Uh-oh a girl thread...

This thread has me confused, Pretty sure the first girl has gone passed the cut off for friend zone now, Op has over thought it all and not done a thing about it.

Women like confidence and like to know where they stand.

Nail the 18yr old.

Oh and next time... please for the good of man kind! grow a pair and just let your intentions be know very early on. It helps :)
 
Somnambulist said:
You're probably in the dreaded Friend Zone by now.

When you spend a lot of time with a girl and never do anything more than act friendly you're basically condemning yourself to be seen by her as just that, a friend. Women tend to live through their emotions a lot more than men, and if you're not creating any kind of attraction or arousal in them then you're going to be looked at in a completely platonic way. There is simply no way you can logically convince a girl to be feel attraction for you, regardless of how you feel. Risking chasing her away by telling her is infinitely preferable than doing nothing and beating yourself up about it, and it's not fair on her if she just sees you as a mate and you harbour feelings that will probably bubble up in some sort of embarrassing outburst down the line. If she doesn't see you that way then what are you ruining by telling her? Your fairytale future together? That kind of speculation and expectation isn't conductive to happiness.

It's allllways better to communicate your interest early on so you're not wasting each others time and she knows you find her attractive and you avoid the classic 'friend who wants more' scenario, which is depressingly common. The window of opportunity exists, and it's never open for long.

Anyway, rather than delivering some sort of 'I really like you!' speech, take her out again, be flirty, initiate light physical contact, see how she reacts, and if it's going well tell her you want to play Dr. and Patient, it's time for her medicine so she should close her eyes, then kiss her.

Also never utter the 'deserves better' thing, self-belief goes a LONG way.
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Listen to this!

By the sounds of things I think your window of opportunity has been and gone my friend.
 
Somnambulist said:
You're probably in the dreaded Friend Zone by now.

When you spend a lot of time with a girl and never do anything more than act friendly you're basically condemning yourself to be seen by her as just that, a friend. Women tend to live through their emotions a lot more than men, and if you're not creating any kind of attraction or arousal in them then you're going to be looked at in a completely platonic way. There is simply no way you can logically convince a girl to be feel attraction for you, regardless of how you feel. Risking chasing her away by telling her is infinitely preferable than doing nothing and beating yourself up about it, and it's not fair on her if she just sees you as a mate and you harbour feelings that will probably bubble up in some sort of embarrassing outburst down the line. If she doesn't see you that way then what are you ruining by telling her? Your fairytale future together? That kind of speculation and expectation isn't conductive to happiness.

It's allllways better to communicate your interest early on so you're not wasting each others time and she knows you find her attractive and you avoid the classic 'friend who wants more' scenario, which is depressingly common. The window of opportunity exists, and it's never open for long.

Anyway, rather than delivering some sort of 'I really like you!' speech, take her out again, be flirty, initiate light physical contact, see how she reacts, and if it's going well tell her you want to play Dr. and Patient, it's time for her medicine so she should close her eyes, then kiss her.

Also never utter the 'deserves better' thing, self-belief goes a LONG way.
Click to expand...

thread end.
particularly the physical contact thing. 'i like you' is nice, but a bit school boy.

self-belief goes a long way for sure. Why do you think so many girls are with arrogant ********?

Jack Donaghy -
"YOU'RE A LION, TAKE WHATS YOURS."
 
KatanaDV20 said:
This needs to be pinned and everyone with girl issues (me included) need to refer to it!

Nicely said dude. Im kinda in the same boat as OP and what you said has got me thinkin..
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Theres plenty of similar reading material that he is quoting from, its all from the seduction community online, plenty of videos and books to read, search Neil Strauss, Mystery, Juggler, Real Social Dynamics, Style, Mystery Method and similar.

Theres pick up specific forums.

Drossla said:
But I meet up with the girl I like perhaps every 4-6 weeks? I have to get her alone to tell her how I feel (out of the public) This other girl...she's good looking and fun but I'm not sure if we'd have a lot in common :\

I could RING the girl I like but that's some poor effort.
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Well, now you have a fall back, you have nothing to lose by ringing her up and asking her out on a proper date, for all you know she has been waiting the last year for you to push the button.

Sometimes the best friendships make the best relationships!
 
Drossla said:
Still not spoken with the first girl which is kinda good because it makes things a bit more awkward and less friendly. You guys say the first girl only wants to be friends now but I don't thing you all realise how infrequently I actually see her. She got in touch regarding something else today but it looks like I'm just going to have to ask her out over the phone :\ She deserves better though.
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The original girl? If you like her, just ask to go out for a drink or anything, you'll know if she feels something, then at some point, just tell her you like her.

Same kind of thing happened to me with my current girlfriend, we both liked eachother, but would not say anything. Eventually we ended up with each other...But seriously, meet up, talk, then say what you like with regards to liking her.

If you like someone that much, ive learned its better to tell than not to tell, itll just hurt otherwise
 
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