Mine is hard to deal with, needs residential treatment that is expensive.
**The Mental Health Thread**
- Thread starter Gabbatek
- Start date
-
- Tags
- mental health
Mine is hard to deal with, needs residential treatment that is expensive.
Just to clarify re your estimated expenses, this is a mental health thread after all:
Is your trauma physical (ie. a physical injury) or psychological, or both?
If psychological, is your trauma simply psychological trauma without ptsd? Or post-traumatic stress disorder (with or without additional pre-existing (prior to a trauma-causing event) psychological conditions)?
Only if you have ptsd, ignoring any particular cause, which combination of these complexifying factors do you have? (which bear on an estimate of expense):
1.
a. you experienced a single trauma or,
b. multiple trauma events (of different sources)
2. Age of trauma occurrence:
a. Before the age of 10 y.o.:
b. After the age of 10 y.o. but prior to age 18, or
c. After the age of 18 years old
3.
a. Recently occurred (1 year or less ago), or
b. chronic (occurred more than 1 year ago).
4. How many persistent pre-existing and concurrent psychological impairment conditions exist at the time of post-traumatic stress disorder treatment?
Eg. If you have any of autism, ADHD, etc, add 1 point for each additional condition:
a. 0
b. 1
c. 2
d. 3
Etc.
Combination 1b + 2a + 3b + 4b -> n are typically the most complex and difficult to treat. Hence, the most expensive combination.
You need not post your answers publicly. The list is simply for your own private convenience as a potential aid to estimating relative cost.
Associate
- Joined
- 20 Mar 2014
- Posts
- 2,361
I will try some vitamin D then, do you think a multivitamin would work?
Caporegime
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-53820425
Not exactly surprising but just shows what a change in lifestyle and face-to-face socialising can do to people's mental health.
Not exactly surprising but just shows what a change in lifestyle and face-to-face socialising can do to people's mental health.
As you say not surprising.
Initially at lockdown I was a mess because of stressing about things. Then it calmed and I actually felt better, I couldn't help my mum with certain things as we weren't allowed to be in contact and, as awful as it sounds, it was great. My stress level definitely dropped quite a bit lol. It picked up again once the lockdown eased
I do miss hugs but I was craving them long before the virus came
(my family aren't really the hugging kind) I miss the little things like hanging out with my nieces and nephews and I think lately I have had a touch of cabin fever. Was better when I was going for walks but sadly several different men decided to go around hassling women/grabbing them etc and it was getting so bad I decided to avoid venturing out particularly because it was happening in public places. Every time I think 'maybe take a walk today' I then see another post on Facebook of a different bloke this time
I can't wait for the day where I'll be allowed to do kick boxing with my bro in law again, been really missing it lately 
As you say not surprising.
Initially at lockdown I was a mess because of stressing about things. Then it calmed and I actually felt better, I couldn't help my mum with certain things as we weren't allowed to be in contact and, as awful as it sounds, it was great. My stress level definitely dropped quite a bit lol. It picked up again once the lockdown eased
I do miss hugs but I was craving them long before the virus came
Every time I think 'maybe take a walk today' I then see another post on Facebook of a different bloke this time
I found it strange that lockdown I felt super comfortable. It help greatly when I went out.
Not sure what your situation is but helping out/caring for family in any capacity can be immensely stressful. Did that for a few years myself and it nearly drove me over the edge. It feels selfish and guilt-tripping when you start to build up a smidgeon of resentment and/or wanting a break from it but you can't help it. I'm determined to never put anyone in that situation myself now.As you say not surprising.
Initially at lockdown I was a mess because of stressing about things. Then it calmed and I actually felt better, I couldn't help my mum with certain things as we weren't allowed to be in contact and, as awful as it sounds, it was great. My stress level definitely dropped quite a bit lol. It picked up again once the lockdown eased
<snip>
Every time I think 'maybe take a walk today' I then see another post on Facebook of a different bloke this time
Can you not drive to somewhere a bit less dodgy for walks? National Trust places or something similar which are much more safe? I appreciate that may be trickier to fit around a normal schedule but you really shouldn't stay cooped up.
As for lockdown, I think it's taught me that I no longer like being around large crowds of people. Not going to busy pubs, supermarkets or other crammed venues suits me fine now. Aside from work, it's time to focus on doing things at a much slower, more relaxed pace
Everyone thinks about morbid stuff like this at least once in their lives (I have a plan if I ever become terminally ill), but if it's happening regularly I'd think about addressing the root cause. Alcohol is particularly bad at exacerbating these kind of thoughts so cut it down if you do drink?
Last edited:
I do not drink or smoke.Not sure what your situation is but helping out/caring for family in any capacity can be immensely stressful. Did that for a few years myself and it nearly drove me over the edge. It feels selfish and guilt-tripping when you start to build up a smidgeon of resentment and/or wanting a break from it but you can't help it. I'm determined to never put anyone in that situation myself now.
Can you not drive to somewhere a bit less dodgy for walks? National Trust places or something similar which are much more safe? I appreciate that may be trickier to fit around a normal schedule but you really shouldn't stay cooped up.
As for lockdown, I think it's taught me that I no longer like being around large crowds of people. Not going to busy pubs, supermarkets or other crammed venues suits me fine now. Aside from work, it's time to focus on doing things at a much slower, more relaxed pace
Everyone thinks about morbid stuff like this at least once in their lives (I have a plan if I ever become terminally ill), but if it's happening regularly I'd think about addressing the root cause. Alcohol is particularly bad at exacerbating these kind of thoughts so cut it down if you do drink?
When it first started happening the car parks for other areas were closed and the incidents were being reported at every park in my town. Now that I'm on part time work/furlough I do currently have 2 free days a week and I should get out more. I guess I have just been focusing on using those days to catch up on my own things really or just relax as the weekend has been used to help my mum with things (plus I was avoiding using my car too much to save on fuel)
part of it was also that I wanted to avoid large crowds of people.
My niece did invite me over the other week though and we took a walk around her local park which was nice
My mum is popping over today to help me with something and I was going to suggest a walk but it's decided to pour down with rain.
RE the family situation, it's various on going DIY stuff etc that I'm helping my mum with and it seems I'm the only child willing to help. During lockdown my mum could have carried on with a few bits but she didn't. It feels like she will only do things If I'm there as well. A few weeks ago we were doing her garden, I was doing the bulk and she was raking up the garden waste. She wanted to pack in early but I told her no, let's do another hour. I actually said "come on mum, suck it up, 1 more hour and then we can finish"
I have asked for help multiple times from family but get nowhere :/
Yep, been in that exact same situation with nobody else being prepared to help, even though it would have been easy for them. It's exhausting! What's that saying, you can choose your friends but you can't choose your family? In my experience, the annoying thing is that those same people quickly crawl out of the woodwork when they want something.RE the family situation, it's various on going DIY stuff etc that I'm helping my mum with and it seems I'm the only child willing to help. During lockdown my mum could have carried on with a few bits but she didn't. It feels like she will only do things If I'm there as well. A few weeks ago we were doing her garden, I was doing the bulk and she was raking up the garden waste. She wanted to pack in early but I told her no, let's do another hour. I actually said "come on mum, suck it up, 1 more hour and then we can finish"
I have asked for help multiple times from family but get nowhere :/
Nice one giving your mum a nudge - sometimes people get a bit too comfortable letting others bend over backwards for them and it's best nipped in the bud. Once they are in that frame of mind, an entitled, cantankerous phase can follow afterwards. Take it from me, I got involved helping out an elderly family friend several years back and that really isn't fun to deal with when you're getting moaned at constantly for it.
Good luck with it all - as long as you get downtime that's the important thing. My current zen thing is my garden and getting as much biodiversity as possible. Chills me out now looking after the plants and watching the birds and insects.
Last edited:
Soldato
Take it from me, I got involved helping out a family friend several years back and that really isn't fun to deal with when you're getting moaned at constantly for it.
This has been happening to me quite a lot with my brother. He is going through a very long divorce so he's got his own crap going on but he puts a lot of pressure on me a lot of the time with it. He has a very large house to himself now which I have helped him with for many years (lots of weekends given up). Of late, he is doing his bathroom and my dad is over helping a lot too. I keep getting asked to go over and do things which I do but only for my dad really (My parents live 1 hour away from my brother, I now live 30 mins away).
Each time I leave with a negative experience, usually because I have been shouted at by my brother as the process is stressing him out. I mean like I am quietly plumbing for him and he has a go at me about it. I have a good mind to tell him to F off but I keep my cool. My parents pander to him too much so I think he thinks its acceptable to behave like he is. I should also point out my brother is 2 years older than me.
He has never helped me with my old house or my new house. I do everything on my own. Currently got a big job of decorating going on before I can get new carpets in so I am keen to concentrate on my own stuff!
I have quite literally got to the point where I dread going over to his and I don't want to speak to him at all. I am only keeping good relations really as I would miss seeing my two young nephews when he has them.
Associate
As you say not surprising.
Initially at lockdown I was a mess because of stressing about things. Then it calmed and I actually felt better, I couldn't help my mum with certain things as we weren't allowed to be in contact and, as awful as it sounds, it was great. My stress level definitely dropped quite a bit lol. It picked up again once the lockdown eased
I do miss hugs but I was craving them long before the virus came
Every time I think 'maybe take a walk today' I then see another post on Facebook of a different bloke this time
Sounds like moving to a different area would be a good move.
I was going to say that too but it's easier said than done for many where your entire family and friends network is nearby. It can be financially difficult too, to say the least.
I have no real ties but I'm still struggling to make the leap for a handful of reasons. Saying that, a mate of mine just upped sticks and moved to the other end of the country in the space of a few weeks. It can be done if you have the will and have your ducks in a row.
Sadly I'm not in a financial position to move again right now. I only moved here 2 years in Sept and took a 5 year fixed rate mortgage. I'm still actually trying to make my flat into a home because I spent so much time before lockdown helping my mum out 
I always compared the crime rating with where I was (I.e. my mum's place) vs wherever I was looking and this area was pretty much the same. Shoplifting was higher but that's expected when I live by a shopping centre. There are creeps everywhere and this sort of thing probably happens in my old town too, it's just that I'm only seeing reports for where I live now.
I always compared the crime rating with where I was (I.e. my mum's place) vs wherever I was looking and this area was pretty much the same. Shoplifting was higher but that's expected when I live by a shopping centre. There are creeps everywhere and this sort of thing probably happens in my old town too, it's just that I'm only seeing reports for where I live now.
Soldato
Maybe true. I've been avoiding going over and helping for a while now though and I do tell him I don't appreciate being shouted at when it happens. I've got to go over on Friday after I finish work to run sealant for him as he can't possible do it himself. If I don't do it, my dad has to come and do it.
Where I used to live, my wife used to go on her bike without me on occasion and would get men shouting stuff at her so she stopped as she felt uncomfortable. Similar stuff has happened where we live now (a very nice area). You do get creeps / scumbags wherever you live.