Would you tell them?

ah, sorry to hear that Gilly - thats really sad news :(

I personally would tell them... the reason being is that he is the father of one of your parents and therefore important to them (if they were close). another thing is that they knew he was ill so it will be in the back of their minds and wont be a total shock to the system....

your parents can have countless more holidays but only one moment to say 'goodbye' properly. also, if you told them after they got back then any relaxation they would have had whilst on holiday will instantly be forgotten with this sad news :(

if youre a close family i dont think they will hate/hold a grudge towards you for it for disrupting their holiday plans. youre a sensible guy so i doubt they would see it as being selfish either. at the end of the day the decision is yours and i dont envy you mate.
 
Hi Matt,

Sorry to hear about your familys loss.


I think it would be best to call them.. It's going to be tough for you but who better to break the news. At least by being away they will have a few days to get over the shock and have some time to think. It probably won't hit them until they get home.


I know it's different but my best mate was killed whilst I was on holiday with a girlfriend. My mum and dad just didn't know what was best. They told me when I just happened to call home. I was naturally upset but it didn't really hit me until I got home. I’m glad they did tell me because I had some time to reflect before having to deal with it when I got home.

I wish you and your family well.
 
man i'm sorry to hear that Gilly. that's a tough desicision to make. i dont think i can offer any advice, i really dont know what id do in that situation. Telling them means it will probably ruin their holiday, plus they'd have to arrange a flight back. short noice form Cuba im sure isnt cheap.It's a lot of stress to put them through. Tell them or wait? christ i dont know mate :(
 
Gilly said:
Scenario:

Your grandfather has been ill a long time, your grandmother died about 1.5 years ago. Your grandfather is in hospital on the stroke ward having had multiple strokes and a heart attack some weeks back.

Your parents go away on the 3rd of July.

Your grandfather dies on the 3rd of July.

I think I already know the answer. I just need to get it clear in my head.

I wish he'd been well enough to see my brother get married. I believe he may even be the last of his regiment (brigade? whatever) of Desert Rats.

RIP Grandad.
Click to expand...

Sorry to hear about this m8 :(

Almost the same thing happened to me about a month ago, grandmother went into hospital on a Wednesday, and was told it was not serious, so my parents went on their holiday Thursday morning.(which has been booked for a year).

When visiting on Friday evening for an hour before going out for a meal with the g/f I was told that she had two lots of cancer. But was told that it was not an immediate threat to her health. So I thought about not telling my parents so as not to ruin their holiday, and let them find out when they got back.

I decided to tell them anyway and as you can imagine they were on the next flight home which was the Sunday afternoon. My Grandmother passed away on the Thursday of that week, We got the phone call at 06:30.

They were so glad I told them, I would imagine they would know that you were trying to do the right thing by not telling them, but they will be a lot happier if you let them know as soon as possible
 
Firstly, deepest condolonces for you and your familys loss.

As has been said - holidays can be taken again. This event thankfully only happens once.

Many things can be taken back - lost time cannot.
 
So sorry for you Gilly :(

There's no right or wrong answer here. When you speak to them you'll know what to do, and whatever decision you make will be the right one.

Once you've done it, it's done - don't dwell on whether you should have done it differently. You're dealing with something really horrible, and you have my thoughts with you while you're doing it.
 
i personally know that my parents would rather i told them straight away then wait will they got back. Its just too important. You can go on holiday any time but this is different.

R.I.P Gilly's Grandad
 
Sorry to hear of your loss Gilly. I lost my Gran yesterday too :(

I'd say that as it's a grandparent on your fathers side that the best course of action is to let your mum know so that she can break the news to him in person.
 
kaiowas said:
Sorry to hear of your loss Gilly. I lost my Gran yesterday too :(

I'd say that as it's a grandparent on your fathers side that the best course of action is to let your mum know so that she can break the news to him in person.
Click to expand...
Precisely.

Sorry to here about both of your grandparents' :(
 
i think its probebly best you tell them as you dont know how they would react if you didnt! put your self in their shoes , would you want to be told?

RIP :(
 
Gilly said:
Scenario:

Your grandfather has been ill a long time, your grandmother died about 1.5 years ago. Your grandfather is in hospital on the stroke ward having had multiple strokes and a heart attack some weeks back.

Your parents go away on the 3rd of July.

Your grandfather dies on the 3rd of July.

I think I already know the answer. I just need to get it clear in my head.

I wish he'd been well enough to see my brother get married. I believe he may even be the last of his regiment (brigade? whatever) of Desert Rats.

RIP Grandad.
Click to expand...

I lost my last grandparent a year or so ago (my grandad).
He too was a Desert Rat - he had some great stories and things to tell.
Apparently there was a particular type of lizard they use to place on the dashboard of vehicles as they ate all of the flies buzzing around the driver!
There were also plenty of things he didn't want to talk about...

Back on subject - you've gotta make the call I'm afraid.
I had to break it to my mother over the phone while she was on holiday that her brother had died.
One of the most difficult things I've ever had to do in my life.
I nearly asked to be handed over to my dad so I could tell him but just decided to do it.
 
Sorry to hear that dude.

My sister was on holiday when my mother died. It took her 3 days to get a flight home. I would recommend telling them ASAP so they can arrange to make there way back.
 
Condolences Gilly :( may your grandad rest in peace.

My grandad is my absolute hero, a great man and an incredible man! I know how sad I'd be if he died and I'm sure you're feeling the same.

I guess you've probably made up you mind about what to do and have done it... but if I were you I'd get in contact with your folks as soon as possible. Best for them to know.

Chin up Dude and be happy in the memories you have of him, they will last forever.
 
I'm sorry for your loss Mat :(

To answer your question though, only you and your family know what would be best I'm afraid. If it were me I would weigh up how long they were away for and when the funeral would be set for. If they'd be back in time I wouldn't tell them - I'd let them enjoy their holidays and grieve when they get back. If they wouldn't be back in time, I'd tell them at the first opportunity so they could decide and make any travel arrangements that may be required.

My thoughts are with you x
 
yeah tough one.


how long are they gone for? which side of the family were they on?

how close were they to your mum or dad?

its probably best to tell them to be honest. let them decide to stay or come back.


sorry for you and your family mate. its never easy to deal with. time heals. remember him when he was well.

g/l
 
Sorry for your loss. I know I found it tough when I lost my Grandad.

My view might be late, but I'll share it anyway.

I'd definitely want to know, immediately. I don't care about the holiday. I'd stop my honeymoon short if one of my parents died, even in this case of an unfortunate drawn out situation. I'd want to be home, not only to pay my respects but also to organise. If you haven't already, tell them.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom