Corrupt a wish

kalvindeane · 9 Jun 2010 at 18:10

LOAM said:
I wish today to be exciting

It is exciting, but not for you. Infact you find everything extremely boring and jump off a tall building. This creates excitement for everyone else.

I wish the shower in my house was working.

PhillyDee · 9 Jun 2010 at 18:12

kalvindeane said:
It is exciting, but not for you. Infact you find everything extremely boring and jump off a tall building. This creates excitement for everyone else.

I wish the shower in my house was working.

Your shower works, however, it only sprays concentrated nitric acid, and the first thing you wash isnt your torso or limbs . . . .

I wish I had a laser cutter!

Skillmister · 9 Jun 2010 at 18:43

You have one, except it only cuts through vegetables.

I wish i had a job.

kalvindeane · 9 Jun 2010 at 20:28

Skillmister said:
I wish i had a job.

Granted. However, your job isn't what you'd hoped for. You must clean the multiple chins of Johnny Vegas on an hourly basis.
I wish I no longer had athlete's foot.

Andr3w · 9 Jun 2010 at 20:34

Granted, they have to take your foot off as it gets too bad!

I wish I had my own house

paddy · 9 Jun 2010 at 21:00

Your new house is a crack den, upon inspection you stand on a used needle.

I wish Big Brother was over

xJcBx · 9 Jun 2010 at 21:11

paddy said:
Your new house is a crack den, upon inspection you stand on a used needle.

I wish Big Brother was over

Big Brother is over, but you have to live with the house mates.

I wish I could afford a Macbook Pro.

yoyo50 · 9 Jun 2010 at 21:14

xJcBx said:
Big Brother is over, but you have to live with the house mates.

I wish I could afford a Macbook Pro.

You can afford a Macbook Pro but it only runs win 7

I wish i had a veyron

Naffa · 9 Jun 2010 at 22:17

You've been granted a Veyron, but it's electronically limited to 30mph and runs on diesel.

I wish that my willy was really small.

paddy · 9 Jun 2010 at 22:29

It is really small, and covered in small black hair.

I wish I had some food in my fridge

Beren · 9 Jun 2010 at 23:28

You have food in the fridge but it is all rotten.

I wish I had a return flight to New Zealand

Naffa · 9 Jun 2010 at 23:36

Beren said:
You have food in the fridge but it is all rotten.

I wish I had a return flight to New Zealand

You do, but you're not on it.

I wish that I body was made from 100% water.

SPARC · 10 Jun 2010 at 00:50

naffa said:
You do, but you're not on it.

I wish that I body was made from 100% water.

Done! but for reasons known to themselves you end up in a big fat hairy guys bath being rubbed all over his sweaty body. eewww

I wish I could be as good a driver as Lewis Hamilton.

Sgt_Pepper · 10 Jun 2010 at 00:59

SPARC said:
Done! but for reasons known to themselves you end up in a big fat hairy guys bath being rubbed all over his sweaty body. eewww

I wish I could be as good a driver as Lewis Hamilton.

You are as good as Lewis Hammilton.....

at this moment in tme >>>

I wish i never ever got tired.

kalvindeane · 10 Jun 2010 at 13:42

Sgt_Pepper said:
I wish i never ever got tired.

You never get tired...you stay awake for the rest of your life, but still feel the effects of not sleeping.
I wish my Betamethasone Valerate Cream didn't take so long to soak in.

LOAM · 10 Jun 2010 at 13:54

kalvindeane said:
You never get tired...you stay awake for the rest of your life, but still feel the effects of not sleeping.
I wish my Betamethasone Valerate Cream didn't take so long to soak in.

it soaks in instantly, however you've applied it to your anus.

I wish I didn't have to re mortgage the house to buy a new car.

Guest2 · 10 Jun 2010 at 14:15

LOAM said:
I wish I didn't have to re mortgage the house to buy a new car.

You don't, instead you win one of the new cars off the original Bulls-Eye!

I wish I hadnt been made redundant last week along with 1/4 of our company

Benihana · 10 Jun 2010 at 14:44

Guest2 said:
You don't, instead you win one of the new cars off the original Bulls-Eye!

I wish I hadnt been made redundant last week along with 1/4 of our company

You're kept on, but like the other 3/4 of the company you get sent to work down a coal mine in China with all the dust you can eat as salary.

I wish my car didn't smell like a stagnant puddle

998cc · 10 Jun 2010 at 14:51

Benihana said:
I wish my car didn't smell like a stagnant puddle

Granted, it now stinks of horse ****

I wish i could find the elusive g-spot.

Metalface Mark · 10 Jun 2010 at 14:56

You find it but only after you have murdered and disected her.

I wish i could eat what i wanted but never get fat.