Urinating Standing Up

TwsT · 16 Apr 2014 at 14:58

I am a big guy and have a big bladder with a decent flow if i pee sat down it will flow over the toilet and onto the floor in most toilets.

I also Like check mating people on urinals I have no shame. I own't go in a cubical because someone is on urinal 1 and someone else on 3 oh no move over boys I'm peeing in number 2.

Bubo · 16 Apr 2014 at 15:00

I do it standing up. It's actually quite difficult to pee into an empty coke bottle whilst sitting down.

randomshenans · 16 Apr 2014 at 15:03

Do any of you flop of the meat and it's 2 accompanying veg while at the urinal, or just Sgt Pepper himself? Something I just feel more comfortable junk out.

No? Just me? Thought so.

ChocolateStarfishRammer · 16 Apr 2014 at 15:16

I dont believe I have ever gone into a cubicle with the intentions of having a sit down wee wee. If I'm perching my cheeky on what hundreds of other men have also, I'm gunna mark my territory and mess the place up with fecal matter.

anything I don't mind said:
Is it even possible to wipe standing up? as when you stand up the dark matter will smear between the but cheeks and make more of a mess.

Who doesn't wipe standing up!? Why would you want to stretch your arm through your legs down into the toilet to wipe your arse?

Stand up, part left arse cheek with left hand, wipe bum hole with tissue on right hand.

ChocolateStarfishRammer · 16 Apr 2014 at 15:19

TwsT said:
I am a big guy and have a big bladder with a decent flow if i pee sat down it will flow over the toilet and onto the floor in most toilets.

randomshenans · 16 Apr 2014 at 15:29

ChocolateStarfishRammer said:
I dont believe I have ever gone into a cubicle with the intentions of having a sit down wee wee. If I'm perching my cheeky on what hundreds of other men have also, I'm gunna mark my territory and mess the place up with fecal matter.

Who doesn't wipe standing up!? Why would you want to stretch your arm through your legs down into the toilet to wipe your arse?

Stand up, part left arse cheek with left hand, wipe bum hole with tissue on right hand.

Bending just causes natural parting... no need for manual left hand intervention. Lean to one side (auto parting commences) reach AROUND (not through) wipe.

Some people...

Storm3y · 17 Apr 2014 at 01:01

Just had the most embarrassing night of my life. Apparently the little fella down there is a bit on the charcoal side. Bloody sunbeds for you.

Gogl · 17 Apr 2014 at 01:08

Storm3y said:
Just had the most embarrassing night of my life. Apparently the little fella down there is a bit on the charcoal side. Bloody sunbeds for you.

I hope you seized the chance to claim the gift of diverse genes which have manifested through your manhood. Though whether you could rise to those sorts of expectations is a different matter.

bloodiedathame · 17 Apr 2014 at 01:19

Urinal splashback is bad, urinal splashback from someone else is worse.

Storm3y · 17 Apr 2014 at 01:32

Gogl said:
I hope you seized the chance to claim the gift of diverse genes which have manifested through your manhood. Though whether you could rise to those sorts of expectations is a different matter.

I don't like to brag. But it is a bit on the dark side, even my lovely legs!

Gogl · 17 Apr 2014 at 01:35

Storm3y said:
I don't like to brag. But it is a bit on the dark side, even my lovely legs!

Storm3y said:
Bloody sunbeds for you.

If I whacked mine in the toaster for a bit I'm sure it would also end up looking, well, a bit toasty.

TwsT · 17 Apr 2014 at 08:55

ChocolateStarfishRammer said:
austin powers

not that big lol but I can't pee sitting down it doesn't work for me except that one time when i was........

Belly · 25 Apr 2014 at 11:46

I was taught in the Army to: "Always keep your weapon pointed down the range"

I'm led to believe that the women of the Turkana tribe in Northern Kenya urinate standing up and the men crouch down.

hamesy · 25 Apr 2014 at 13:09

bloodiedathame said:
Urinal splashback is bad, urinal splashback from someone else is worse.

This reminds me of the time I ****ed on the MD at my old place.

Was Friday afternoon just before finishing so my mind was on other things, went to the toilet and the MD walked in and started to use the urinal next to me. As I finished, I looked down to see I totally missed and half my **** was on his shoes :eek:

mlbtheshow · 25 Apr 2014 at 15:20

randomshenans said:
Do any of you flop of the meat and it's 2 accompanying veg while at the urinal, or just Sgt Pepper himself? Something I just feel more comfortable junk out.

No? Just me? Thought so.

I go full half naked, trousers and pants down to ankles.

So im arse out, makes farting more satisfying as well.

randomshenans · 25 Apr 2014 at 15:23

At urinals? I bet people LOVE standing near you

TheBDog · 25 Apr 2014 at 15:24

hamesy said:
Was Friday afternoon just before finishing so my mind was on other things, went to the toilet and the MD walked in and started to use the urinal next to me. As I finished, I looked down to see I totally missed and half my **** was on his shoes

Is that why it's now your old place?

mlbtheshow said:
I go full half naked, trousers and pants down to ankles.

So im arse out, makes farting more satisfying as well.

That's dedication. I go with purely the meat(not the 2 veg) because I am a massive prude and overly self conscious. If anyone goes next to me stage fright becomes a serious issue

Manbatius · 25 Apr 2014 at 17:51

randomshenans said:
It's all amount the lunge position with forearm lean against wall point downwards technique.

So this ^ post sex.

Funny this thread appeared, last week I was going to create one asking if anyone brushed their teeth while peeing standing up.

I started doing this a while ago in the mornings to save time, then realised how disgusting it was, then continued anyway.

Antony101 · 25 Apr 2014 at 18:21

I wee sitting down at work all the time, mainly because just standing there for 10 minutes after I've finished seems really odd.

Gogl · 25 Apr 2014 at 18:29

Manbatius said:
So this ^ post sex.

Funny this thread appeared, last week I was going to create one asking if anyone brushed their teeth while peeing standing up.

I started doing this a while ago in the mornings to save time, then realised how disgusting it was, then continued anyway.

I can't recall having done so but I wander all over while brushing my teeth so wouldn't be surprised at all if taking a pee was part of that, I'm sure it must have been at some point. Grim perhaps, but probably will be again.