Seagull Keeps Attacking Me

adam_castell · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:19

as it flys down towards you sudenly swing round with a baseball bat??

Solaris · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:19

Wow I knew posting this here would be about as much use as looking for sensible advice about what to wear by posting on *chan...

In all seriousness I do think that it has a nest up on the roof nearby. I don't think it's down to anything I've specifically done to it in the past it's just being territorial...

I'll see if I can get some footage of it tonight on my iPhone, but was planning on walking a different route...

I have fully checked my head for sandwiches and that's a negative...

neil3k · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:20

stand and bang

ins0mn1ac · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:21

You have a hilarious problem and you come to GD for a mature answer? lolololol

shaank · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:22

does it attack other people? or just you?

i.e. that will help you determine if it's a nest, or if it's your hair product

adam_castell · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:25

it is a very strange, unusual, funny problem!!

Solaris · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:25

I have no hair product...

My hair is just in need of a cut...

I haven't observed the Seagull. I will have to stake out the road and see if it attacks anyone else...

ins0mn1ac · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:27

Maybe your head (hair uncut) simply looks like a nest? he just wants to go home!

NeverWinter · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:28

Falcon punch?

GinG · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:30

Maybe you look like a female seagull?
Do you wash with anything which contains sea salt? Possibly dive bombing as it thinks you are the sea.

Solaris · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:33

My hair does possibly look like a nest.

I do wear a navy blue polo shirt to work which I wash using Bold Ocean Fresh tablets? But surely a seagul isn't stupid enough to think I'm the ocean???

A falcon punch is what it's getting if it doesn't stop, however I am very against animal cruelty... But this bird has crossed the line...

A.N.Other · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:36

Gel your hair into long spikes. If necessary, get hair extensions to do so.

shaank · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:36

Solaris said:
I have no hair product...

My hair is just in need of a cut...

I haven't observed the Seagull. I will have to stake out the road and see if it attacks anyone else...

further observation, full report including video survellience for both our analysis, and for jokes

Solaris · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:37

Gel your hair into long spikes. If necessary, get hair extensions to do so.

But then I'll look like a douche?

A.N.Other · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:39

Solaris said:
But then I'll look like a douche?

Yes, but at least you'll be safe from gulls. You can't have everything in this life.

fez · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:43

This is the first thread in ages that has genuinely cracked me up. You are being bullied by a seagull so badly that you are going to walk a different route to avoid it!

Have you told your parents about this?

Glaucus · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:49

http://www.hamiltonadvertiser.co.uk...ople-in-quiet-hamilton-street-51525-26712722/

This might help, chick couldn't fly and had fallen out of the nest. Council sent pest control in to put the chick back into the nest and the attacks stopped.

Bennie-Mac · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:49

K1LLSW1TCH said:
Is it a one legged seagull? They're evil.

They've seen some things maaan. I wouldnt recommend it!

Kazz · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:49

As it swoops down behind you, turn around and shout "oi! ...seagull! .....naaaaaaaaaaaow!"

Solaris · 30 Jun 2011 at 16:49

fez said:
This is the first thread in ages that has genuinely cracked me up. You are being bullied by a seagull so badly that you are going to walk a different route to avoid it!

Have you told your parents about this?

No! I'm 23 years old and don't even live with my parents...

Maybe I should just get my car fixed so I don't have to walk from the bus stop to my office...

What's worse is the Seagull is between me and a load of fast food places as well! So sometimes I have to get past it 4 times a day! Either that or I go without lunch because I'm too scared...