Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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You hit the Nail well and truly sir.

I've had one person who actually replies with a decent come back, I think I'm just going to not send messages to those who can't be bothered to think of something responsive.

Personally speaking I find it is me doing all the leg work whilst the females just seem to sit there basking in the attention they are receiving. I think males seriously out-number females and I think a lot of girls on there have no intention other than to make themselves feel attractive/wanted.
 
It's probably not really their fault though, if the situation was reversed I bet most men would act the same.

Dating is just a lot harder for men than it is for women, a lot of women expect the man to make all the moves, to initiate the contact, to put themselves on the line and face rejection over and over, it's the same both online and offline, just online it's much easier to just ignore someone.
 
Again with the woman bashing :/ you wait till I get on there then it will be me moaning about the one liners from men :p When Mac and I first got chatting our emails were really long and then we moved onto MSN and texting but even then we were chatting a lot.

We don't all act like we are princesses and there are plenty of blokes in the past who are clearly up themselves and were wasting my time. I.e. they were the complete opposite. I'd get loads of winks on match but no one would message or reply. I don't expect a guy to come and find me but I'm also not going to spend hours each evening searching and messaging. I'll just be going on for short spaces of time because I know from before how distracting it can be just browsing around and I already have loads of things to catch up on lol
 
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It's probably not really their fault though, if the situation was reversed I bet most men would act the same.

Dating is just a lot harder for men than it is for women, a lot of women expect the man to make all the moves, to initiate the contact, to put themselves on the line and face rejection over and over, it's the same both online and offline, just online it's much easier to just ignore someone.

Why should it be this way though? We're constantly being told that men and women are equal, times change, etc. etc.

Why then, should it be the men that have to go crawling to average looking women who then sit there cherry picking their way through the 9678 messages they have received that hour and deciding who is worthy of an email from a 'princess'?
 
Again with the woman bashing :/ you wait till I get on there then it will be me moaning about the one liners from men :p When Mac and I first got chatting our emails were really long and then we moved onto MSN and texting but even then we were chatting a lot.


Women or Men i HATE one liners!!, if i put the effort in so should they
 
Ive had several one liners and text speak messages this evening. All men I'd like to point out. :)
 
Again with the woman bashing :/ you wait till I get on there then it will be me moaning about the one liners from men :p When Mac and I first got chatting our emails were really long and then we moved onto MSN and texting but even then we were chatting a lot.

We don't all act like we are princesses and there are plenty of blokes in the past who are clearly up themselves and were wasting my time. I.e. they were the complete opposite. I'd get loads of winks on match but no one would message or reply. I don't expect a guy to come and find me but I'm also not going to spend hours each evening searching and messaging. I'll just be going on for short spaces of time because I know from before how distracting it can be just browsing around and I already have loads of things to catch up on lol

The thing is though, after you've spoken to quite a few people who do one liners to every message you send it can get a bit tedious.

I don't think it's a lot of the userbase that do it, it's either they don't really want to be chatting or they're shy. I've spent a lot of effort reading their profile, some of which are quite long and asking them questions and all you get back is a maximum of 8-10 words each reply.

I'm just really confused, if they don't like the look of me then why reply, I'd love to do it back but that would get me nowhere.
 
I'm just really confused, if they don't like the look of me then why reply, I'd love to do it back but that would get me nowhere.

Exactly. I'd rather nothing than have to engage in the utter dull-fest that tends to be the typical female reply on POF of

"hi im good thx how r u?"
 
Why should it be this way though? We're constantly being told that men and women are equal, times change, etc. etc.

Why then, should it be the men that have to go crawling to average looking women who then sit there cherry picking their way through the 9678 messages they have received that hour and deciding who is worthy of an email from a 'princess'?

It's not that it should be this way, it's just the way it is :/ even as you say average looking women get so much attention from men on a night out or online that they can afford to be picky, because they have tons of other men messaging them also. Though I doubt it's just women, I bet the good looking guys get a fair amount of attention too and are just as picky.

I bet if you made two identical profiles but one had a picture of an average looking guy and the other of a really good looking guy the profile with the good looking guy would get a ton of messages.
 
We don't all act like we are princesses and there are plenty of blokes in the past who are clearly up themselves and were wasting my time. I.e. they were the complete opposite. I'd get loads of winks on match but no one would message or reply. I don't expect a guy to come and find me but I'm also not going to spend hours each evening searching and messaging. I'll just be going on for short spaces of time because I know from before how distracting it can be just browsing around and I already have loads of things to catch up on lol

Ive had several one liners and text speak messages this evening. All men I'd like to point out. :)

It is somewhat ironic that you comment on the lousy chat up lines from men.

The other thing with guys bashing women here is that it is predominantly a male forum. I'll defend women if I think its warrented (ie: last night). But in this case I would have to ask you both, how often, or do you even bother to message guys at all on these dating sites? It looks like you sit around (generalising to a certain extent) and await the right guy to send the right lines to you.

Then its the "I'm not looking for anyone to mess me around" routine and thats because you've let the one guy that message/chats YOU up, usually some kind of alpha male that made you laugh take you for a ride.

I see guys here say they message 20+ women, I don't see women ever say that they have sent 20+ messages to guys. Until you do, you can't really complain about the crap you get from others.
 
It's not that it should be this way, it's just the way it is :/
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You are right, and I agree with your entire post.

I see guys here say they message 20+ women, I don't see women ever say that they have sent 20+ messages to guys. Until you do, you can't really complain about the crap you get from others.

Nail.Hit.Head.

I wonder how many messages your average POF female has sent? Or whether they simply sit back and await the flood of adoring candidates?
 
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Nail.Hit.Head.

I wonder how many messages your average POF female has sent? Or whether they simple sit back and await the flood of adoring candidates?
I've been signed up on POF since Feb 2010 and have only sent one first message :o I think I will start searching and sending first messages though, maybe the guys who wait for women to send messages first are actually decent guys...
 
I've been signed up on POF since Feb 2010 and have only sent one first message :o I think I will start searching and sending first messages though, maybe the guys who wait for women to send messages first are actually decent guys...

Why though? Do you think the right guy is just going to land on your doorstep? Us guys obviously don't think thats going to happen and this thread is littered with people saying "Urgh, just messaged 25 women, hope I get something back!"

Just... Argh... I don't understand the mindset.
 
Why though? Do you think the right guy is just going to land on your doorstep? Us guys obviously don't think that going to happen and this thread is littered with people saying "Urgh, just messaged 25 women, hope I get something back!"

Just... Argh... I don't understand the mindset.

It's just who they are really, they are set in their ways. People are attached to the stigma's with online dating and men/women in general.

It is refreshing to see people do something different, I'd also bet those people find happiness a lot faster than the rest.

Raymond Lin was right to some extent with his binman sentance, and women know this. Thats why they tend not to bother messaging people and let guys do the chasing.

What they don't know though is that their more likely to be messed around whilst hoping to find the right guy.
 
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