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posts removed, can't even remember what I posted tbh
Race report: 'UK not deliberately rigged against ethnic minorities'
- Thread starter Skunkworks
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Soldato
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I have had my first post deleted- for quoting a deleted post.
I'm not sure whether to be proud of that, or not.
I'm not sure whether to be proud of that, or not.
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I've poured a vodka to celebrate the cherry popping
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I do agree with this, but the fact is that there are no laws to protect against just bullying / verbal harassment in the workplace. Hence a lot of people end up resorting to calling it racism to get it dealt with.
One thing to remember is that most of the people that actually get offended by this kind of stuff are white co workers of the target, like the one that was offended when it happened to me. Its not necessarily BAME people calling it racism, but HR most certainly will put it down as that.
The amount of times I've heard Sean, Siobhan, Helena, Niamh etc mispronounced, and then surnames that require the NATO alphabet to be pulled out . Clearly all racist (/jokes). And the perps are from all races, countries and cultures.
I've worked with people that are hopeless with names. Even "white" names. I don't see it as malicious in anyway, but do accept there will be times when it is and I'll bet it won't be the only issue if the person is indeed a racist acting out in racist ways.
Just experiencing the act of getting a name wrong as proof of racism? I don't agree with that, but do accept it can be part of an overall racist attitude from a group or individual, as yet again it's a difference to be targeted by those with that horrid disposition about them.
I've worked with people that are hopeless with names. Even "white" names. I don't see it as malicious in anyway, but do accept there will be times when it is and I'll bet it won't be the only issue if the person is indeed a racist acting out in racist ways.
Just experiencing the act of getting a name wrong as proof of racism? I don't agree with that, but do accept it can be part of an overall racist attitude from a group or individual, as yet again it's a difference to be targeted by those with that horrid disposition about them.
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Imagine still not being capable of asking someone 'How do I pronounce your name?' in 2021.
Of course there are laws against bullying and harassment...
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No there arent, unless it also applies to 'List of protected characteristics'.
If you don't think name discrimination counts as racial then that is fine, make a new category for it then.
NGL would be fun to rip the mick out of football / cricket fans that can't shut up about talking about sports for even 2 seconds, and that wouldn't count as harassment because sports / hobbies arent a protected characteristic.
You can crack on and why shouldn't you be able to. The world needs to regain some sort of perspective and realise that life is ******* dull when everyone is boring and vanilla and completely inoffensive.
I climb a lot and most of the people who climb are the kids that were **** at sport when they were younger and have a healthy distain for football, rugby etc. I love both and couldn't care less when they try to take the **** out of other sports or sports fans. I'm not a 5 year old. I can handle someone taking the **** without it ruining my week.
There is plenty of stuff that we shouldn't joke about directly or take the **** out of but that list is pretty small.
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Le cricket fan at one of my jobs got ****** off and reported me to management because I told him 'Look, I am here to work and do my job, not talk to you, leave me alone'. Management told him 'What do you want us to do about that? That's just what he's like'.
Alternatively I could tell any such employers 'small talk is wonderful and great. If any colleague or customer wants to chat with me about anything I would welcome it and fully engage in conversation with them. However I will not do any work while chatting with them'.
I'm working or I'm being distracted. Works fine for customers because of 'Stop what you're doing and help the customer'. Wish that also applied to colleagues that never shut their mouths.
Honestly you sound robotic and very easily offended. Part of going to work is getting on with your colleagues and forming good working relationships.
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'Working relationships'
Not 'Lets talk about crap I have no interest in' relationships.
I have asked the NHS constantly to be tested for ADHD / Autism, they say I can't have either because I have a degree and talk to them fine in my appointments.
On the other hand if I talk about my interests all day long, nobody wants to hear it. What makes people think I want to hear their crap then if they won't put up with mine?
It's a bit of give and take. Make a joke about it "haha you aren't going to bore me to death with cricket talk again are you mate
". Getting angry and complaining to managers is really just down to your inability to socially navigate your way through the situation. Maybe instead of thinking that because you don't bore him with your interests that he shouldn't bore you with his, you should look for some common interests and direct the conversation to those. Like the absolute worst case scenario for me would be just smiling and saying "Mate I've got quite a bit on today so I'm just gonna need to focus and crack on with it if that's cool".You do sound like you are on the spectrum somewhat
Honestly if I ran into someone like you at work I would just laugh it off and leave you to it. You don't have to socialise at work, you just have to be polite and do your work. I certainly wouldn't care enough to go to management. Unless there is more to this story.
I'm semi-sociable but fatigue quickly having to make small talk with people I don't know or have little in common with. It doesn't bother me beyond the fact I just get sick of it eventually and want to be anywhere else but there. I'm always amazed at some peoples capacity to talk about absolutely nothing.
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Everything's starting to fall into place.
It was fairly obvious from the start... sometimes, your first impression isn't wrong
Upon further investigation, it looks like it can only be classed as harassment if it's related to a protected characteristic. Otherwise it's bullying. So yeah you're kind of right, but that doesn't mean that bullying just goes unchecked.
To be clear I don't agree with the whole classification of harassment according to protected characteristics, but you can still get your employer in the **** even if it's not classified as such.
Yeah, definitely get tested. You sound like a nightmare to work with, communicating professionally and informally is important. Nothing worse than the 'do not disturb' types in low-level positions who pretend everyone else around them is the problem. Sometimes you have to do some self-reflection even if it's painful.
You may not even have one of those conditions you've mentioned but if you've been this way for a long time you may have learned how to mask it. Unless the GP or nurse specialises in autism I doubt they can say for sure whether you have it from just a brief chat. It's a lot more difficult for those who are high functioning and well into adulthood.
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It's a bit of give and take. Make a joke about it "haha you aren't going to bore me to death with cricket talk again are you mate
For the record I've actually never complained to managers. Other people have complained about me and been ignored.
I had zero issues working at Marks and Spencer, all other staff and myself got on perfectly, no one mispronouced my name, everyone was nice, no one wasted time chatting about small talk while working.
I just collapsed too many times and they couldn't keep me on because of that.