Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

secretspy · 24 Aug 2011 at 18:08

I just had a rather long message that I had to keep taking deep breaths to read because it's so continous. Quite funny but I can't tell if they have written it that way on purpose of if they generally are like that

Also one of the cute guys I have been messaging sent me a fairly long message yesterday, I responded but tried to keep it short and only did a sentence or two to answer each thing he asked. His reply barely acknowledged most of my message and was about two sentences long :confused:

wha....

00bob00 · 24 Aug 2011 at 19:04

i wouldn't dwell on it, if somebody wants to catch up, they'll do so at their own convenience at a later stage, i mean, they might be writing stuff on phones or at work.

Anyway, I moved to london about a couple of months ago and wanted to meet more people/go on dates as I don't really know too many people anymore. My new housemate had recently joined a dating website called tastebuds, which determines matches based on musical taste, since I absolutely love music, i did exactly the same.

http://www.tastebuds.fm

It's not exactly been an overwhelming experience so far but i do recommend it if you like your music, as you can see what events/gigs others are going to and see if anyone wants to join you etc. I like the idea of connecting with someone on music taste, as personality wise, you'd think they'd be similar, looks are great but i think personality is where it matters the most.

I've been a member for a few weeks now and been on a couple of dates but maybe it's time to join another site - so okcupid or pof?

Sinny · 24 Aug 2011 at 19:54

Morgoth said:
OKCupid is also decent and free.

I've had 3 dates from okcupid, 0 from plenty of fish (nearly had one but she turned out to be larger than what I was led to beleive) ( I also could have had 4 but she didn't reply for a week with no valid reason, so I didn't reply back).

Definitely a better site, I think girls take it more seriously as well. Had a long chat with my uncle today about PoF who seems to call it Plenty of muff.com.

wozza2k · 24 Aug 2011 at 21:45

I just joined the joys of POF for a bit of a laugh

http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=13513641 < thats my profile, whats my chances then?

secretspy · 24 Aug 2011 at 21:51

When you say "for a bit of a laugh" are you doing it to take the mic or do you actually want to make a few friends?

If so I'd remove the references about needing a visa etc. The headline has it (i take it, its a joke) but carrying it on in the profile just makes it a bit OTT.

perhaps add a more sensible picture as well?

Prophet · 24 Aug 2011 at 22:15

Sinny said:
I've had 3 dates from okcupid, 0 from plenty of fish (nearly had one but she turned out to be larger than what I was led to beleive) ( I also could have had 4 but she didn't reply for a week with no valid reason, so I didn't reply back).

Definitely a better site, I think girls take it more seriously as well. Had a long chat with my uncle today about PoF who seems to call it Plenty of muff.com.

I would have to completely disagree with that. I was on both sites for nearly 2 years. I went on over 40 date through PoF and 4 from OKcupid.

In my experience PoF is far superior for dating. Better user interface and searches, more people online in my area and generally easier to use.

Gzero · 24 Aug 2011 at 22:43

Orange Peel said:
I would have to completely disagree with that. I was on both sites for nearly 2 years. I went on over 40 date through PoF and 4 from OKcupid.

In my experience PoF is far superior for dating. Better user interface and searches, more people online in my area and generally easier to use.

And that's the crux of the matter, you are either chav or indie/rock, *ahem*.

It is all dependent on your area really, just do a search and checkout the results, but it certainly doesn't hurt to have an account on each to log into (important bit: log in regularly).

Prophet · 24 Aug 2011 at 22:47

Gzero said:
And that's the crux of the matter, you are either chav or indie/rock, *ahem*.

It is all dependent on your area really, just do a search and checkout the results, but it certainly doesn't hurt to have an account on each to log into (important bit: log in regularly).

What? You're saying I'm a chav or indie/rock?

Gzero · 24 Aug 2011 at 23:18

Orange Peel said:
What? You're saying I'm a chav or indie/rock?

Neither, but those seem to be the social groupings in my area with a few exceptions.

Prophet · 24 Aug 2011 at 23:29

Gzero said:
Neither, but those seem to be the social groupings in my area with a few exceptions.

Oh I see!

As internet dating allows you to filter out unwanted traits I searched for women 25-35, within 15 miles, average height, slim/athletic build and obviously those I also found attractive.

Saying that I only ever emailed around 10 women the whole time I was online and all but 3 dates were with women who had emailed me first.

I'm starting to miss PoF so may have to break out the profile again

ChroniC · 25 Aug 2011 at 01:27

I really don't know what to do.........
I have been on a second date with a girl who is good looking, she's ok conversation, but she's really firey and shouty.
I like her, but she's not exactly what I'm looking for, and I have enough messages from equally pretty girls, but I don't know if they'll all be slightly not what I'm looking for.

Sounds like I'm being picky, but I don't know whether to sack her off and try again, how many 2 date attempts does it take or should I perceiver and see if something grows after more than 2, or just start again with the next pretty girl.

Zefan · 25 Aug 2011 at 01:35

ChroniC, see her again, and also see the other girls. Simples!

ChroniC · 25 Aug 2011 at 01:41

Yeh but if I start tell girl 1 I like her, then I start also seeing girl 2, and like her more, but by this time, I'm at daate number 5 and possibly more

How can I tell her its no more. That's hard.

secretspy · 25 Aug 2011 at 18:17

00bob00 said:
i wouldn't dwell on it, if somebody wants to catch up, they'll do so at their own convenience at a later stage, i mean, they might be writing stuff on phones or at work.

True.

It's hard to explain but I'm just not getting that excited feeling that I've had before :confused:

at first I got the reply and thought "yey

" but just from how the conversation has gone it doesn't seem like he's overly interested. He's just not very chatty.

Who knows...I've said I'm happy to meet up soon so will find out then I guess. I hope it's not really awkward lol.

Broken Hope · 25 Aug 2011 at 18:22

Some people are better face to face rather than through text, least you've made the move forward suggesting you would like to meet.

Morgoth · 25 Aug 2011 at 18:23

Sinny said:
I've had 3 dates from okcupid, 0 from plenty of fish (nearly had one but she turned out to be larger than what I was led to beleive) ( I also could have had 4 but she didn't reply for a week with no valid reason, so I didn't reply back).

I had pretty much the same experience, the quality of matches was much better on OKCupid.

secretspy · 25 Aug 2011 at 18:34

Broken Hope said:
Some people are better face to face rather than through text, least you've made the move forward suggesting you would like to meet.

Good point.

I guess it doesn't help that I'm really tired right now and perhaps it's just that I put effort in constantly and it all goes belly up eventually.
I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much about things because they always seem to go wrong lol.

I'm also trying a new tactic where I'm not telling anyone (except on here of course) that I'm back pof or arranging dates etc.
Although when I do go to meet a guy I will tell my best mate so that at least someone knows where I am going.

sigma · 25 Aug 2011 at 18:43

secretspy said:
Good point.

I guess it doesn't help that I'm really tired right now and perhaps it's just that I put effort in constantly and it all goes belly up eventually.
I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much about things because they always seem to go wrong lol.

I'm also trying a new tactic where I'm not telling anyone (except on here of course) that I'm back pof or arranging dates etc.
Although when I do go to meet a guy I will tell my best mate so that at least someone knows where I am going.

Maybe you need to put less effort in.

Broken Hope · 25 Aug 2011 at 19:01

secretspy said:
Good point.

I guess it doesn't help that I'm really tired right now and perhaps it's just that I put effort in constantly and it all goes belly up eventually.
I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much about things because they always seem to go wrong lol.

I'm also trying a new tactic where I'm not telling anyone (except on here of course) that I'm back pof or arranging dates etc.
Although when I do go to meet a guy I will tell my best mate so that at least someone knows where I am going.

As said maybe not put too much effort in, and just take it pretty casually, that way I hope you won't be so hurt if things don't turn out how you like and from reading previous posts you make a point of calling them 'cute' guys, I know there has to be physical attraction in a relationship, but I assume you're also making sure you have things in common, or are at least compatible in other ways other than if you find them cute?

secretspy · 25 Aug 2011 at 20:30

I purely meant I make the effort to get to know someone and then it turns out they are just not that interested at all. I'm just trying to see if perhaps there are signs of this that I'm not spotting.
On my pof account it says I'm just looking for friends right now and there are a few people I'm chatting to as friends and have no romantic interest in so when I say "cute guys" I'm merely talking about the ones where there is possibly a chance for a date to happen i.e. they're not miles away, there's an attraction and we have things in common.

I'm certainly not just messaging any good looking guy. There have been plenty that I've looked at but after reading their profile I've realised they're completely different and not my type.