Platonic relationship weirdness?

krooton said:
Most of modern life and society is unnatural, doesn't mean we cannot adapt or embrace it. :p

Well, we're going to the movies on Wednesday, then the weekend after this one we are have a movie weekend at mine (buying a new 32" TV soon). Dvds, good food and lots of wine.

Yay for wine!
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I've realised why this is happening either;
1. You're gay.
2. She thinks you're gay.
 
I envy of your situation actually.

I see both sides of the argument with platonic love, but with me, I certainly am platonic with a lot of attractive girls I know so I'm leaning on the "wimpy" lot.

It's a psychological thing for me - I need the other person to embody a certain character trait before developing intimate feelings. Doesn't matter if someone fulfills my ridiculous standard of beauty to perfection, without certain personality I simply can't find interest.
So I inevitably stay platonic with a lot of girls because I'm a nut case.

On the other hand I crave physical intimacy in a non-sexual capacity... I genuinely enjoyed cradling a girl in my arms, sleeping next to each other without going any further, that sort of stuff you usually only see on tv.

But then I simply can't share my personal space at that level with someone I'm platonic with... :(
 
KittensCake said:
He said it's human instinct to want to reproduce as much as possible. Where is he getting that from? If it varies from person to person, some people barely feeling sexual desire at all...etc, it's like a spectrum, so how can you say any point on the spectrum IS human instinct? If he said it's human instinct to want to reproduce, then maybe that would be correct, but to say it's human instinct to want to reproduce as much as possible is just wrong.
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This is why I love these forums, there is more BS thrown about than between the ramblings of drunken people up town on a Saturday night.
 
thesubstitute said:
I envy of your situation actually.

I see both sides of the argument with platonic love, but with me, I certainly am platonic with a lot of attractive girls I know so I'm leaning on the "wimpy" lot.

It's a psychological thing for me - I need the other person to embody a certain character trait before developing intimate feelings. Doesn't matter if someone fulfills my ridiculous standard of beauty to perfection, without certain personality I simply can't find interest.
So I inevitably stay platonic with a lot of girls because I'm a nut case.

On the other hand I crave physical intimacy in a non-sexual capacity... I genuinely enjoyed cradling a girl in my arms, sleeping next to each other without going any further, that sort of stuff you usually only see on tv.

But then I simply can't share my personal space at that level with someone I'm platonic with... :(
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I'm very similar mate, I don't develop feelings unless I feel the minimum level of compatibility is met, and whilst I get on with this girl very well, I know it would not work at as a relationship, so it never moves beyond that.

Now I have done this countless times over the years, but it's the added level of physical intimacy that prompted the thread.

As I said, I have no problem with it, just haven't experienced it before, and was curious as to how common it is.

Turns out it pretty much never happens :D
 
Mr Jack said:
Platonic relationships are great; I feel sorry for men who seem unable to grasp the concept.
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Yup, I had a couple of really good girl mates at uni and we used to chill together for hours, watch films etc all the time, and none of us ever even hinted at anything more than friends... it just never needed to be brought up and there was never any awkwardness. We just genuinely didn't fancy each-other, it was great.

I usually find it's the two extremes that hold the: "Men and woman can never just be friends" opinion... those who get ****-all contact with women and end up sexually repressed deviants (probably a good 80% of people on here) yet for some unknown reason seem to think they are really wise about the ways of women and love to quote all the tripe about genetics (Lysander i'm looking at you)... and those who get too many women and are always looking for their next shag (considerably less on here I imagine).

For those of us that don't view every women as a potential ****, just 'being friends' isn't unheard of.
 
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Skyfall said:
You're not?
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Uhhh, no? It's called sex drive. It's different for everyone. That's not the instinct itself, it's just a variable of that instinct, so like I said before to say it's human instinct to want to reproduce as much as possible is wrong. The instinct is the desire to reproduce, not the frequency of that desire.
 
KittensCake said:
Uhhh, no? It's called sex drive. It's different for everyone. That's not the instinct itself, it's just a variable of that instinct, so like I said before to say it's human instinct to want to reproduce as much as possible is wrong. The instinct is the desire to reproduce, not the frequency of that desire.
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If this poster is a man I will eat this forum

Skyfall said:
You're not?
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Hence my reasons for asking "its" sex :)
 
Richdog said:
I usually find it's the two extremes that hold the: "Men and woman can never just be friends" opinion... those who get ****-all contact with women and end up sexually repressed deviants (probably a good 80% of people on here) yet for some unknown reason seem to think they are really wise about the ways of women and love to quote all the tripe about genetics (Lysander i'm looking at you)... and those who get too many women and are always looking for their next shag (considerably less on here I imagine).

For those of us that don't view every women as a potential ****, just 'being friends' isn't unheard of.
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Or, to use your argument technique, you're either a raging homosexual or were meant to have been born a girl :)
 
I thought you were getting married?! Jeez, you don't come into GD for a week and everything goes mad.
 
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