Awkward Topic of Conversation - How to Approach

Record it and set every possible thing to it. Everyone's ringtone. The front door bell. Install sensors on door frames and speakers in every room, linked to a PC, so that random parts of their noise are played very loudly in a room whenever any door to it is open. And the cupboards in the kitchen. And the toilet seat lids.

Then you all pretend you can't hear any of it.

EDIT: I like the betting option, but in the form of a literal book in some shared living space in the house. Maybe a diary, so people can easily offer bets on specific days. e.g. 23rd of October 2010 section "Six6siX offers a £20 bet that they'll spend at least 60 minutes having sex today" Anyone in the house can therefore easily offer their own bets and/or accept bets offered by others.

Remember to agree rules and stick a printout of them next to the book in order to avoid arguments.
 
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Wait until they've finished, give them a few minutes to start falling asleep or whatever, then blast some REALLY LOUD porn towards their room.

Or: Buy an air horn. After a few minutes, let it off outside their door until they quieten down.

Third option: When they're at it, knock on the door until they stop, and simply say "Guys, can you keep it down please?"
 
Casually approach them one day and say:

"Hi. Listen, you don't mind if I masturbate to the noise of you two having sex, do you? You make a public performance of it, so I think you can't mind. Some of the people in the house thought you might though, when we were discussing it. So I thought I'd ask."

Offer them £25 and say it's their share of the payment from the porn company you sold their sexy moaning to.

Lots of GD style suggestions.
 
Buy a wireless door bell where you can record your own bell (about £30 from homebase), put the speaker in their room hidden. Record an appropriate message as the door bell. Every time time the start up press the doorbell constantly.

Alternatively the rape alarm grenade. Purchase a rape alarm. When they start up, pull the pin, launch it into the room, run away with the pin.
 
Instead of coming up with an intricate plan, you could just say "Can you keep it down?". They're obviously not shy, so why fart about?
 
I am stumped as to why this has not been posted yet:

loud_sex.png
 
not sure what all this wait for the appropriate time business is about, the time to exact most disruption in an almost adult way is to bang on the door while they're at it and ask them to keep it down.
 
The alternative is to listen for anything embarrassing said and repeat it ad infinitum, my ex's flatmate did this, my ex soon learnt to be quiet when said flatmate was in at least.
 
If it's too awkward to approach face-to-face, just write them a polite note and post it through their door. You never know, it might make them think?
 
My girlfriend has very loud aggressive sex - it's rather off putting when I'm trying to sleep in the spare bedroom.
 
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