The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

Xandrael said:
I didn't think she'd want to go because it's so far away and she doesn't know my friend. Plus I'd have to pay for a hotel room then as there would be too many of us to stay in one room.

Just sent a text to my gf saying that I'm sorry I didn't take her feelings into consideration and have cancelled the trip because it doesn't feel right. I'm also going to order a huge bouquet of flowers to her work as she always says how much she likes them and that I should have them in my flat. What's the appropriate amount to spend?
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Anything less than £200 is just cheap. You don't want her to think you're cheap, do you?
 
It's pretty simple Xandrael, you can't hang out with girls one on one if you've banged them or intend to bang them. Ideally you'd only hang out one on one with female work colleagues in a professional environment or women your girlfriend knows and trusts, or family members. In return you can expect the same of them. That way no one is sat home wondering if their partner is ******* another person, everyone's happy.
 
Roar87 said:
It's pretty simple Xandrael, you can't hang out with girls one on one if you've banged them or intend to bang them. Ideally you'd only hang out one on one with female work colleagues in a professional environment or women your girlfriend knows and trusts, or family members. In return you can expect the same of them. That way no one is sat home wondering if their partner is ******* another person, everyone's happy.
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This all seems really complicated. Why can't life just be as simple as Naruto?
 
Xandrael said:
I didn't think she'd want to go because it's so far away and she doesn't know my friend. Plus I'd have to pay for a hotel room then as there would be too many of us to stay in one room.
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Whether it's in another country or whether she knows them or not is completely irrelevant.

I can almost guarantee you that had you approached the situation with asking her first if she'd like to accompany you to meet an old friend from uni, and that you were going to book a hotel somewhere in Cornwall and then meet up for a coffee and some late lunch, and then returned home the following day, would have either had her a) agreeing to come, or b) thanking you for the invite but declining to go and to just let her know when you've arrived. Either situation you're happy with.

As for the flowers... They were winding you up. £40 is plenty and should get a pretty large bouquet.

I hope that she returns your calls and accepts your apology.

But in all seriousness... it really isn't that complicated! Next time you find yourself in a situation where your GF is mad at you for something, you really need to look at how she might perceive things from her side.
 
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Semple said:
Whether it's in another country or whether she knows them or not is completely irrelevant.

I can almost guarantee you that had you approached the situation with asking her first if she'd like to accompany you to meet an old friend from uni, and that you were going to book a hotel somewhere in Cornwall and then meet up for a coffee and some late lunch, and then returned home the following day, would have either had her a) agreeing to come, or b) thanking you for the invite but declining to go and to just let her know when you've arrived. Either situation you're happy with.

As for the flowers... They were winding you up. £40 is plenty and should get a pretty large bouquet.

I hope that she returns your calls and accepts your apology.

But in all seriousness... it really isn't that complicated! Next time you find yourself in a situation where your GF is mad at you for something, you really need to look at how she might perceive things from her side.
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Looks like it doesn't matter now, she's blocked my phone number and deleted me from Facebook! :(

I'll give her a few days to calm down and think about it rationally. If I don't hear anything or if I'm still blocked I guess at least I'll be able to put my wall scrolls back up, but that seems like little consolation now. :(
 
Xandrael said:
Looks like it doesn't matter now, she's blocked my phone number and deleted me from Facebook! :(

I'll give her a few days to calm down and think about it rationally. If I don't hear anything or if I'm still blocked I guess at least I'll be able to put my wall scrolls back up, but that seems like little consolation now. :(
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Give her space and keep yourself busy, don't sit around dwelling on things...

If she want's it to work, she will contact you!. Sounds like you've made it clear you want to be with her so balls in her court.
 
I'm not quite sure how you've managed to get a GF with emotional intelligence I've seen thus far.

Expecting your GF to be okay with you staying in a room with someone you used to have sexual relations with is quite naive, borderline idiotic.


I think you owe her a huge apology, and some time to think.
 
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