Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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.Lethal said:
It's just who they are really, they are set in their ways. People are attached to the stigma's with online dating and men/women in general.

It is refreshing to see people do something different, I'd also bet those people find happiness a lot faster than the rest.

Raymond Lin was right to some extent with his binman sentance, and women know this. Thats why they tend not to bother messaging people and let guys do the chasing.

What they don't know though is that their more likely to be messed around whilst hoping to find the right guy.
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I will just have to take your wise words, you obviously have a greater appreciation in such matters.

The whole thing just comes across as really (no offence intended to any females present) big headed and egotistical: "Oh the boys will all come to me". I guess I had just hoped we had moved on a tad from the 1920s style courtship and rules, it appears its as alive as ever in a new digital era.
 
Luseac said:
Why though? Do you think the right guy is just going to land on your doorstep? Us guys obviously don't think thats going to happen and this thread is littered with people saying "Urgh, just messaged 25 women, hope I get something back!"

Just... Argh... I don't understand the mindset.
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Well it's because I receive enough messages as it is already, so doesn't seem like much point in sending more messages myself. ":rolleyes:" I know... But the standard of men messaging me now is a bit meh so I'm going to start the searching and messaging ..
 
It's not how society is though, I wonder how many of the typical POF women could handle it if they messaged 20 guys and got no reply, or 1 liners back.

It's the same in pubs/clubs, most women don't make the first move because they can't handle being rejected, instead they do crap like look over in a guys direction and make eye contact and/or smile and hope the guy has the balls to come over and make the first move.

I actually wonder how many couples there actually would be if men weren't always initiating.
 
MisChief said:
Well it's because I receive enough messages as it is already, so doesn't seem like much point in sending more messages myself. ":rolleyes:" I know... But the standard of men messaging me now is a bit meh so I'm going to start the searching and messaging ..
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Forgive me, but if you've been on pof for over a year then your "let them come to me" attitude obviously isn't producing good results. Surely you would be much better tailoring your requirements in the advanced search and messaging a higher "standard" of man.

Quite why it's needed this discussion for you to even consider it is a bit :confused: though.
 
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knip said:
Should I start stalking you now I'm on there? :D
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LOL, if you like. :p

Although I have concluded that girls are too complicated anyway...

I am going to officially stop looking/chasing. They say love happens when you least expect it. Well, I am going to test that theory out. :D
 
Raymond Lin said:
LOL, if you like. :p

Although I have concluded that girls are too complicated anyway...

I am going to officially stop looking/chasing. They say love happens when you least expect it. Well, I am going to test that theory out. :D
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Pah I did that. It's been 4 years! :O
 
Luseac said:
Forgive me, but if you've been on pof for over a year then your "let them come to me" attitude obviously isn't producing good results. Surely you would be much better tailoring your requirements in the advanced search and messaging a higher "standard" of man.

Quite why it's needed this discussion for you to even consider it is a bit :confused: though.
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Because I wasn't actively searching for guys like you lot are searching for girls. I initially signed up to make some friends, saw POF as a bit of entertainment, didn't really use it much, only logged on whenever I received messages. So I wasn't really all that bothered whether I was finding the right guy or not. But I only recently thought 'right, I'm getting on a bit and need to find a man' so that's why I'm now paying a bit more attention to the site.
 
Luseac said:
The whole thing just comes across as really (no offence intended to any females present) big headed and egotistical: "Oh the boys will all come to me". I guess I had just hoped we had moved on a tad from the 1920s style courtship and rules, it appears its as alive as ever in a new digital era.
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I think it's that people generally are set in their ways. If I was to generalise again I would point out that a lot of girls believe they have up until around the age of 30 to find the right guy before they start worrying.

Once they reach 30 the ones that haven't settled down may ask themself why haven't I found the right guy? And it'll be because they didn't actually look or start up conversations, they might have just stood there waiting for people to approach them whilst "Mr. Right" may not have had the initiative to strike up that conversation with said girl. These girls may be the nicest people in the world and at the same time, the only thing that could be the downfall, is that they won't approach men.

The end result is nice guys being single and women not finding the right "nice guy".

Guys can lack confidence when they see a pretty girl because they see other guys with loads of confidence boasting or chatting up these women (or alpha men you could say).

One of the best solutions for guys lacking confidence is to just talk to women more, or strike up a conversation with a girl you meet whilst waiting for the bus.

Most of my post is generalisation mind, it won't be how everyone is but a lot of people are like this in my opinion.
 
.Lethal said:
I think it's that people generally are set in their ways. If I was to generalise again I would point out that a lot of girls believe they have up until around the age of 30 to find the right guy before they start worrying.

Once they reach 30 the ones that haven't settled down may ask themself why haven't I found the right guy? And it'll be because they didn't actually look or start up conversations, they might have just stood there waiting for people to approach them whilst "Mr. Right" may not have had the initiative to strike up that conversation with said girl. These girls may be the nicest people in the world and at the same time, the only thing that could be the downfall, is that they won't approach men.

The end result is nice guys being single and women not finding the right "nice guy".

Guys can lack confidence when they see a pretty girl because they see other guys with loads of confidence boasting or chatting up these women (or alpha men you could say).

One of the best solutions for guys lacking confidence is to just talk to women more, or strike up a conversation with a girl you meet whilst waiting for the bus.

Most of my post is generalisation mind, it won't be how everyone is but a lot of people are like this in my opinion.
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Very interesting, thanks for your take on things. I guess to summarise, guys need to go around approaching loads of women and forge a skin as thick as leather until Miss Right appears :(
 
Luseac said:
Very interesting, thanks for your take on things. I guess to summarise, guys need to go around approaching loads of women and forge a skin as thick as leather until Miss Right appears :(
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Yeah pretty much, because if you want to find someone - its you that has to change, you can't wait for everyone else to change.
 
I have the urge to put in my profile that "A picture is worth a thousand words. This is me, this is who I am - [Insert pictures that i have taken]"
 
Luseac said:
Very interesting, thanks for your take on things. I guess to summarise, guys need to go around approaching loads of women and forge a skin as thick as leather until Miss Right appears :(
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Well yeah, do something enough times and it becomes less scary and even routine, rejection is the same. Eventually you'll find someone who you share chemistry with.
 
Raymond Lin said:
LOL, the romantic and fun kind :p
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*Goes to rate images section; looks for said pictures; flags as shirtless, reject/disapprove/delete*


tumblr_lidovl3FAG1qbixnn.jpg
 
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