Men, do you like to measure things?

[Scuzi]

I met a chap just like you when I visited Manchester a few years ago. He wanted to measure my biceps and quads as I was coming out of Greggs.

 

[Uther]

I'm not insane.

You sure about that? I mean,over 20,000 posts on an internet forum...

 

[sigma]

You sure about that? I mean,over 20,000 posts on an internet forum...

First the Christmas pudding now an attack on my lyfe

 

[Chojin]

I took a ruler to court one time to measure the case documents. Judge said I would get a lengthy sentence.

 

[bainbridge]

I make estimations of distance while maintaining an air of absolute certainty. "Over by that tree, 60 metres away". That sort of thing.

 

[sigma]

I took a ruler to court one time to measure the case documents. Judge said I would get a lengthy sentence.

Did the jury take it in turns to slip you a length?

 

[Chojin]

Did the jury take it in turns to slip you a length?

Fortunately the jury's moral compass remained intact.

 

[sigma]

Fortunately the jury's moral compass remained intact.

Ain't got time for morals when lengths are concerned y0!

 

[[FnG]magnolia]

Every now and then I randomly get the urge to measure the dimensions of the rooms in my flat.

Do they ever change?

 

[dlockers]

Oh I saw this on task master, you're supposed to dunk it in a bucket of water.

Edit: wait I'm thinking of cubed meters but maybe that's assuming too much

My wife did this with her baps once

 

[sigma]

Fortunately the jury's moral compass remained intact.

Also, first rule of fight club, don't take a compass to a ruler fight.

 

[Stu999]

Do they ever change?

Depends if I’ve had a drink or not.

 

[FBi7]

Measure twice. Cut once.

 

[sigma]

My wife did this with her baps once

Pics? Oh wait, I'll just look at the ones she sent yesterday.

 

[sigma]

Depends if I’ve had a drink or not.

That's what @dlockers wife said

 

[~Divine~Wind~]

P.S. I am not drunk.

Denial!

 

[Puzzled]

Measure twice. Cut once.

Realise you still managed to get it wrong, shave a bit more off and then bodge it in.

Job done

 

[FBi7]

Realise you still managed to get it wrong, shave a bit more off and then bodge it in.

Job done

Beats using filler

And in keeping with the ethos of the thread, ooh er!

 

[darkblade]

P.S. I am not drunk.

Shame, as that would have made sense. There are worse quirks to have I guess!

 

[sigma]

Beats using filler

And in keeping with the ethos of the thread, ooh er!

Holes are made to be filled! Whip the tube out, stick the nozzle in, squeeze, gap filled!