Infuriating things friends do...

Soldato
Joined
18 Dec 2008
Posts
5,679
Location
Liverpool
So a friend of mine tells me he is moving home and has a bed frame he no longer needs, its not brilliant but its pretty sturdy and looks okay, having been sleeping on a mattress on the floor for several weeks I'm naturally quite keen. He drops the bed frame off at 9pm and tells me it shouldn't take me long to put together, there must be about 15 pieces, dozens of screws and no instructions. I ask him if he can just give us a clue as to how it all goes together but he makes excuses and clears off pretty sharpish! Being fairly competent at flat pack furniture I start the process of assembling the bed frame only to find that most of the dowels are snapped, broken or simply missing, Screws look like they have been ripped out of place, rendering the chipboard screw holes useless and there appears to be one or two bits missing..... suffice to say the bed frame is not in a usable state as cannot be put back together... I find it hard to believe that my friend would just dump his crap on me, but no care has been taken in taking it apart and despite no instructions he seemed eager to get away as fast as he could.

I feel like I've had crap dumped on me and that I should be grateful, my friend wont have the van he hired for moving tomorrow so I'm now going to have to dispose of this crap myself.... calling the council to come and remove it at expense to myself. I'm currently unemployed etc see "http://forums.overclockers.co.uk/showthread.php?t=18520380" for information on my current situation.....

Question is do I have a right to be ****** off? I know he has done some slightly botched jobs for me in the past when I was with the ex but destroying a bed frame and then dumping on me seems a bit much.... what do you lot think?

Also what really irritating things have some of your friends done?
 

mjt

mjt

Soldato
Joined
31 Aug 2007
Posts
19,481
This person is not a friend.
Do you not know anyone with a van?
Dump this **** on his front lawn.
And the take a dump on his bed.
 
Soldato
Joined
4 Mar 2010
Posts
5,038
So a friend of mine tells me he is moving home and has a bed frame he no longer needs, its not brilliant but its pretty sturdy and looks okay, having been sleeping on a mattress on the floor for several weeks I'm naturally quite keen. He drops the bed frame off at 9pm and tells me it shouldn't take me long to put together, there must be about 15 pieces, dozens of screws and no instructions. I ask him if he can just give us a clue as to how it all goes together but he makes excuses and clears off pretty sharpish! Being fairly competent at flat pack furniture I start the process of assembling the bed frame only to find that most of the dowels are snapped, broken or simply missing, Screws look like they have been ripped out of place, rendering the chipboard screw holes useless and there appears to be one or two bits missing..... suffice to say the bed frame is not in a usable state as cannot be put back together... I find it hard to believe that my friend would just dump his crap on me, but no care has been taken in taking it apart and despite no instructions he seemed eager to get away as fast as he could.

I feel like I've had crap dumped on me and that I should be grateful, my friend wont have the van he hired for moving tomorrow so I'm now going to have to dispose of this crap myself.... calling the council to come and remove it at expense to myself. I'm currently unemployed etc see "http://forums.overclockers.co.uk/showthread.php?t=18520380" for information on my current situation.....

Question is do I have a right to be ****** off? I know he has done some slightly botched jobs for me in the past when I was with the ex but destroying a bed frame and then dumping on me seems a bit much.... what do you lot think?

Also what really irritating things have some of your friends done?
Sounds like a pain in the arse, mate.

Thought about calling him and asking if he can help to take it to the recycling centre as it's unusable?

As for myself it used to be a friend being unreliable, we're not friends anymore; it always felt like a very one sided relationship.
 
Man of Honour
Joined
25 Oct 2002
Posts
30,272
Location
Hampshire
Difficult one; on the one hand I can see how someone who is moving house is probably genuinely busy/knackered with a truckload more stuff to sort out, so the last thing they will want to be doing at 9pm is faffing about putting someone elses bed together, they have enough **** to take care of. So the fact he 'did a runner' isn't necessarily incriminating in itself.

On the other hand, the condition of the bed is concerning. Whenever we gift hand-me-down's to others, we normally only suggest decent quality items or if there is any doubt we make the flaws clear to the recipient.

My personal guess of what happened is this, assuming he is a genuine friend and giving him the benefit of the doubt:

1) Mate offers you the bed earlier in the day with the best of intentions. He doesn't need it any more, you do.
2) House move takes longer than expected in terms of clearing the old house
3) Time is pressing on and after a day slogging his guts out he is thinking "FFS I still needs to get this bloody bed over to Vidar"
4) We're now into the evening, and after a hardcore day of house moving all he wants to do is just get this bed apart and drop it off. So he takes it apart without due care and attention, something breaks, and he thinks "**** it" and just speeds up even more, it's already broken a bit right, what's a couple of extra dowels?
5) Finally is able to drop it off at 9pm and now wants to get back to his new home and start putting his own bed together / unpacking / take meter readings / whatever. Vidar has plenty of free time to sort the old bed out, if he can. He might run into problems, and I sure as hell don't want to be sat here for hours trying to botch it together tonight.
 
Last edited:
Soldato
Joined
14 Aug 2008
Posts
3,709
Location
L19
Just this evening I find myself giving serious thought to ending a friendship that's endured for pretty half my life.

The friend in question has become unreliable to a point where I'm wondering why I even bother contacting him anymore. Every time I try to make plans it seems he'll either just completely blank my attempts to make contact (texts will go unanswered, his phone goes to voicemail when I try to call). Or when I do manage to get in touch and we make arrangements, he then almost always cancels. Very, very rarely do plans ever come to anything.

I accept, some of this may be my fault, I've been going through a change of career these past three years, and as a consequence I've spent these last three years mostly either at college at the other end of the country, or at sea. But when I'm home I always try to see my friends, and I try to stay in touch in other ways, like Facebook, Skype etc.

But this guy just seems to have already written me off, which is a sad realisation when I look back at all we've been through together these past fifteen years. But from my perspective, it looks like the friendship's already over according to him.
 
Soldato
Joined
4 Mar 2010
Posts
5,038
Just this evening I find myself giving serious thought to ending a friendship that's endured for pretty half my life.

The friend in question has become unreliable to a point where I'm wondering why I even bother contacting him anymore. Every time I try to make plans it seems he'll either just completely blank my attempts to make contact (texts will go unanswered, his phone goes to voicemail when I try to call). Or when I do manage to get in touch and we make arrangements, he then almost always cancels. Very, very rarely do plans ever come to anything.

I accept, some of this may be my fault, I've been going through a change of career these past three years, and as a consequence I've spent these last three years mostly either at college at the other end of the country, or at sea. But when I'm home I always try to see my friends, and I try to stay in touch in other ways, like Facebook, Skype etc.

But this guy just seems to have already written me off, which is a sad realisation when I look back at all we've been through together these past fifteen years. But from my perspective, it looks like the friendship's already over according to him.

It's hard man, but really if he's ignoring you just leave him to it.

I've found that with good friends you don't necessarily have to see them often but it's always fantastic to catch up. Because that true bond of friendship is timeless.

Sometimes though people, just drift apart.
 
Soldato
Joined
18 Dec 2008
Posts
5,679
Location
Liverpool
Turns out my so called made actually did dump a pile of crap on me, knew it was borked..... but figured I'd be able to fix it, erm????

Fuming is not the word id use to describe what I am over this!
 
Joined
10 May 2004
Posts
11,991
Location
Sunny Stafford
I have a friend who likes his clothing shops a little too much. One day in the Bull Ring, I kept a count on the number of shoe shops he dragged me into. I counted 11 in the end and he didn't even buy a sodding pair! We get on well and we love our cafés - just that's is his one trait I find annoying.
 
Soldato
Joined
25 Jan 2003
Posts
9,496
I don't have many friends that haven't **** on me at some stage!

I plan a life of being a loner! Its much bloody easier :D
 
Top Bottom