Perhaps he only wanted the crappy situation to impact himself, so broke up with the gf to avoid dragging her into what he perceived to be a messy, stressful situation?
Crazy exs.
- Thread starter kaffe
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Perhaps he only wanted the crappy situation to impact himself, so broke up with the gf to avoid dragging her into what he perceived to be a messy, stressful situation?
Your ex doesnt sound so crazy OP...crazy ex's are the ones who come to your house in the middle of the night, banging on your door whilst your having a quiet evening in with friends...you open the door and she barges past you, walks to the kitchen and grabs a knife and proceeds to try and kill you
...now thats a crazy ex and yes this happened to me a few yrs ago....my nutty ex at the time cut the back of my neck twice...thankfully not too serious just similar to a papercut but ill say that i was pretty much scared as i thought she was really going to stab me or cut my jugular...thankfully my friends jumped in and stopped it before it got too serious.
No i didnt call the police even though i should have but the fact she has 2 young kids, not mine made me decide not to pursue it further....i just hope to god she got some help :/
...now thats a crazy ex and yes this happened to me a few yrs ago....my nutty ex at the time cut the back of my neck twice...thankfully not too serious just similar to a papercut but ill say that i was pretty much scared as i thought she was really going to stab me or cut my jugular...thankfully my friends jumped in and stopped it before it got too serious. No i didnt call the police even though i should have but the fact she has 2 young kids, not mine made me decide not to pursue it further....i just hope to god she got some help :/
Associate
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When my ex and I broke up after 2 1/2 years I couldn't for the life of me work out why. To me it seemed like things were working and we were happy. Over the last year we've managed to remain really good friends, which actually made it harder to understand Rhe reasons for our split. I assumed that I'd done something that changed the way they felt about me.
Recently, about 18months on from the split, I went up to theirs to help them and thier new partner pack for a move down south. I watched the way my ex treated their (injured) new partner, and thought back to when I needed looked after over the course of our relationship and how different they were with us. We also fought that day too for the first time since we split, and it was just like it was when we were together. I realised then why'd split - you can't help how you feel, and if it doesn't feel right it doesn't work.
I guess my point is sometimes it takes time and distance to see that kind of thing. My ex wasn't the person I fell in love with, and I wasn't the person they fell in love with. It happens and often there is no tangible reason.
Recently, about 18months on from the split, I went up to theirs to help them and thier new partner pack for a move down south. I watched the way my ex treated their (injured) new partner, and thought back to when I needed looked after over the course of our relationship and how different they were with us. We also fought that day too for the first time since we split, and it was just like it was when we were together. I realised then why'd split - you can't help how you feel, and if it doesn't feel right it doesn't work.
I guess my point is sometimes it takes time and distance to see that kind of thing. My ex wasn't the person I fell in love with, and I wasn't the person they fell in love with. It happens and often there is no tangible reason.
Your ex doesnt sound so crazy OP...crazy ex's are the ones who come to your house in the middle of the night, banging on your door whilst your having a quiet evening in with friends...you open the door and she barges past you, walks to the kitchen and grabs a knife and proceeds to try and kill you
No i didnt call the police even though i should have but the fact she has 2 young kids, not mine made me decide not to pursue it further....i just hope to god she got some help :/
Indeed, one of my exs stole her friends motorbike (she has no license), got drunk, and tried to kill herself on it. All because I split up with her after I realised I couldn't trust her any more.
Honest advice?
I would be thinking "fall back ****" incase I didn't pull one night because he's clearly shown he isn't interested.
Don't give him any option of any return and if he is still interested at some point in the future he will make the effort to get back in the good books if thats what he really wants rather than easing back into things because single life isn't quite as fun as he thought it would be.
What sort of gd thread is this??!!! It's full of proper advice
Because its a woman. You can see and hear the white knights riding in from miles away
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Caporegime
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He broke up with you because Raymond Lin threatened him with a gory death if he didn't. You are now dating Raymond (whether you know it or not).
Some people just aren't compatible. You don't really get to know someone until a few months in, at which point you may find out you don't share as much in common as you thought. At this point break up, move on.
Sometimes people just decide they're not happy, and once their mind is made up it's difficult for anyone to change their mind and stop them changing their circumstances. If I was that guy doing that (which I wouldn't, because I'm lovely and a great communicator, natch).... then I think I'd have to see the grass wasn't greener on the other side.
No point you hanging around for them if this is the way he's treating you, that's what I think. Just say (as mentioned I think) - well I'm here if you want to talk/change your mind. But don't put your own life on hold. You've been treated like dirt, frankly... and once you've had time to think, I doubt you'll have time for them any more. Nor should you feel bad if that is the case.
p.s. I hear North Yorkshire's nice this time of year
No point you hanging around for them if this is the way he's treating you, that's what I think. Just say (as mentioned I think) - well I'm here if you want to talk/change your mind. But don't put your own life on hold. You've been treated like dirt, frankly... and once you've had time to think, I doubt you'll have time for them any more. Nor should you feel bad if that is the case.
p.s. I hear North Yorkshire's nice this time of year
Because its a woman. You can see and hear the white knights riding in from miles away
I've got my coconut halves at the ready... *CLIP CLOP CLIP CLOP*
Whilst it will be frustrating and also play on your mind to not know why he dumped you, you’d be better of just leaving him to it and get on with your life.
Problem with guys, and from a guy who did dump my last girlfriend that once they decide they no longer want to be with a girl, then its fairly over with. Guys don’t generally dump unless they no longer feel they are in the relationship for some reason, even if its just to get a romp in bed every so often….
If you offer him an option for you being ‘fair game’ he’ll exercise this as a way to get a quickie whilst he’ll keep his options open and eventually dump you for someone else and then you’ll be really hurt, not that this doesn’t hurt you already.
That’s if he even wants to have a ‘quickie’ with you, chances are he’ll even reject that from you, and this’ll only make your curiosity and hurt even worse, as you’ll become insecure and question if you’re even desirable anymore.
I’d say as he did the dumping, don’t chase him, call him or even text him. Forget about him, get out have a hairdo, get your nails done, buy a new outfit, look in the mirror and go “any guy would want this” and find someone who’ll give you respect, want to be with you and be considerate and you’ll soon forget about him…
Know its easy for us all to say this, as they say good men are hard to find, but so are good women and you sound a good one, so get some retail therapy and make yourself feel good instead of searching for an answer that you’ll perhaps never get.
Who knows why he dumped you, if he was moody for a week or so before he dumped you, then chances are he was bottling something up for months, as guys tend to do this., we're not known for showing feelings or emotions - men eh??? His loss and someone else’s future gain..
Problem with guys, and from a guy who did dump my last girlfriend that once they decide they no longer want to be with a girl, then its fairly over with. Guys don’t generally dump unless they no longer feel they are in the relationship for some reason, even if its just to get a romp in bed every so often….
If you offer him an option for you being ‘fair game’ he’ll exercise this as a way to get a quickie whilst he’ll keep his options open and eventually dump you for someone else and then you’ll be really hurt, not that this doesn’t hurt you already.
That’s if he even wants to have a ‘quickie’ with you, chances are he’ll even reject that from you, and this’ll only make your curiosity and hurt even worse, as you’ll become insecure and question if you’re even desirable anymore.
I’d say as he did the dumping, don’t chase him, call him or even text him. Forget about him, get out have a hairdo, get your nails done, buy a new outfit, look in the mirror and go “any guy would want this” and find someone who’ll give you respect, want to be with you and be considerate and you’ll soon forget about him…
Know its easy for us all to say this, as they say good men are hard to find, but so are good women and you sound a good one, so get some retail therapy and make yourself feel good instead of searching for an answer that you’ll perhaps never get.
Who knows why he dumped you, if he was moody for a week or so before he dumped you, then chances are he was bottling something up for months, as guys tend to do this., we're not known for showing feelings or emotions - men eh??? His loss and someone else’s future gain..
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Soldato
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<John Wayne> Don't worry little lady, I'll fix your wagon. </John Wayne>
I was actually almost sick a little.
He doesn't know any other women
Not ruling it out, I mean I left my ex for him so I know it happens. But I remain pretty confident that's not why.
Maybe your ex felt the same as you do now.
Ask him for advice and how he felt.
Your ex doesnt sound so crazy OP...crazy ex's are the ones who come to your house in the middle of the night, banging on your door whilst your having a quiet evening in with friends...you open the door and she barges past you, walks to the kitchen and grabs a knife and proceeds to try and kill you
No i didnt call the police even though i should have but the fact she has 2 young kids, not mine made me decide not to pursue it further....i just hope to god she got some help :/
I'm asking if I'm a crazy ex, not saying he is
You've all made a fair point, no good me telling him I'm fair game. It's unclassy and will only end in tears!!
I'm asking if I'm a crazy ex, not saying he is
You've all made a fair point, no good me telling him I'm fair game. It's unclassy and will only end in tears!!
You're not crazy, just hurt and confused.
He obviously has issues if he's ready to just jump out of a relationship like that, and those are issues that you probably don't want to have to get involved with. (as they'll continue to cause problems in the future without a doubt)
Just allow yourself time away and let the healing be done.
Naaaaaaaaw thanks.
I thought the boyfriend was that small deer looking thing that I forgot its name
Muntjac dammit!!!!!