Help me sort my head out. :(

lowrider007 said:
It's no use guys, I've seen this before, his under the spell, it don't matter what we say the only way his gonna learn this one is painfully, look, his already lost his house over this and even went back to do it up for her :confused: , that is seriously insane, he needs to think objectively but I'm afriad his in cloud cuckoo land atm and ain't nobody gotta a ticket apart from Mattt-Page it seems.
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Too true, one can't see what's going on from within, it's only afterwards that it's all so bloody obvious. That's part of what mates are for - to keep plugging away until you see sense.
 
lowrider007 said:
It's no use guys, I've seen this before, his under the spell, it don't matter what we say the only way his gonna learn this one is painfully, look, his already lost his house over this and even went back to do it up for her :confused: , that is seriously insane, he needs to think objectively but I'm afriad his in cloud cuckoo land atm and ain't nobody gotta a ticket apart from Mattt-Page it seems.
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It's true love makes you blind.

My mates have been telling me to "bin the bint" for a long time, and again i have been blind to her actions. Re-reading this thread over and over has really hit home. The fact that she dropped a letter off and drove off just shows she knows what i am going to say, but she didn't want to hear it. Whether she likes it or not, i will be either saying it or just ignoring her.

I know that this has gone on too long, and if i had done this from the start i would have recovered by now. There's more out there and i don't mean just woman. I have my own freedom, i can do what i want, when i want, with who i want.

I am currently in work :( as i have to fix some things as everyone else here seems to have no common sense. After that i'm going into town to get some things and then im off with the lads to drink on the way to the airport, at the airport, and then 7 days of more solid drinking. I will try and get some pics and post them in here of me putting her out of my mind and having fun ;)

Cheers again all, i feel so much better for reading all of your comments.
 
Well good luck. Never let a woman do this to you man, shes not worth it. i've been totally heart broken before so i know how you feel, it will pass however.
 
Seen this happen so many times.

I have come to call it 'First Love Syndrome'.. the first love is usually the one who you stop seeing your mates for, do anything for, and when it goes up the swanny you're left emotionally crippled.. the worst part being you don't realise what a tool you look by hanging around trying to rescue the sinking ship.

Best advice (from someone, and no doubt not the only person) with previous experience of a relationship gone sour is to completely forget it and move on.

Took me about a year to get over my first real girlfriend of 4 years and I have to say, the minute I gave up hope and carried on was the best time in my life.. can only offer the same advice here.

If you can stop ringing, texting and/all contact with her, and I bet come October things will be alright :)
 
EVH said:
Seen this happen so many times.

I have come to call it 'First Love Syndrome'.. the first love is usually the one who you stop seeing your mates for, do anything for, and when it goes up the swanny you're left emotionally crippled.. the worst part being you don't realise what a tool you look by hanging around trying to rescue the sinking ship.

Best advice (from someone, and no doubt not the only person) with previous experience of a relationship gone sour is to completely forget it and move on.

Took me about a year to get over my first real girlfriend of 4 years and I have to say, the minute I gave up hope and carried on was the best time in my life.. can only offer the same advice here.

If you can stop ringing, texting and/all contact with her, and I bet come October things will be alright :)
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First Love Syndrome should be on wikipedia. Bet we've all been through that one.
 
Matt-Page said:
I signed the house over to her and got a crappy pay out which was worth nothing.

Since then i have been in contact for periods of time, first off it was because she begged me for help with the house, it wasn't finished so i did it. I finished it all, and it looks amazing.
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You've kind of shot yourself in the foot. She's treated you like ****, move on.
 
First love syndrome... hmm I can relate to that. To be honest I said earlier on in the thread about not cutting contact. I had not spoken to my ex for about a week, got an arsey email at work asking why I hadn't contacted her etc etc and like a mug I replied.

Raked everything up from the past... just kind of happens without you wanting it to.

I can totally understand your situation now as up until a few hours ago my ex had been pretty distant making it much easier to get over her. Not so easy now, feel like i've taken a step back.

Think i can safely hold my hand up and say my advice perhaps wasn't the best previously.
 
Spoonman said:
Are you back from holiday yet? Any news?
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Hey,

sorry for the delayed reply, not on here that often with working away a lot.

Holiday was exactly what i needed. Sun, sand, sea and sex. I got my confidence back and pulled umpteen girls, and found one i quite liked too. Beded her most nights i was there, and some other girls had the pleasure too. I have seen her numerous times since coming back from Kos, she lives about 45mins drive away from me. Things were going great, the sex, the chats, nights out, days out, etc.

BUT

Then came along my ex again, saying she had seen pictures of me and my new lady, and had been missing me a lot. She told me she still doesn't know how she feels, and i don't know why i met up with her. But i did, and we kissed :( I regretted it afterwards but have done it again. Oh and worse of all, she popped round last night on the way back from the theatre where we had sex. Twice. And it was damn good, but now i am regretting it as my head is in a mess and i feel bad for my new girl. My re-aspired confidence has turned be into an arse, and i am chatting up woman left right and centre. I'm going away tonight to Newquay for the weekend with the new girl, and feel bad i have gone behind her back.

Sorry the above is a mess, but again my head is a mess and i'm not sure what to do? Should i tell my ex to sod off, she had her chance, and make a go of it with my new girl? Should i ditch them both and go single? Should i carry on knobbing my ex?

Oh why have i done this. :(
 
To be brutally honest Matt you're your own worst enemy... it's hard to offer sympathy and advice if you're going to be so silly.
 
Matt-Page said:
Oh why have i done this. :(
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Because your spineless and haven't got the balls to say "no", expect it to happen a lot to you, your ex likes having control of you and she has basically ruined it with your new girl, it wouldn't supprise me if she isn't planing on how to tell the new girl of what happened.

Also as a rule

"Only ever have sex with an ex when you are single and you believe it will be better than pleasuring yourself"

KaHn
 
Your ex is jealous that you've moved on so successfully :D

Kick her to the curb, I hope you also feel like **** for cheating on your 'new girl'.
 
Andelusion said:
Your ex is jealous that you've moved on so successfully :D

Kick her to the curb, I hope you also feel like **** for cheating on your 'new girl'.
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Yes i do feel bad, not sure how i'm going to be around her in Newquay, knowing full well what i did with my ex last night.

I'm not sure if i did it for revenge though, because the boot is on her foot now and she is trying to get me back. I feel i have worked my way into a stupid and sorry mess. It seemed like a good idea at the time last night, but now i wish i hadn't. Probably my second brain telling me that.

Should i tell the girl i have just started seeing? It's still early days with her, 3 weeks and have only seen her at weekends. Should i just keep quiet and tell my ex to sod off again? She seems to be a bad penny.....
 
Matt-Page said:
Yes i do feel bad, not sure how i'm going to be around her in Newquay, knowing full well what i did with my ex last night.

I'm not sure if i did it for revenge though, because the boot is on her foot now and she is trying to get me back. I feel i have worked my way into a stupid and sorry mess. It seemed like a good idea at the time last night, but now i wish i hadn't. Probably my second brain telling me that.

Should i tell the girl i have just started seeing? It's still early days with her, 3 weeks and have only seen her at weekends. Should i just keep quiet and tell my ex to sod off again? She seems to be a bad penny.....
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Just read some of this and my answer to that question is there is no answer as you wont take advice anyway so why keep asking, im not being horrible it just you will do what you want anyway and likely get **** on from a great height in a few month when she does completely go off with someone else and you will be back here. No point posting on here about it at all as you will just follow your heart anyway as thats what you have done before, your not strong enough to end it for good.
 
Sorry to hear about this..

i went through the same thing,but i was in florida(pasco county)
my mrs done the same thing to me and i had to come home(god i miss those beaches)

BUT i learned when i had a REAL talk to her..
she said she loved me BUT was not IN love with me mmmmm

so if i was you mate,stop all contact with her and start going out with ya mates
remember your only around here once,so have fun while you can

and i think your being used as a back up for when she got no one to go out with
i know its hard but you just got to do it.
 
schnipps said:
Just read some of this and my answer to that question is there is no answer as you wont take advice anyway so why keep asking, im not being horrible it just you will do what you want anyway and likely get **** on from a great height in a few month when she does completely go off with someone else and you will be back here. No point posting on here about it at all as you will just follow your heart anyway as thats what you have done before, your not strong enough to end it for good.
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I did take the advice to some extent, i told her i didn't want her to contact me, but she did after a while.

I'm an idiot and i should have listened. Your right, i have ignored the advice, and i don't know why i did/do it. This is an un-comfortable mess and i wish she had left me along to be happy without her. I think i would be pleased if she found someone else, because it would leave me with someone else, and not being bothered by her. Don't know why i posted back really, just because i saw someone had repelied to one of my threads. I guess they are questions that are i am asking or should be asking myself.

The only one i can't figure out an answer for is WHY. WHY did i sleep with her and why do i keep doing this to myself? Why can't i just be rid of her and be strong not to talk to her if she phones.
 
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