Going on a date tonight for a the first time in a while - Very Nervous..!!

iv-tecman said:
Cheers everyone – so don’t go with a ‘loaded gun’ have a few drinks, punch her and drag her home and call out ‘alpha male’ is the way to go then?

Oh – and if she’s ugly run away? LOL

Right all joking aside – no I’ll chill, nerves are bad, stomach is turning but I’ve seen her picture, although you never know – she’s not ugly. Very attractive. And be myself, just as I was in the emails and txt messages we’ve exchanged..

Phew – still nervous though..


pix plz? :D
 
Robbie G said:
Then why does she need to use internet dating! I thought it was reserved for ugly people :p

:D now that was low.. :p

Have respect..!! :D

she might not be ugly - dunno about me... I'm not posting pictures on this thread, the photoshop gang are already waiting with the application loaded, ready for the first edits.. :D

If nothing else, this thread has made me laugh.. Thanks everyone... Not so sure about some of the advice though..
 
iv-tecman said:
Cheers everyone – so don’t go with a ‘loaded gun’ have a few drinks, punch her and drag her home and call out ‘alpha male’ is the way to go then?

DO NOT

repeat

DO NOT say you asked for advice or even MENTION that you posted on a computing forum.

Instant lose.

And don't expect to get one in either. You'll be lucky if she lets you fondle her funbags on a first date. Unless she's a total whore.

To help you though, I have listed a number of topics for you to bring up if you find the conversation has too many awkward lulls.

- What's your favourite kind of ink?
- Do you find pylons by night romantic?
- Do you like films with horses and girls?
- What did you use as a masturbatory aid when you were younger? I used bottle/Palm Pet/warm compost [delete as appropriate]
- Do you have any cysts?
- Would you describe your vaginal appearance as a rose or a ham sandwich?
- Do midgets bounce if you throw them hard enough?

Alternatively you could sit there and stare at her ear the whole time, pretending to be half blind. When she asks you about it, invent an awful story from your youth involving a local lumberjack, being lost at a parent's evening and a vat of kerosene and say your one wish in life is to have sex after a first date. Repeatedly. Till you're in mortal pain.

If she says no call her an uncompromising harpy and drop the rohypnol.
 
Rich_L's Guide to being Alpha

Preparation

1. Put a bottle of wine in the fridge*
2. As you get ready, get psyched, whatever you usually do, listen to some chooons as you get ready, get your lucky pants/jeans/shirt/whatever on, lil dab of aftershave - ready to go.
3. Have a cheeky shot of something before you go out to warm you up!

*this will make sense later

Date itself

You've had a couple of exchanges already over t'internet so don't greet her like a stranger, it's a dating site after all - greet her confidently with a smile, maybe slip in a cheeky compliment (but not too keen) and give her a peck on the cheek, but approach with your whole body and not just leaning forward, brush your hand on her hip as you do so, she probably wont notice but subconsciously the physical contact will register.

Start off easy, ask how her day's been, ask her if she's been to the place you are meeting before/what she thinks of it - I always find that saying you haven't been somewhere before or only been there once helps break the atmosphere as it transfers some of the nervousness to the surroundings instead of the situation :)

Just remember girls love to talk so go from there - ask some leading questions first off and let her do most of the talking, it'll help ease some of her nervousness and make her feel more comfortable with you, then ease yourself into the conversation. Stay away from 'flash-topics' at the start(race, religion, politics, previous relationships! ) and keep things bubbling along! with small-talk

Remember - lots of eye-contact and smiling. Be expressive (use your hands etc) when you talk as well, it will hold her attention more than simply talking and she'll find you more interesting because of it.

At this point I think it's worth bringing up this vital point - DON'T DRINK TOO MUCH with nervousness, especially when you're listening to her it's tempting to keep sipping your drink, before you know it you'll be hammered :p

Ok, so now you've both loosened up a bit and are chatting away about all sorts of things, you're getting comfortable with each other all's good. Now - you need to step up a gear and the absolute ideal place in my experience is a decent, busy bar with music on in the background and not enough seating room - this forces you to get close to each other to speak, and standing means you are able to step up a notch quite easily by resting your hand on her hip when you talk to her, you have close eye contact and can have a bit of fun.

Sealing the deal - now this'll depend on how she's been reacting to your previous advances, towards the end of the night when she's feeling nicely warmed up as are you, you need to start making the 'uncomfortable silences' :p At a point where a conversation ends, let eye contact and silence last that little bit longer than it would normally and see if she holds it as well - if she does then you're doing well, but you break it off with a smile to let her know it was your doing :cool:

So now you've made it clear that there's a bit of a spark there and more than a little mutual attraction you move on to the endgame, all the chasing is done and the hunt is nearly over. You can go two ways:

1. Go for the kill - when you leave the bar say that you have a bottle of wine back at yours (see start!) thats sitting round waiting to be opened, does she fancy coming back to yours and cracking it open? If she says yes, you are sooo in there....wait till you get back, show her around your place, at an opportune doorway, right hand on her hip, left hand gesturing into room, she turns around to leave..you stay where you are...you end up facing each other very close...eye contact..hold...dip head in for kiss...*Shapow*.

2. Keep her keen - Offer to accompany her back to hers to make sure she gets home ok. On the doorstep or wherever you eventually part ways, hold her hand, eye contact and say you really enjoyed the evening and would like to do it again, hopefully she agrees...cue silence & eye contact, move head slowly in for kiss...*shapow*. As you break kiss, smile and say you should be getting back, but you'll call her to sort out next time...walk off into the distance, maybe a cheeky look over the shoulder to see if she's looking too (awesome if she is because then you're definitely in ) and off you skip to wait for next time.

Hmm, think that covers it - works for me anyway (OMG I've given away my seeekrits!) :p
 
Lysander said:
DO NOT

repeat

DO NOT say you asked for advice or even MENTION that you posted on a computing forum.

Instant lose.

And don't expect to get one in either. You'll be lucky if she lets you fondle her funbags on a first date. Unless she's a total whore.

To help you though, I have listed a number of topics for you to bring up if you find the conversation has too many awkward lulls.

- What did you use as a masturbatory aid when you were younger? I used bottle/Palm Pet/warm compost [delete as appropriate]
- Do you have any cysts?
- Would you describe your vaginal appearance as a rose or a ham sandwich?


Alternatively you could sit there and stare at her ear the whole time, pretending to be half blind. When she asks you about it, invent an awful story from your youth involving a local lumberjack, being lost at a parent's evening and a vat of kerosene and say your one wish in life is to have sex after a first date. Repeatedly. Till you're in mortal pain.

If she says no call her an uncompromising harpy and drop the rohypnol.

:D:D:D

all sound advice!!

:D
 
LOL some of you lot are being awful to this guy! :p

Be yourself, think before you speak (on one of my first dates, about the 4th thing said was a beastiality joke :( ), treat it as meeting a male friend (but dont talk about football or boxing or whatever you might discuss with mates).

Have a good meal before. Meat and potatoes and the like. Something that will take along time to digest. Dont have snacky foods as they'll digest quickly when your nervous. A full stomach will really help to settle you.

Enjoy it. Remember its as much about her seeing if she is good enough / suitable for you as you are for her.
 
Don't
Whisper in her in 10 minutes into the date 'I love you'
Or utter the classic one liner "You know what, your clothes would look so much better on my bed room floor"

Some great comedy replies lads :p :) ooh... and some great advice from Rich_L, stick to that and you can't go far wrong.
Dont try to hard and just be your self at the end of the day if you both hit it off it wont take to much effort.

Good luck :)
 
Last edited:
iv-tecman said:
How best to settle this and what is the best way to meet and greet her? I’m well out of touch with this, and I’m sure she is just as nervous as me, so anything tips wise to ease the meeting?

Looking for good tips, make her laugh perhaps? I always think a quick laugh can ease you out a nervous situation.

Thanks all…. Wish me luck. Sorry for another dating advice thread…

Well done on getting a date. They should be fun and exciting.
As for meeting her, erase all doubt/problems by checking your face, hands and breath in the toilets before you meet her.

When you meet her say "Hello, I'm iv-tecman" and lightly shake her hand.

You gotta be careful with the laughing thing, not everyone has the same sense of humour. (electric buzzer on the hand for example). Just start talking naturally with a few topics of the day and then gauge her personality.

As said already, be yourself. This goes for everyone! There is someone out there for everyone and using the internet is just a broad way of finding that someone. Just be relaxed. Once your comfortable with the dating thing, more dates will come along and then you'll wonder what you did worrying about it.

Have some loose light hearted neutral topical debates on hand:

"If I had a sex change (m2f) would I get cheaper car insurance?"
"What's the 4th most embarrassing situation you've been in?"
"If two female twins had children of two males twins, would they be identical?"

TURN YOUR MOBILE PHONE OFF!! (after you've met up with her, not in front of her).

Please let us all know how it goes.
 
*scribbles down Rich's notes*

I can't see the doorway thing working though, that's a bit too Antonio Banderas for me. :p
 
Back
Top Bottom