Nothing wrong with that at all. I never said there was. You simply dont get married and avoid serious relationships.
A serious relationship doesn't need to involve marriage.
You can have a relationship which is identical in every single way to being married, without being married.
You cant get together with someone who is after marriage and then complain when things go south because you dont want to get married.
This works both ways, you cant get together with someone who is doesn't want marriage and then complain when things go south because you want to get married.
Investment is not all monetary. Time and effort are all elements. Whilst I am sure they have a nice house, I am equally sure she would have been happy to live in rented accomodation so they are on a more equal footing (thats an assumption based on general courtesy in a relationship).
The OP is also investing time and effort, along with his £70k...
If the OP decides to buy a house with her anyway, knowing full well she cannot put in any of her own money then that is his choice. But to then use that fact as a bargaining chip is a very poor show.
I don't see where he's using it as a bargaining chip?
He's protecting his assets, which IMO is perfectly reasonable.
Is it an either/or equation? No. What I am saying is compromise is part of a relationship. Middle ground. The 'my way or the highway' mindset will never work in a relationship.
In the case of marriage, yes it is an either/or equation. Marriage is binary, you're either married or not married, there isn't a third option in the middle (unless you want to count some of the "alternatives" e.g. a handfasting?

)
I really don't see the fuss about marriage, it doesn't achieve anything...
Im not forgetting anything, thank you very much. A divorce isnt something that hangs around your neck for the rest of youre life, at 30 years old how would it be difficult to pick up the pieces and carry on? You would still have your job, you would just need to find somewhere new to live, a PITA for sure but hardly something thats going to ruin the remainder of your life.
So your ex keeps the house - you have to move out and find somewhere new to live. Except you can't afford it because you're still having to pay the mortgage on your house, maintenance to your ex, legal costs and child support, so you end up digging into your savings. You finally get on top of everything after 5-6 years, but have no savings left. Boom, there goes your nice retirement fund...
I take it you've never been in that kind of situation then?
Building a company for example from the ground up to a success versus raising kids, I don't see everyone making successful companies all over the place do you? .
You don't have kids do you
Not everyone brings up kids well either, it takes a lot of hard work, dedication and sacrifice, and unlike building a company, if it gets too much for you, you can't just turn round and decide you've had enough.