what age

j0s · 27 Jan 2012 at 12:54

What age would you think about not having kids?

I will be hitting the dizzy heights of being 39 this year, with no children. The missus is younger and me would like to have kids, but we need to be in a more stable financial position.

The thing is I'm at the point of feeling to old to have children, also by the time we are financial stable I think it will be even more to late.

So just putting it out there what age would you consider to stop having kids.

loltim · 27 Jan 2012 at 12:56

I'd quite like a mini me and i'm 28. Will have to wait though, need a house and a bit more security first.

Robbo · 27 Jan 2012 at 12:56

Surely the age of your wife is pretty key, 'younger' doesn't really say a lot.

You should start thinking about it soon though, definitely.

loltim · 27 Jan 2012 at 12:57

yeah 40 is getting on a bit, your child will get some right abuse if you're 55 when he's 15

vanandjuanunited · 27 Jan 2012 at 12:58

Besides which if you keep wanting to be more financially secure you will keep delaying until its "too" late.

Only you can decide unless you ae going to tell us your life story.

j0s · 27 Jan 2012 at 12:59

Robbo said:
Surely the age of your wife is pretty key, 'younger' doesn't really say a lot.

You should start thinking about it soon though, definitely.

She is 10 years younger than me.

loltim said:
yeah 40 is getting on a bit, your child will get some right abuse if you're 55 when he's 15

That is my biggest concern

TriedandTested · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:01

j0s said:
She is 10 years younger than me.

That is my biggest concern

That's your biggest concern about having children? Really? :confused:

Skidder · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:04

Doesn't really matter how old the dad is. Kids get abused because they are weak and easy targets not because their parents are old.

How bad is your financial situation? I have 2 kids and I wouldn't say life is wildly more expensive than it was before they came along. More spent on baby junk less spent on going out/leisure.

Redman · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:04

loltim said:
yeah 40 is getting on a bit, your child will get some right abuse if you're 55 when he's 15

Why? Better to have an older, more life experienced father than someone who's barely worked themselves out before they've had children.

Begbie · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:04

WeOwnTheSky said:
That's your biggest concern about having children? Really?

I think he means not being able to look after them good enough due to being old.

55 ain't that old anymore, when I'm 55 I want to be as fit as I am now.

Bar · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:05

In all honesty if you wait until you are financially secure enough to have a child, chances are you never will.

Children will cost money but almost always people find away to make ends meet. I think its far better to have the energy to play with your kids and do things with them, than to have loads of money to spend on them.

loltim · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:06

WeOwnTheSky said:
That's your biggest concern about having children? Really?

I was semi joking so i'm surprised it's a major concern too

Better than having a dad with only 16-17 years apart!

Narj · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:07

Much to the annoyance of my mum and other female family members, I decided that I prefer financial stability and a quiet life so concluded at 29 that I *definitely* didn't want any, which contributed towards the end of the long term relationship I was in. Oh well!

Having spent so much time around my brother & sisters' kids I don't know how I'd ever handle the tantrums, bawling, screaming and poo-filled nappies. The sound of a baby crying starts my blood boiling. I love spending time with my niece though (11), she's awesome - if only they just popped out and were instantly at that stage where you can talk to them and do fun stuff together.

Kamwah · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:08

Being only 20 I don't have plans to have kids anytime soon and that's if I decide to (atm I'd rather not). I couldn't really pinpoint an age to say I wouldn't have kids no matter what the situation as I'd probably say it relies more on the wife/GF's age as that can be a big factor in how the pregnancy goes.)

My mom had my half-brother when she was 40 (3-4 years ago) and I thought that was incredibly stupid seeing as they hardly spend anytime with the him apart from the weekends.

whitecrook · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:08

j0s said:
but we need to be in a more stable financial position.

If everybody did this - no one would have any kids.

FNGsam · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:09

My dad is 70 this year (giggidy) I'm fairly sure, maybe only 69 but I'm 25 this year so he was 45ish when he had me and we get along fine.

I never even thought it was an issue and certainly didn't matter to anyone else I found.

Cosimo · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:09

Don’t put it off for too long or you’ll be spending your golden years looking after the kids.

d_brennen · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:10

Financially there is no absolute right time. You will adjust and will have to make it work. The only people who can really afford children are the very rich or the very poor

wordy · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:11

I'm 34 and have never wanted them. The g/f is 30 and while she's always said she never wanted any, she's thinking soon it might be too late so seems to be questioning herself, as she thinks by the time she's in her mid 30's she'll be too old.

shootersam · 27 Jan 2012 at 13:11

My dad was just under 40 when I was born. I do have 2 older brothers though.