Chat up lines. Get in there my son!

[mr.bond]

Don't let this rape turn into a murder.

 

[petemyster]

"assume the position"

 

[Buffman]

"You're gonna get laid tonight"
"Why"
"Because I'm stronger than you"

*Gets coat*

 

[4p]

"You're gonna get laid tonight"
"Why"
"Because I'm stronger than you"

*Gets coat*

ROFL

 

[Deleted member 651465]

"I want to be on you"

 

[platinum87]

Ended up with me sat on my ass on the floor of the bar with a bloody nose and the bar staff wetting themselves.
Big girls can have a mean straight right.

ha ha

 

[Skidder]

you "I bet you 50p I can make your **** move without touching them"

girl "OK"

you /jiggle her boobs

you /give her 50p

Works like a charm.

BTW, I haven't used this since I was a student which is a long time ago, you may want to up it to £1 so as not to look cheap.

EDIT: how unoriginal am I? just saw above........sorry

 

[Buffman]

A way to tell if she's a keeper:
"Right hen, fancy getting your knees dirty?"
*replace hen with local dialect for female..Or maybe male .

 

[Doohickey]

"You're gonna get laid tonight"
"Why"
"Because I'm stronger than you"

*Gets coat*

Hahaha

 

[uknowist]

My mate used "You'll Do!" for a laugh.. almost worked once, but no

 

[Mr-White]

do a search there's an epic thread from a few years back about chat up lines

some of my fav were:-

"get in my car i've got a knife"

"lets not turn this rape into murder"

MW

 

[mike5678]

My mate used "You'll Do!" for a laugh.. almost worked once, but no

Back to my uni days, I witnessed my mate use this:

"Can I have your number, I'll call you later if I don't find anything better"

It was good enough for that girl! She did weigh more than him though.

 

[MookJong]

"get in my car i've got a knife"

NOOOOO, it's "Get your coat, ive got a knife"

 

[CaptainComedy]

"lets not turn this rape into murder"

oh god

 

[MookJong]

What's a nice girl like you doing with a face like that?

Come on, you can't get pregnant again.

 

[romperstomper]

Come on I will be doing you a favour

 

[roid]

"Bet you a quid I can make yer **** wobble without touching them"

*hands on wibble*

"Best quid I ever spent"

Ended up with me sat on my ass on the floor of the bar with a bloody nose and the bar staff wetting themselves.
Big girls can have a mean straight right.

I can just imagine how that went down lol

"You're gonna get laid tonight"
"Why"
"Because I'm stronger than you"

*Gets coat*

Best rape joke i've heard, if thats possible

"I want to be on you"

Can't go wrong with anchorman

 

[Tefal]

Tefal:
Sex, lol \o/

W00p \o/

 

[kefkef]

"Get your coat, i want to see if you're as good in the sack as your mother!"

 

[Perywinkle]

I can just imagine how that went down lol

I was young and ****, it seemed a good idea at the time.


Don't swear! FF.