I know its already been said, and dismissed as useless, a pen has been a perfect fit on the 3 occasions ive taken door handles off and just left the square hole. They were bic biros and they fit (tight fit) but worked.
DON'T go through the window! I once forgot my keys in my old house and tried to climb through into the house using the quarter height bathroom window. I had to get the wheely bin and stand on it to reach the window then I stood on the window sill and climbed through.
Half of me was through the window, but my fat arse didn't fit and my belt buckle got caught on the window lock part The bin then fell away and I was stuck half in and half out a couple of meters above the ground. I couldnt move because my belt buckle had become jammed against the lock part and my fat arse made sure I didn't have much room to shuffle around as it was cheeks against metal solidly.
I honestly thought I was going to die or have a serious injury that day as I was there for ages shouting for help and the pressure on my stomach was killing me. Luckily a neighbour saw my legs waving out the window and came to my aid as he thought it was a burglar. Was probably the most embarassing moment of my life but thank god he didn't call the police and then they turn up with "Cops on camera" or something!!
Oh lol. Didn't have time to read the whole thread as I'm at work so Ninja reading, but thought I'd quickly put my words of wisdom in! I'll have to see how he escaped when I get home! It's a mystery...
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