am I right or wrong?

Ok, so firstly, regardless that he is your father in law... In his shoes I wouldn't be best pleased if you owed me £380 and hadnt paid it back. Especially if you have the cash to buy gt5.

I can't believe that he would truely have the malice to intentionally start the car to cause more damage.

My take? There are clearly underlying issues with you and this guy. You were crazy to take the car there if you thought he was capable of being a douche, but equally it sounds like you need to sort your priorities out and pay him what you already owe before considering any other expenditure other than the absolute essentials.

I doubt the RAC will get involved once they know your related.
 
I'm fully aware that I can only give you my side of this story however I was worried that I'd come to the wrong conclusion myself and was seeking other peoples opinions hence starting this thread. I have 100% truthful expect that I should mention that he is really my wifes step farther. (might go some way to explain a few details..)

But this is a subject that's not talked about in their family as there have been a few incidents where grandparents (my father in laws parents) have wanted pictures of only the real grand children at a family wedding a few years back.

make up your own mind....

Anywho, I'm not a confrontation person (more of a lover than a fighter) so it took a lot for me to even tell him that I thought it was his fault. As for taking him to court, that's not something I'm going to be doing. Even though my wife is on my side and I don't care about MY relationship with him, but I don't want my kids or my wife to suffer.

I currently owe his garage £380 for work completed a few months back (it's this reason that I go back to him, he allows payment at a later time with no interest) so I'm thinking of giving him the car and drawing a line under the whole thing. My only problem is that I don't know how much damage has been caused so don't know what it'll take to fix it.

It could be that the timing has slipped only slightly so thee's no real damage done, just need re-aligning. if that's the case I'm giving him a profit as he'll be able to turn it round quickly and sell it.

If this was me, i'd take the Moral High Ground and ask him to fix it.

Then start paying everything back.

If its got this far down the line without being resolved, it wont get resolved overnight, and you need your car back.

Its only money at the end of the day, there's plenty more where that came from. Yes its a lot that you can't afford right now, but its not like you'll never have any ever again, just give him it and you can take the moral high ground and look the better person.
 
Sod the moral high ground he owes the bloke money already.

Either go in there and offer him 50 quid a week to fix this and add on what you already owe him, or if you cant face doing that take it somewhere else.

I cant see what difference it makes who is at fault, he dont like you so he aint going to fix it free now anyway.
 
Laguna, post #7.

You're not going to get anywhere without evidence, and tbh even if the RAC man makes a statement, from what you've said I doubt he will be able to categorically say one way or the other, since it appears the RAC never saw the car with its engine running prior to the mechanic starting it. You're stuffed basically by the sounds of it.

I agree that asking the RAC is a nonstarter in terms of convincing him it wasn’t me that did the damage. It’s purely for my peace of mind.

So you think I did the damage?

Doesn’t it sound reasonable that even if the cam had slipped during the tow to the garage, that he shouldn’t of tried starting it just in case it had indeed slipped?


Ok, so firstly, regardless that he is your father in law... In his shoes I wouldn't be best pleased if you owed me £380 and hadn’t paid it back. Especially if you have the cash to buy gt5.

An agreement was made that I would repay the full amount at the end of the year as I have loads of overtime from work due in Decembers pay.

GT5 was accorded via my work (along with a few other items) that is paid for monthly starting in January.

I can't believe that he would truly have the malice to intentionally start the car to cause more damage.

My take? There are clearly underlying issues with you and this guy. You were crazy to take the car there if you thought he was capable of being a douche, but equally it sounds like you need to sort your priorities out and pay him what you already owe before considering any other expenditure other than the absolute essentials.

I doubt the RAC will get involved once they know your related.

I’m not for one moment suggesting that he did it on purpose. Although we have issues, I wouldn’t believe that he’d do such a thing, regardless of what he thinks of me.



If this was me, I’d take the Moral High Ground and ask him to fix it.

Then start paying everything back.

If it’s got this far down the line without being resolved, it won’t get resolved overnight, and you need your car back.

Its only money at the end of the day, there's plenty more where that came from. Yes it’s a lot that you can't afford right now, but it’s not like you'll never have any ever again, just give him it and you can take the moral high ground and look the better person.


Although my better side likes this approach, If I was going to have the car fixed, it’ll be by someone less and NOT at his garage. (ever again.)


Sod the moral high ground he owes the bloke money already.

Either go in there and offer him 50 quid a week to fix this and add on what you already owe him, or if you can’t face doing that take it somewhere else.

I can’t see what difference it makes who is at fault, he don’t like you so he aint going to fix it free now anyway.


I was never asking for him to do the job for free. I was simply asking him to repair the damage that he had caused. I was quite happy to pay for parts and labour on the aux belt that needed replacing but I feel cheated that I’d have to pay for his mistake. Plus the fact that when I spoke to him it was all ‘when you started it’, ‘you shouldn’t have’ and so on.

The only thing that I can relate this to is that if he had called me and asked me to fix his computer (something I've done many, many times and built them a couple of website all with free hosting all for nothing) which sparked when pressing the power button and he told me 'i've been told that spark might blow the mobo' I wouldn't then go 'oh, ok.' and press the button to see for myself. I'd fix/replace the button and go from there.
 
Although my better side likes this approach, If I was going to have the car fixed, it’ll be by someone less and NOT at his garage. (ever again.)

Sounds like a plan

Get ringing round the yellow pages for towing companies and find a good price and get it towed somewhere else.

THen never speak to him again and pay the money owed through a third party.
 
It doesn't matter who's right or wrong, the car is broke and requires fixing or replacing. Personally I'd thank him for his help and offer he keeps the car in lieu of the £380 plus any costs he has already incurred and go out and buy another car

That's my thinking.

I've got some bonds that we where given when we got married last year. we were hoping to keep them to put towards a deposit but having a car is way more important at the moment.
 
Well dont go, that ones easy solved.

Yeah... you try tell my wife that....

plus my 3year old loves it over at grandma's and i imo, Christmas is for the kids anyway so I really don't want to ruin that.

I suppose I could stay at home while she takes them over for a few hours, get a bit of gaming on chrimbo morning in :)
 
Yeah... you try tell my wife that....

plus my 3year old loves it over at grandma's and i imo, Christmas is for the kids anyway so I really don't want to ruin that.

I suppose I could stay at home while she takes them over for a few hours, get a bit of gaming on chrimbo morning in :)

Thats it mate send her over there.
 
I'm in Calmore, Just off Blackwater Drive. Only 5mins walk away.

Drive a lowered Silver polo Gti with a personal plate, you'll probably see me out and about.

Wheres your sig photo taken? I've got a similar one, theres a nice motorway bridge with a low railing leading to a farm just past the The Empress Of Blandings in Copythorn.

Small World.
 
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I'm in Calmore, Just off Blackwater Drive. Only 5mins walk away.

Drive a lowered Silver polo Gti with a personal plate, you'll probably see me out and about.

Wheres your sig photo taken? I've got a similar one, theres a nice motorway bridge with a low railing leading to a farm just past the The Empress Of Blandings in Copythorn.

Small World.


think i have seen that about....


it's taken on the bridge next leading to Pautons park, looking towards the A31.

I'm thinking a ocuk totton meet :)
 
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