OcUK Dadsnet thread

NVP · 16 Aug 2017 at 14:03

Devrij said:
I liked the baby owners manual (some useful tips on how to swaddle a baby and other practical stuff). Generally speaking within a week of feeling like you're blagging it you're officially a qualified dad though.

Thank you, Yeh I think the encyclopedia style will be more beneficial to me for referencing and knowledge as opposed to the story/comedy ones.

booyaka said:
Trust me your address - I've got a book that I was given years back - you can have it.

Thank you that is kind of you, but only if you allow me to pay the postage.

Tunney said:
I read a few but found them to be patronising claptrap.

Yeh those are the ones I'd prefer to avoid. There seems to be so many though!

xyphic said:
Hope all goes okay for you and your wife. I don't think that books will give you what you're after in terms of reassurance -- no matter what you learn about the theory behind parenting, it generally all goes out of the window and you find your own groove. My suggestion is to participate as much as you can -- don't be afraid to change nappies, take baby for cuddles / naps, feed (if bottle feeding), etc. Your wife will appreciate it!

It *is* worth reading up a bit on safe sleeping and like others suggest, a support network will help you deal with the lack of sleep and stress that comes with being woken several times a night.

Big Spender said:
agree with the above. every baby is different and you will find your own way of doing things, its not as difficult as you may think, it'll become second nature in no time at all. Help mum out as much as you can with nappy changes, bottle feeds, putting baby down for naps etc. You may think if your wife isn't working and only dealing with baby that it'll be easy for her, it isn't, mum needs a rest too. When i come home from my full time job i do as much as i can, we take turns each night putting baby to bed etc.

Thank you very much for the kind words. I'm always attentive and helpful, to a point I sometimes annoy my wife haha so I've no concerns there, my main motive is to gain knowledge of symptoms/behaviours that could be a signal of any concern that I would not want to miss. And also for useful quick referencing for the "firsts".

subbytna · 16 Aug 2017 at 14:30

I'm on a "dads of multiples" facebook page and I know a few dads there who have triplets. I just got chatting to a fella from Iowa USA, he has (boy, boy, girl)triplets who are 20 months old.....and his wife is expecting triplets again at xmas :eek:

I really can't put into words how hard this will be for him. I feel like I should buy the guy a pint. Words fail me at how hectic his life will be. I think I have it hard with twins (plus an older daughter) but to have 6 kids 2 years old or under..... Holy Moly Batman!!! :eek:

NVP · 16 Aug 2017 at 15:47

Wow that's madness! IVF?

Has anyone done a pre-clean of prams/car seats/cots before first use? If so, what with?

Ours smell a bit "factory fresh" and I was wondering if they needed sterilising/cleaning in addition to simply airing them out?

Thanks

PAz · 16 Aug 2017 at 16:02

Long haul flights with a 1 year old......any tips?

I travel to the US frequently and with the Mrs being stay at home I'd like to take her and the boy next time - but a little nervous about the jet lag and flight length (9-10 hours)

Tunney · 16 Aug 2017 at 16:07

PAz said:
Long haul flights with a 1 year old......any tips?

Can your boy walk yet? It's a lot easier before they have the desire to run around constantly. Should be easy enough if there's two of you as you can take shifts keeping him entertained.

Not much you can do about the jet lag AFAIK. My only advice would be to buy him his own seat if you can afford it. Most airlines don't make you buy a seat for under-2s but you'll appreciate having somewhere he can snooze that isn't your lap!

ShortWarning · 16 Aug 2017 at 16:15

We

PAz said:
Long haul flights with a 1 year old......any tips?

I travel to the US frequently and with the Mrs being stay at home I'd like to take her and the boy next time - but a little nervous about the jet lag and flight length (9-10 hours)

We did a 5 hour flight when our daughter was 10 months (she couldn't walk). She was strapped to either me or mum. There's no easy way really. Unless he sleeps the whole way he's more than likely going to get bored, fidgety etc. Ours cried a bit but she was fairly well behaved. Changing nappies in the plane toilet is a pain.

Overall, there's nothing particularly fun about flying with a baby. We have another one due any time and really I don't want to go abroad till he's at least 2 because of how much of a pain flying is.

We also flew for a couple of hours when she was 18 months. Still a pain but slightly easier to entertain (and the grand parents were on the flight which helped

).

Big Spender · 16 Aug 2017 at 16:54

my daughter will be 21 months old when we go on our first flight together to Majorca next month. She's at the stage where she'll just want to get off our laps and run around, i'm dreading it. Going to struggle to keep her entertained. She'll be sat on my knee at the window, my wife in the middle seat, then a poor soul in the aisle seat who will have to put up with us. It is an early morning flight (06:05) so hopefully she'll sleep for a bit then she can have her usual morning milk on the plane about 7 if she's awake.

booyaka · 16 Aug 2017 at 17:01

PAz said:
Long haul flights with a 1 year old......any tips?

I travel to the US frequently and with the Mrs being stay at home I'd like to take her and the boy next time - but a little nervous about the jet lag and flight length (9-10 hours)

I took my son to NYC when he was 9 months old - no bother. Slept for about 5 hours on the way out and back. (7 hour flight) Take plenty of feed/milk, a few things to amuse them and go with the flow.

It's not that bad unless we got lucky with ours.

PAz · 16 Aug 2017 at 17:10

Thanks all - much appreciated - he is walking/running/climbing all over the place. We've several short haul flights already but long term is a different story.

Not sure whether to book a night flight or a day flight....

Big Spender · 16 Aug 2017 at 18:44

PAz said:
Thanks all - much appreciated - he is walking/running/climbing all over the place. We've several short haul flights already but long term is a different story.

Not sure whether to book a night flight or a day flight....

A night flight would probably be better I'd imagine. More chance of them just sleeping through it

xyphic · 18 Aug 2017 at 10:34

PAz said:
Long haul flights with a 1 year old......any tips?

I travel to the US frequently and with the Mrs being stay at home I'd like to take her and the boy next time - but a little nervous about the jet lag and flight length (9-10 hours)

Don't worry about jet lag too much, little one should cope. If he's running around a lot, your best bet is probably to aim for a night flight and (assuming your budget allows) buy him a seat and take a car seat. That way you'll be able to strap him in. Taking a toddler without a separate seat is hard because you'll have to have him strapped to your lap when the seatbelt signs are on and if he falls asleep he'll be comfy but you won't!

Stretch · 18 Aug 2017 at 15:53

subbytna said:
I'm on a "dads of multiples" facebook page and I know a few dads there who have triplets. I just got chatting to a fella from Iowa USA, he has (boy, boy, girl)triplets who are 20 months old.....and his wife is expecting triplets again at xmas I really can't put into words how hard this will be for him. I feel like I should buy the guy a pint. Words fail me at how hectic his life will be. I think I have it hard with twins (plus an older daughter) but to have 6 kids 2 years old or under..... Holy Moly Batman!!!

It's not possible to look after 6. They must have help?

subbytna · 18 Aug 2017 at 16:49

Stretch said:
It's not possible to look after 6. They must have help?

Having went through over a year and a half without proper sleep with my twin boys, before they finally started to sleep through the night, I can't imagine what triplets would be like, then I can't imagine what two sets of triplets would be like. It hurts my brain even thinking about it. Poor guy must be dreading it. It will be BRUTAL. No other word comes close to trying to describe that scenario for him.

scratch · 18 Aug 2017 at 17:59

The gf and I are expecting our first baby in March. It's not been the easiest of starts as she's had some spotting on several occasions, but we've had 2 early scans now and they can't find any obvious cause, so we've been told not to worry. Baby is healthy and growing as expected, so fingers crossed it stays that way.

My sister is currently in labour as well, so in the space of 7 months I'll be an uncle and a dad

paradigm · 18 Aug 2017 at 18:04

Wife and I had our first child delivered by emergency c section last night at 22:49. He was 11 days overdue, and we were in the throws of a lengthy natural labour process until we reached a point where mum stopped making any progress for a lengthy period.

Good news is that both mum and son are doing fine now, weighing in at 7lb 12oz and is feeding and "moving" like a trooper.

Beaming right now, though I'm sure the nerves will kick in when it gets to discharge time!

booyaka · 18 Aug 2017 at 18:13

paradigm said:
Wife and I had our first child delivered by emergency c section last night at 22:49. He was 11 days overdue, and we were in the throws of a lengthy natural labour process until we reached a point where mum stopped making any progress for a lengthy period.

Good news is that both mum and son are doing fine now, weighing in at 7lb 12oz and is feeding and "moving" like a trooper.

Beaming right now, though I'm sure the nerves will kick in when it gets to discharge time!

excellent - congrats.

I remeber the first time leaving the hospital and having to put a baby in my car/fasten the seat in/taking him into our house. We both just sat down with the baby and looked at each other as if to say - "what now"......

Lol - 10 years ago and I remember it well

ci_newman · 18 Aug 2017 at 18:15

Congrats

get as much sleep as you can now before they are discharged

Big Spender · 19 Aug 2017 at 09:55

booyaka said:
excellent - congrats.

I remeber the first time leaving the hospital and having to put a baby in my car/fasten the seat in/taking him into our house. We both just sat down with the baby and looked at each other as if to say - "what now"......

Lol - 10 years ago and I remember it well

Yep. I think every parent goes through the exact same thing. You get home and suddenly there is this tiny human and our first though was the same, "what do we do now?" Haha

paradigm · 19 Aug 2017 at 23:02

Well we've now been home since around 3pm and so far so good, I'd be kidding myself if I didn't say the prospect of tonight doesn't scare the bejebus out of me, trying not to let this fear be visible to my wife though!

Mark1989 · 20 Aug 2017 at 06:52

Big Spender said:
Yep. I think every parent goes through the exact same thing. You get home and suddenly there is this tiny human and our first though was the same, "what do we do now?" Haha

When we brought our son home that's exactly what me and the Mrs did lol, on first night we were also said huh how do nights work now