Thinking about breaking up with Gf.

You shouldn't feel like you have to buy her love mate.

Unless there is some underlying problems, the money that you (don't) have shouldn't be a reason for you to break up with her.

You need to sit and talk to her, explain your feelings and say that you're really worried that you can't treat her to the finer things in life or take her out for meals etc...

She should be fine with it.

A romantic gesture doesn't have to cost the earth though, why take her out for a meal? Go down to your local supermarket and pick up some ingredients... cook for her and have a nice candle lit dinner together.

Surprise her with a small bunch of flowers every so often, buy some candles and some nice incense and have a nice romantic bath together.

Believe it or not, it's the cheap romantic gestures like that which you have to actually put a little effort into that most girls appreciate more than you shelling out for a meal out somewhere.
 
If you do something for her that shows you have made an effort that will be worth far more than spending cash on her.

I am in the very fortunate position of being able to do most things for my wife. Financially we are well off. But jewellery, flowers, meals out, trips to the spa etc count for nothing compared to the smaller things.

Most recently I spent a load of time sorting out our bedroom, making it look lovely with candles, fresh flower petals, massage oils etc - and spent some real time with her. Cost me about £10 but was appreciated far more than anything else I have bought her.

Try taking your girlfriend for a walk and have a secluded picnic somewhere. Bit harder in the current weather but you could easily sort something out for less than a tenner.
 
It's her decision if she deserves better, not yours. Don't make the underlying issues her fault. If she's unhappy with you being broke, she'll approach you about it.

Don't throw something good away because you're scared about the maintenence. Everyone goes through hard times, and you'll be through it soon enough. Especially if you work at it together.

If you think the money situation is making you depressed, and it's effecting your relationship with her, then tell her. Honesty is, afterall, the best policy (unless you've slept with her sister. dont tell her that).
 
From what I have learned, at times like this its the time actually spent with her, that was set aside only for her and with 100% of your attention on her, that women appreciate rather than the size of the bill at the end.
 
You're either just feeling sorry for yourself, or you're looking for an excuse to end the relationship. Which is it?

When I first met my wife I was unemployed, had pretty much no money and the little money I did have was vanishing playing poker.

If she loves you then the money is not an issue. What could be an issue is that you're not displaying your affection because you think you need money to do that. You don't. Cook her beans on toast, stick on her favorite music and talk to her!
 
G-MAN2004 said:
I think you should sit down and talk to her, instead of asking for our views. You never know, she may be fine with it and will support you throughout.
Click to expand...

This.

Talk to her about it, tell her how you feel. It is the mature thing to do, and saves her wondering what happened if she is perfectly happy, you may find she doesn't mind, or has solutions - it is ALWAYS best to talk about thing.
 
Why do you have to take her out and buy her presents? I have never done anything for an "anniversary" with my boyfriend of 3 years, as I hate the idea of presents for the sake of presents. If you don't have much money, you definately shouldn't waste it on things that you don't need and if she loves you, she'll understand that.

If you really want to do something to celebrate, take the advice you've been given and cook her something at home. A night in with good food, music and wine can be much more romantic than out in a restaurant which could cost twice as much.

EDIT: My ex cooked for me when we had been together for a year, and he still lived with his parents. All he had to do was ask them to stay out of the way for an evening, not exactly rocket science.
 
area51_for_psx said:
Live with my parents so cooking her a romantic meal doesnt really work with my parents walking about the house. And the bath together no chance.

no underlying issues we get on great.
Click to expand...

You're useless. Take her out for a picnic then! Could be anywhere - the park, a bus shelter.....in your car even. Actually, the more silly the better. Stop making excuses.
 
area51_for_psx said:
Live with my parents so cooking her a romantic meal doesnt really work with my parents walking about the house. And the bath together no chance.

no underlying issues we get on great.
Click to expand...

Vixen said:
EDIT: My ex cooked for me when we had been together for a year, and he still lived with his parents. All he had to do was ask them to stay out of the way for an evening, not exactly rocket science.
Click to expand...

This. :)

Talk to your folks, say that your anniversary is coming up with your girlfriend and you'd really like to make an effort for her and that you'd really apprieate it if they made themselves scares for the evening and gave you guys some time alone.

I don't see why the bath together is out of the question either, my girlfriend and I used to do that all the time when I lived with my mum. But that's fair enough.

How old is your other half, and if it's easier for you both... maybe it'll be easier for you to do this at her (or her parents) place if your folks aren't comfortable with it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom