood eating a snack on a pier when an old woman took hold of Georges hand and started talking like they do.
First time ive had anyone touch him though and i said "don't touch him" in i suppose an angry voice. Her husband im guessing took offence at this.
I just started is walking again.

Now later in the day we were having some dinner.
Old couple again on the table next to us were giving George some attention, then started talking to us, asked how old, his name so on and so on.
They got up to leave and the guy asked the wife if it was okay to shake Georges hand and said nice to meet you.

Second situation im totally fine with, the first hell no.

Wow, your choice but I'd say that was rather over the top and rude of you!

 

[Steedie]

Was out at weekend enjoying the weather.
Why am i the bad person for having ago at someone for touching George. Total stranger, we were stood eating a snack on a pier when an old woman took hold of Georges hand and started talking like they do.
First time ive had anyone touch him though and i said "don't touch him" in i suppose an angry voice. Her husband im guessing took offence at this.
I just started is walking again.

Now later in the day we were having some dinner.
Old couple again on the table next to us were giving George some attention, then started talking to us, asked how old, his name so on and so on.
They got up to leave and the guy asked the wife if it was okay to shake Georges hand and said nice to meet you.

Second situation im totally fine with, the first hell no.

Generational thing. They grew up in a time when innocent interaction with a child wouldn't brand you a peado and have some kind of malicious intent. You're not in the minority of reacting that way these days

 

[robj20]

It's got nothing to do with me thinking they're peados.
I just don't like strangers interacting with my child.
You wouldn't walk up to an adult and hold there hand would you do why is it okay to do the same to a child.

 

[eddie101]

Went for the 12 week scan with my wife for our first. Was really apprehensive this morning but now it's all done I think it's now sunk in we're actually having a baby. Was amazing watching the little bugger do flips and rolls. Can't wait to met him/her now

 

[scotty365]

The new CSA system that has been introduced by the government ... er... criminals? Has had me paying 23.4% more than I should have since January because its not 25% - if it was then I would be eligible to have it adjusted to a sensible level. However, it's far more incredible than that as most people under the new rules can attest, now I have to work more each year to manage the extra burden, then, the same the year after to cover the extra money I have to pay from having to work more the previous year because the previous year before that increased the 'figure' they have forced on me. You see I have to 'share' my bonuses and overtime etc... and unfortunately I had 3 months off work unpaid.... and guess what... yes I still have to pay EVERY penny despite not having any income for 3 months.... The system is broken and the people on the other end of the phone know this - they phoned the police because they were afraid for my welfare as I had MINUS £113 to live on each week for 12 weeks.... yep they called at the door to see if I was okay..... I wasn't okay and wasn't suicidal - I still pay what I cannot afford despite the concern. When they contacted my ex about this financial issue - she laughed out loud in front of my parents, who were there to see my daughter, thinking it hilarious that I had suffered a mental breakdown.

This government and its members are a disgrace to working people over the UK - they are simply re-appropriating money from those that earn to those that don't - I have always paid for my child yet I'm to pay more than I can afford - yep I know I am such a selfish man, always concerned with myself and what matters to me....

 

[robfosters]

It's got nothing to do with me thinking they're peados.
I just don't like strangers interacting with my child.
You wouldn't walk up to an adult and hold there hand would you do why is it okay to do the same to a child.

No need to reprimand her angrily though. She didn’t realise she was doing wrong.

 

[RoboCod]

It's got nothing to do with me thinking they're peados.
I just don't like strangers interacting with my child.
You wouldn't walk up to an adult and hold there hand would you do why is it okay to do the same to a child.

Then I think you're overreacting and being too protective. Which is fine and understandable, but interaction with strangers is key to your child's development. What did you expect to happen, since you were stood right there watching? It's your child, but you don't own them, they're not property. Let the child go and discover, step in and intervene when required.

 

[robj20]

Then I think you're overreacting and being too protective. Which is fine and understandable, but interaction with strangers is key to your child's development. What did you expect to happen, since you were stood right there watching? It's your child, but you don't own them, they're not property. Let the child go and discover, step in and intervene when required.

Its nothing to do with being too protective. Its just common courtesy ask the parent before you start playing with my child. If they had grabbed his other hand/arm they could have hurt him.

I will say again how would you act if a total stranger walked up to you and just held your hand. I'm guessing you'd do more than words. So why is it okay to do the same to a baby. I have no issues with people interacting with him, but engage with either me or the mum first.
Would you also allow them to give your baby something to eat? The wrong food for ours could make him very sick, where do you draw the line.

Not property no, but fully under my care until hes old enough to make decisions for himself, what a silly comment. Should i let him bum shuffle to the shops on his own as well.

 

[Kreeeee]

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[robj20]

I get old ladies playing with my kids (pinching cheeks/ruffling hair) when in the queue at the shops. It's really not a big deal and social interaction is very important for kids.

Just different then. Going to continue to pull strangers up for touching him. By all means talk to him.
He gets plenty of social interaction with people that are polite enough to ask. So the odd impolite person can do one.

No one is answering my question regards if someone did the same to you would that be just fine.
If i came up to you and pinched your cheeks and ruffled your hair, you wouldn't mind, its not a big deal after all.

This all doesn't even take into account he's susceptible to chest related infections.
I just generally find it weird for strangers to want to touch somebody they don't know. But some how is okay because that somebody can't say no for themselves.